When Julian felt how much Nick tensed under him he decided to pull away, even though he wanted nothing more than to continue. He was still painfully hard, and he had felt how Nick had gotten hard as well, but the other man wasn’t ready to go any further, and Julian would never push anyone to do so.

They were sitting there, smiling like fools, both with a hard-on, in complete silence. Nick looked like one who didn’t know what to say or do with himself, and Julian didn’t know if he could find the right words, but after a long time, he decided that saying something was better than saying absolutely nothing.

‘’I’m sorry about that,’’ Julian said as he shook his head a little, ‘’I didn’t mean for it to go too far.’’

‘’Don’t apologize,’’ Nick answered as he took Julian’s hand and kissed it gently, ‘’I wanted it… I’m just not ready for anything else right now.’’

‘’It’s fine. If it happens it happens, if not… then we still have this.’’ He answered as he leaned over and kissed Nick’s lips again.

‘’To be honest-‘’ Nick began as a blush spread across his cheeks, ‘’-I don’t even know how to do it… with another man, I mean.’’

‘’You don’t have to worry about that… it’s not difficult,’’ Julian said confidently, though his rapid heart was threatening to give away the truth. The thought of having to explain it to Nick if he wanted him to, was making him shy. He didn’t know if he could do that… Nick probably knew the basics, but Julian wanted to make sure that it would be perfect the first time. That was one of the reasons why Julian knew that Nick was different than those who took advantage of him. They didn’t care to ask or to tell him that they didn’t know what they were doing. They didn’t stop him when the kiss went too far. They just fucked him and left.

‘’I want to try it though,’’ Nick mumbled a little shyly. ‘’just not yet.’’

‘’I’m fine with waiting.’’ Julian pressed his lips against Nick’s again, and he could feel him smile through the kisses. everything just felt right. 

They just sat there for a while, sharing kisses and talking about everything and nothing. Sometimes there was silence between them, but it never felt awkward. They just understood each other without talking, and it was a new feeling for him. Normally he couldn't stand silence when he was spending his time with someone else, but everything was different with Nick, and he hoped Nick felt the same. 

‘’What did Katie think of you leaving so early?’’ Julian asked after a while.

‘’Nothing actually. She’s not home and won’t be until tomorrow.’’ Julian’s heart skipped a beat at that. He hoped that it meant they could spend the whole night together, but he wasn’t sure if Nick was up to that yet, and he didn’t want to ask already.

‘’Well then,’’ Julian said as he leaned over and kissed him. ‘’What’s the plan for today then?’’

‘’I kind of hoped you had a plan,’’ Nick whispered against his lips, as he stroked a hand through Julian’s hair to hold him in place.

‘’Nope, not at all,’’ Julian laughed. ‘’Maybe we could spend the day at the lake? The weather is amazing, and it’s just lovely to be down there… I don’t know why, but I feel drawn to it somehow.’’ He admitted. Ever since he'd arrived at this place, the lake had drawn him to it. He couldn't stay away from it, even if he wanted to. 

‘’I do too. It feels like it’s alive sometimes. Like I can actually feel it.’’ Nick explained honestly.

‘’I’m glad I’m not the only one thinking that… I thought I was losing my mind.’’ Julian laughed as he scratched his neck a little shyly. The way the lake made him feel definitely made him feel like he was going mad. It wasn’t normal, but it never felt wrong… it always gave him a feeling of calmness and happiness.

‘’Then what are we waiting for?’’ Nick asked as he stood up and held his hand out for Julian to take, and he accepted it without hesitation. ‘’Let’s get down there and go crazy together. But we have to go back to my place first… I have something I want to bring.’’

‘’And what is that?’’ Julian asked as they walked out of the front door, hand in hand.

‘’Wine,’’ Nick said and kissed his cheeks, ‘’just like the first evening I spent with you.’’

Julian blushed and nodded. He liked that idea very much. That evening had been absolutely perfect. They'd just been talking, laughing, and sharing the expensive bottle of wine between them. They'd gotten a little drunk, but as they'd laid there, in the soft sand, looking into each other's eyes, Julian had sobered up as the buzzing in his head had gotten out of control, and he had wanted nothing more but to lean forward and kiss Nick's soft lips. 

