Author: Foxnflames

Genre: BL/mystery/drama

What I liked about this book:

The outdoorsy, woodsy aesthetic is nice. I like the past lives aesthetic.

What I did NOT like about this book:

Ditch the prologue. I couldn't tell for a solid page and a half who I was reading about, and you opened with a bunch of dry exposition I honestly did not give a shit about. I stopped reading about halfway through and skipped to chapter one.

...Where I promptly had the same problem.

It took me way too long to figure out who I was reading about, and whether or not I should give a shit about them (short answer: no, which is why I only got two more chapters in).

Part of the problem is your sentences all have the same structure. They kind of look like this:

Susan has a ball. She likes playing with her ball. She took the ball into the forest. She kicked it. She watched the ball go over the fence. She climbed over the fence after the ball. She was sad her ball went over the fence.

See how boring it is to read? That's because all the sentences are structured exactly the same. You need to mix it up a bit and it'd make it a good bit less dry.

Overall:

Boring, and also doesn't give me any character insight fast enough for me to want to read

Rating:

2/10, rewrite this please.