OLIVE
We only stayed at sicky's house for like one day, because the dang zombies attacked. I of course was keeping watch all night, thanks to Arizona's Mountain Dew stash. I have hawk's eyes.
I saw the giant pink beast a mile away. I warned the group and we all ran out to fight the female zombie. These ones are way freaking big, too big for ninja stars. June shot it with her boomstick twice and it was like barely even slowed down. Then Jared comes running out of the house in his boxers like the inappropriate weirdo he is and starts wailing on the zombie with a shovel. That of course didn't do squat.
Arizona and sicky have an arsenal of their own but their guns are not high powered. They exist to harm or stun, not to kill.
I, fortunately, came up with a genius plan! Before the zombie could advance further into the yard, I reached into the cardboard box beside me and grabbed a fresh can of caffeinated green goodness. With true aim, I launched the unopened can at the zombie queen, and with a loud and satisfying CLUNK it bounced majestically off of her rotting skull. A dazzling beam of light reflected off of the can as it flew into the street and bled out its contents.
The zombie fell, defeated by my hand, and I let out a fierce war cry to the dawn.
JARED
Olive would make a much better dead body than a live idiot.
Can a man not have the buttcrack of dawn to himself?! And since when was it my job to protect these losers? I'm the delinquent of the group. I'm here to do the clean-up after they get killed...my kind of clean-up that is.
I'm not here to use my precious shovel to kill off the living dead when officer nut job screams for help. I hate the living dead! I honestly normally hate the living! Honestly, the only reason I came along is because June looks pretty when she's asleep - cause she looks dead!
Okay so maybe I like her company too, and if she was killed by a female spore shooting superzombie that would probably stink, but still.
And you know what, the living dead are ruining my fetish. There, I said it. I can never know if I'm gonna dig up a stiff or a breather! Dang breathers and their nasty spores. Dang Olive and her forcing me to get dressed when I need some privacy to return to my passion in the night.
At least now they have another man in the group. They got some cute kid with cancer or something they can rely on when I sneak away later.
Of course I'm gonna sneak away. I am not a people person...at least I'm not an Olive person. They can keep her.
As soon as I can, I'm gonna pack up a few things I stole from the two new kids to the 'group' and head out to get some new clothes and shoes. Maybe I'll take June with me.
MAURICE
I found Angel in a phone booth, 'cause these still exist. She was hiding from the undead. I had to use a crowbar to get the door opened, which I took from a propped trunk of a crashed vehicle. More defense for the survivors! Why shouldn't the zombie apocalypse be like a game of football?
I helped her out and offered to carry her to wherever she needed to go. She was ridiculously small anyways, and cute. I liked her big hair and short skirt. I had never seen a girl so pretty. For most of my life I had assumed I was ace, but my mind was in total get-the-girl mode now. We were the same age, and had attended rival schools. Had we gone to the same school, we might've been destined to be together. Jock and pretty popular girl, prom king and queen, most likely to succeed...that would've been awesome.
While she was riding on my shoulders, she told me about how she wanted to go into fashion, and that she loved romance novels, and romantic comedies, and how right after high school, she wanted to go to beauty school. It was very cute, because her makeup was smudged beyond help the whole time she was talking.
We stopped at a corner store once, and she said all she wanted was water, to keep her figure.
I had to make a choice: let the cute go and worry about myself, or let the cute win and let her in...and let her know I'm trans.
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