Back at the mansion, Nick went into the kitchen, and Julian was left to himself to look around in the living room. He studied all the furniture and every single painting on the walls. They looked expensive, but Julian had no idea who’d painted it.

He stopped in front of a large one… a painting of a small lake, that looked a lot like the one that made his head buzz. He wondered if that was why the painting was able to catch his attention.

He heard Nick walk up behind him, and the other man laid his arms around his waist and held him close.

‘’Do you like it?’’ Nick whispered in his ear before nipping at it gently, ‘’the painting.’’

‘’Yes,’’ Julian answered as he cocked his head a bit when Nick began kissing his throat. ‘’But I don’t understand most art though. But it is beautiful.’’

‘’Just like you,’’ Nick whispered, and his gentle breath was tickling his neck. He couldn’t stop himself from getting a bit shy. He had never been good at getting compliments, though he liked it when it came from someone like Nick. ‘’Shall we get going?’’

‘’Yes,’’ Julian said as he turned around in Nick’s arms and wrapped his arms around his neck, and kissed him hard. ‘’Let’s go.’’ He pulled away and took Nick’s hand in his and they left the mansion, hand in hand, like a real couple.

The light buzzing in his head was back as they got closer to the lake, and he wondered if Nick could feel it too. It wasn't normal, but it didn't matter, because it had brought Nick and Julian together. 

Julian decided that it was a good idea to take off his shirt before he sitting down in the sand next to Nick. It was a really warm summer day, and he didn’t want to be wrapped up in clothes… besides, the way it made Nick’s cheeks turn red, might’ve been one of the reasons too. The other man just stared at his blotted abdomen with wide eyes, he opened and closed his mouth a couple of times, but no words came out, and Julian couldn’t help but smile, since he found it very adorable. He wished Nick would take off his shirt too, just so he could see more of him… kiss more of him, but Nick didn’t seem like the kind of guy who would do something like that in public, and Julian didn't understand why, since every part of Nick felt like it was perfect, but he would never force him to do it, no matter how much he wanted him to. 

Julian laid down onto his back and smiled up and Nick, who turned around enough to look back at him. The buzzing got stronger when their eye met, and he just wished Nick would lay down on top of him at kissing him… Julian settled with laying a hand on Nick’s thigh instead, caressing it gently.

Nick looked down at his hand and smiled before he gently let his fingers dance over the soft skin on Julian’s arm.

‘’I wish this could last forever,’’ Nick whispered, with a saddened expression on his face.

‘’What?’’ Julian asked, taking Nick’s hand in his while squeezing it gently.

‘’This feeling of freedom…‘’ he began before sighing loudly, ‘’you.’’ Nick took a swing of the wine. Julian pushed himself up on his elbows and looked at him with a cocked eyebrow.

‘’It could, you know,’’ Julian said with a little shrug.

‘’How? You know how my life is,’’ Nick mumbled.

‘’Then leave it all behind? It’s simple really… if you want happiness, then don’t push it away when it’s right in front of you.’’

‘’I can’t do that. I have things to do… responsibilities!’’ Nick said with a deep sigh.

‘’Fuck that!’’ Julian almost yelled as he sat up straight. ‘’Fuck all of it. You don’t have to go back… no one is forcing you. You probably have enough money already to live a full life in luxury without even lifting a finger again. So leave it behind and let someone else do the dirty work.’’ He was feeling annoyed, even though he knew he shouldn’t. He couldn’t expect Nick to just leave his old life behind to start a new life with him when he didn’t even know if it would work out between them yet. A gnawing pain made Julian’s stomach hurt. He knew that when these three weeks were over, Nick would leave him behind to go back to his normal life and fake marriage. He dreamt of another outcome, but he couldn’t imagine Nick wanting to give up everything for him.

Nick grabbed Julian’s head gently, before pulling him into a kiss, and Julian pushed all the frustration aside again. He shouldn’t be angry… he had no right to be. He just wanted to live in the present and forget about the future.