A knock came to the apothecary door. Mom wiped her hands off on her apron and shouted. “If that’s you, Ali, just come in!”

“Open the balted door, woman. I got something for you in my good arm.”

Judd. My face broke into a grin of relief as I shoved away the boxes of dried herbs.

Mom rolled her eyes and nodded for me to open the door. On the others side waited Dad’s boss, one of the most chewed up pieces of human being to walk Gyra’s streets. Judd Grawl led a team of men through the islands hunting for fresh rift scars. In my mind, that was where the real action was at. His crew ranged all over the islands, searching for the last remnants of the Old World – the stuff (and people) the rifts left in their wake. They paid a tidy sum for healers, and I wanted nothing more than to work for Judd one day. Which of course Mom took to mean that I wanted nothing more than to get myself killed young.

Judd earned his place leading expeditions by killing Kelian nomads as part of the Gyra city guard. One put a knife through his left shoulder, almost severing it at the joint. Almost. Some form of cartilage grew back, allowing him to use the arm on "special occasions." It hung at his side like a dead warrior, covered in ropy, blue veins and clutching a cigarette. Even if his shoulder hardly moved, his fingers worked fine.

“No smoking in the house, Judd,” Mom called as the scent of rolled leaf drifted inside.

“Thought you’d say as much.” He dropped it and stamped a boot over the smoldering tip. In his good arm, he steadied an enormous load of elk meat and hides. “You take this, gally. It’s yours now. You got my order, Heather?”

I barely caught the tumbling pack of steaks and skins. I was lucky to have a bit of my father’s strength built into me, otherwise I would have been flattened. Judd nodded, as if I’d passed some little test. I stifled a proud grin. Judd might look like he’d been trampled by mules a few times, but anyone who could survive that was worth taking seriously.

“That payment enough?” he asked

Mom reached a bag down from the apothecary shelves. “Provided the meat is fresh. I prepared you a duplicate of last year’s order.”

“Fine, fine. But you know what I could really use?” Judd drummed his fingers on the new med kit. “Someone who knows how to use this mumbo-jumbo medicine stuff of yours. How’s old Sean’s fever coming along?”

“Improving,” said Mom resolutely. “Shasta, why don’t you wash your father’s linens?”

“Now?” I liked Judd’s visits and Mom knew it.

“Yes, now.”

I opened my mouth to argue, sure this was beyond the scope of my “no arguing” rule but Judd waved me out as well. “I’ll see you around, gally.”

And at that I had to go, because Judd Grawl was not someone I wanted believing me to be a disobedient daughter. He ran a tight team of trackers and if I wanted to keep my hopes alive that someday he’d let me join, I couldn’t mouth off to authority figures in front of him.

I dragged the wash basin to the pump and worked the handle until the tub was overflowing. Warm sunshine beat against my skin and the smell of chickens squabbling in the hen house cleared my nose of the apothecary’s lavender haze. I splashed some water against my face and reminded myself not to be mad at Mom when I went back inside. She wasn’t trying to make me miserable by separating me from Judd on purpose. Probably.

Behind me, Judd laughed sharply. For a second of deluded pride, I thought he’d followed me outside so we could talk. I craned my neck to see where he was, but I must have heard him from the window into Mom and Dad’s room. I inched closer, hoping to eavesdrop, but before I was in range, Dad’s hand appeared and he latched the window shut. I furrowed my brow. Had he heard me? I doubted it. I had great confidence in my sneakiness. More likely Mom saw the window open and started panicking that Dad would chill himself to death. I loved her and all, but that woman could be crazy-making when she had something to worry about.

The tub was ready, so I headed back to get the laundry. Judd was on his way out when I reached the door. He waved his good arm at me. “See you in the morning, gally.”

“The morning?” I repeated.

“Go ask your parents.” He waved one last time, a knowing smirk on his face.

“Mom?” I dried my wet hands on my pants as I went inside. Did Judd mean what I thought he did? “Judd said you wanted to tell me something?”

“Oh... yes.” She was holding the dirty sheets, bunching them between her fingers and not meeting my eye. “He came to ask about your father. He’s got a group going out to Paumee Island tomorrow morning and he’s one man short. I know we said we’d wait until you’re a little older, but if you’d like, he’d be willing to take you along as a medic.”

A little older? The last time I begged to join one of Judd Grawl’s rift expeditions, Mom banned me from mentioning it again until I turned thirty. I hadn’t dared bring it up since then. For about two seconds, I was the most deliriously excited person in the world. I was getting my way with zero effort. Rift scars! Campfires with Jayce! No more apothecary!

But with one little voice in my head, the euphoria evaporated: Mom had no reason to change her mind. Or at least, none that I knew.

“You don’t need me around the house?” I bounced on my heels, trying to force away that sinking, gut feeling. “Or running the shop?”

“Believe me, I wish I could have you in two places at once.” Mom lifted the sheets into her arms. “But your father could lose his job if we keep inconveniencing Judd. You’re pleased, aren’t you? Jayce is going.”

“I am.” But the longer we talked, the more I sensed there was something important she wouldn’t tell me. “Dad’s okay, right? It’s just pneumonia?”

“It better be.”

“What does he think of me joining?”

“He slept through Judd’s visit,” said Mom. “We’ll tell him later.”

I thought of Dad’s hand, poking out the window, shutting out their voices. I’d seen my mother lie plenty of times before. Most Displaced did from time to time. The only revelation was that something was bad enough she needed to lie to me.

I forced myself to keep smiling. “This is great! Can I tell Jayce? I need to ask him to lend me his short bow.”

“Of course.” Mom smiled. Yup, something was wrong. She was letting me off work.