"Wrong, wrong, wrong!"

Elise flinched, stumbling in her tracks. This time, she had thought, she had finally been doing an okay job. She was getting out of breath, her legs heavier, her clothes clammy with sweat and clinging to her heated skin. But apparently it still hadn't been enough.

"You," Jen declared, "are still—too—stiff. Don't just stand there, Ellie!" She made a grand gesture. "Move!"

Gritting her teeth, Elise swallowed the urge to snap a biting response. It felt more and more like she was back in middle school, scrambling her way through gym class while her teacher yelled at her in front of everyone. But she hadn't been able to yell at her gym teacher back then, and she couldn't yell at Jen now. Back then she had simply been scared. Right now she didn't want to ruin the band's mood completely.

"I'm trying," she gasped out, reaching for her water bottle and taking a big gulp. Damn it, she was running low already. She needed to ration her water, or she would suffer later.

"You don't look like you're trying!" Jen replied, sounding frustrated in her turn. "You're just standing around there singing!"

Now that was too far.

Forgetting her exhaustion and her manners, Elise dropped her bottle and spun around to glare down at her. "Okay, first of all—"

"Maybe give her an example?"

Pausing, they both turned to look at Felix, who had stood up to eye them over his drum set. "I'm not sure what you want her to do either," he told Jen. "Maybe she's gonna get it if you show her."

Jen's eyes lit up as she considered the idea. Then she reached into her pocket and pulled out her phone. "That's a pretty good idea, actually," she remarked. "Hang on, let me show you something."

A few moments later, she extended the phone towards Elise. Displayed on the screen was a YouTube video; one Elise herself had already seen a few times.

"Try Try Try by The 4AM?" she asked incredulously. "I mean, okay, but why—"

The video started playing. Despite her exhaustion and the poor sound quality, Elise found herself entranced. The 4AM were her favorite band, the one that had captured her heart when she couldn't usually bring herself to care about celebrities at all. There was just something about the energy these four brought to the stage, their joy of playing paired with the close friendship they shared, that had drawn her in from the very first time she had seen them. Especially their vocalist, Jackson Song, was fascinating. Barely five foot six, the man's personality was a fire larger than life, alternating between a cheerful sparkler and a blinding flame.

Almost like—

Elise looked up. Suddenly she understood why she had been so taken with Jen from the start; she was just like Jack on stage, the man whose performance had overcome even Elise's apathy towards band members. These two were cut from the same fabric, and it was only a matter of time until Jen made it as big as Jack.

There was just one catch.

"Hang on," Elise said. "You want me to perform like Jack from The 4AM?"

The way she asked that question already made it obvious how impossible she thought the request was. She could never be like Jack; she didn't have his energy, for a start, didn't have his personality or his seemingly endless lung capacity. Out of all the members of The 4AM, she had always related the most to the guitarist, Miguel: a quiet, good-natured man whose calm, gentle personality offered a foil to Jack's hot-blooded temperament.

All the same, a shadow of hurt flickered across Jen's face. "I've been using him to learn for ages," she said defensively. "What about it?"

Elise sighed. "Look," she said, "I mean, I can try, but that's like asking a cooking newbie to prepare a three-course meal. You know what I mean?"

Jen's face fell even further. "Just try it," she urged.

Dread crawled over Elise's spine. She could tell, just tell, that she was about to make a complete fool of herself. Imitate Jackson Song? So far she had only ever done that in front of the mirror, as a joke, behind closed doors where no one could see her nonsense. But Jen, it seemed, was really, really bad with being told no. And frustrating as it was, Elise simply couldn't stand seeing her all upset like this.

So she pushed down her panic. "Okay…"

The band started playing the song again. Closing her eyes, Elise tried her best to channel Jackson Song, exhaustion and embarrassment notwithstanding. Her memory was aided by Jen beside her, throwing herself into the music body, mind and soul.

Elise's voice was coming out breathy and unstable from the exhaustion, but she tried to focus on the performance. She threw herself forward. She gestured with her arms, moved back and forth, from side to side, without any plan or idea what she was doing. Her whole brain was focused on not accidentally colliding with Jen, who was doing the same thing a million times better. Several times she almost slipped and fell on the floor.

And yet, when they were finished, Jen was smiling. "Yeah, just like that!" she exclaimed. "Now we just have to work on your singing and we're good!"

"And my stamina," Elise gasped out, helping herself to another gulp of water. "I can't keep this up for twenty minutes yet."

"You can work on that, right?" Jen replied, sitting down beside her. "Go running or something."

Now Elise was definitely getting middle school flashbacks. "Or something," she admitted with a laugh. "Running triggers my asthma really hard. But I'm sure I can find some other sport!"

"Good!" Jen gave her a hearty pat on the shoulder. "Just be ready for the gig, we don't have that long."

To Elise, that goal felt more impossible than ever.

But Jen was finally happy, so she kept her mouth shut.

~ ~ ~

Time passed. Elise's stamina barely improved at all.

She didn't know what the problem was. But no matter what she did, as soon as she sang and performed at once, she was completely out of breath after one song, two songs at the very most. There was no way in hell she could possibly push that limit up to twenty minutes in time for the festival.

"Just what are you doing?" Jen snapped at her when she had to catch her breath once again, clearing her throat when her lungs rebelled against the sudden strain. "You're not even trying, Ellie!"

"I am trying," Elise rasped out. "I don't know why it's not getting better, okay? I've tried everything!"

"I don't believe you!"

Elise flinched. Jen was glaring up at her with dark, gleaming eyes, looking equal parts frustrated and betrayed.

Betrayed? Really? Why was she the one feeling betrayed here?

"I bet you haven't been practicing at all!" Jen threw at her, each word like a white-hot stab in the chest. "You're just saying that, right? And that's why you're not getting better, you liar!"

Elise took a sharp, hissing breath.

"I dare you to call me a liar again," she said, her voice hardened by the lump growing in her throat. "You have no idea how hard I've been trying—"

"But you've never really tried anyway!"

Marching all up in her face, Jen flung out her arms in a desperate, furious gesture. "You're always 'I can't do it' this and 'I'm not sure' that! Can you just stop being so negative for five goddamn seconds?"

"Negative? I'm realistic!" Elise shouted back. "I'm sorry my body is so flipping useless I have to manage expectations like that! I'm sorry I suck so bad, okay?"

"No, you're not!" Jen burst out. "I'm serious about this band, okay? And you just don't care!"

That stab sank deep.

"Well, yeah!" Elise replied, burning hot tears darting into her eyes. "It's almost like you dragged me into this when all I wanted to do was write songs!"

Now it was Jen's turn to look like someone had slapped her across the face. Her eyes, dark and smoldering just a moment ago, were suddenly wide and vulnerable. Regret shot through Elise's chest. Why had she said that? She didn't even mean it!

But she was also upset, and she was angry, and she was tired, and she was pushed way past the breaking point, and all of that was a strong enough combination to keep her going anyway.

"I'm exhausted, okay?" she went on. "It's not like you'd understand that! You have no idea what it's like to live with a body that's always just waiting to stab you in the back! You have no idea what it's like to drag yourself through gym class when you can already barely breathe! You have no idea what it's like to push yourself to the breaking point just to pull off the bare minimum!" Her voice cracked, but she didn't care anymore. She didn't care about anything. "But hey!" she added. "It's not like I expect you to know that you're literally sounding like my gym teachers right now!"

Jen flinched. At least that part, it seemed, had struck the mark.

But the shock on her face lasted barely for a moment before she, too, raised her voice again. "You just keep giving up!" she yelled. "I'm not asking you for much, okay? I just want to see you trying!"

I'm not getting through.

The realization shot through her like a flash of electricity. Elise shut down, a lock clicking closed on the door to her heart. From one moment to the next, her voice was icy cold and perfectly quiet.

"You know what," she said. "If you really think I'm that lazy, go on without me."

All anger faded from Jen's face, leaving only shock and horror behind. "What?"

"I'm leaving." Grabbing her bag, Elise made for the door. "You don't need a second singer, anyway."

"Ellie, wait—"

Zahir, who had watched in helpless panic for the entire argument, tried to stumble between them. "Yeah, wait," he said. "How about you both…cool off for five minutes? And then talk it out?"

Elise hesitated. She was causing the band trouble right now, she knew. Was she being overly dramatic? Maybe. But it was either get out of here or break down crying in front of everyone.

"Maybe later," she said, and then left.

"Ellie, you can't leave!" Jen's voice rang out behind her, and then, "I'm sorry—"

But Elise didn't answer. She only hurried out of the building, collapsed on the front porch, buried her head between her knees and burst into tears.