On February 16th, I  just got off work from a 12-hour shift and I am tired as hell. I drove two hours home falling asleep behind the wheel to reach the house and find out that my boyfriend had left me. Not only that he took all my valuable and moved on somewhere. I call his phone and It goes straight to voicemail who am I kidding I know he blocked me. The way everything went down I can't blame him, it’s sad because I missed his ass and I wanted him to come home so we could work it out. I pick up my phone and call metro PCs and turn his phone off and change my number. I walk around the house assessing the damage. Not only did he steal from me he also broke some of my things. "What the fuck!" I yell getting mad as hell. I know he is mad but it was a bitter game that we both played. I grab a trash bag and start picking up all the broken shit and trying to keep calm. He had some damn nerve I mean really.

February 14th. I had just left the shop after getting my hair done and my nails. I paid extra for a wax. Tonight was Patrick's birthday and I wanted to give him a night to remember. I bought him and diamond pinky ring and a matching watch and chain. I white gold just how he liked it, I broke the bank for my man nothing but the best.

Not to mention it was also Valentine’s Day so I was all over the place. I headed to Victoria's secret for the sexiest teddy I could find. I had everything that I needed so I rushed home and put everything where it needed to be. I bought a ps5 and a matching 4k TV. I had to work overtime to cover this, but taxes were right around the corner so bills wouldn't be an issue. I bought us both plane tickets and a resort couple's suite.

It was 12 pm the day had just gotten started. -Hey, baby, I miss you-He was at the barbershop getting a fresh cut for tonight. He said he needed to do some shopping too, little did he know I had that covered. A sexy matching outfit. I went into the kitchen and started baking his cake, red velvet with extra frosting, and dinner. 

After I finished dinner and his cake I looked at my phone and realized that he hadn't texted back and it was close to 5 pm. What type of haircut was he getting? I called his phone and it went straight to voicemail. I instantly thought the worst so I started calling around his family and friends.

A lot of people were going missing and I couldn't take any chances. I called his mama and his sisters the last person I called was his brother and he told me he had something to tell me something that I needed to know. My heart started to pound what the hell could he have to tell me? A couple of stressful hours later I ran to social media to see if he had been on. He was tagged in a photo about 20 minutes ago.

I opened the photo and it was him and his brother and some other female. "Okay?" I instantly had flashbacks of guys trying me in the past. I took a deep breath. It was his birthday so I couldn't be upset it just happened to be Valentine’s Day. I commented, "Yall cute!" and I closed my phone and continued getting ready for tonight. He was hanging out with his people he would be home soon.

I climbed into my bed and threw on something random on the TV and instantly fell asleep. I had a long ass dream one that when I woke up made me pissed. I opened my eyes to a dark room, I rolled over to my phone, no notifications at all. Okay? I was pissed the dream didn't help I had crazy red flags going off in my head, past trauma so I was trying to get it together.

My dream or nightmare was him fucking that chick in the picture. She turned out to be his baby mama and she was pregnant again. I shook it out of my head and went back into the kitchen. The food wasn't even nibbled off he hadn't been home. It was 9 pm and my valentine’s day was going up in flames.

I clicked back on the photo. He had 40 comments on the photo and he replied to all of them except mine. I clicked on her Facebook to view her page. I didn't need to be doing this it wasn't healthy at all. I was about to close out of everything until I saw more pictures on her page of his ass. This must be a family member I scrolled through her friends and we had mutual friends in common. His brother and cousins had her on their page.

One thing that I had learned in the past was don't go looking and can't handle what you find. I was about to log in to his social media but I threw my phone instead I wasn't ready to go down this road again after a 4-year relationship with no issues. He wasn't giving me a reason to feel this way.

"Bitch, he is cheating on you!" my brain yelled. I pounded my fist on the table cracking it. My first stung as blood leaked from it. "Oh shit, what the hell did I do?" I ran to the bathroom to wash my hand. I wrapped my hand I was doing too much it was only 10 pm I said calming myself down. Why the hell is he doing this to me? My eyes became watery. My throat began to burn. My face was burning. My phone beeped alerting me of new notifications, my screen was broken from me throwing it earlier I couldn't see anything.

My phone was dinging non-stop. My phone started ringing. I used the volume buttons on the side of the phone to answer. "Hello?" I answered. "Don't be mad!" Sean said on the phone. "I'm good," I said annoyed. "You know it's his birthday so we had to show out!" he said. "Yeah, it's cool," I said clenching my fist. "Is he coming home tonight?" I asked.

"What you mean?" he said. "Yall still partying right?" "Don't forget it's valentine’s day duh," I said. "Nevia he said he was taking a chick home and headed to you," he said. "Oh My God! Sean have you called the hospitals to make sure he is okay?" "Was he drinking?" I asked. "Nah he was just smoking..." "But..." "What Sean?" I snapped. "He popped one with old girl." I squeezed my fist so tight that I broke a nail.

My fingers pulsated and I squeezed my eyes closed. "Hello?" he asked. "What time was this?" I said in a monotone voice. "It was at 8 pm. I just talked to him and he said he was at red lobster, which was funny that nigga doesn't even eat seafood."

"Okay, Sean I can't..." "I'm starting to have negative thoughts but I need to trust him he's probably at his mama's house," I said. My phone vibrated hard in my ear.

"What the fuck are you doing nigga?" "NOOOOO!" he said out loud. "What's wrong Sean?" I asked him. "Damn this is fucked up!" he said getting mad. "Nigga why would you do this you stupid!" he yelled. My phone vibrated 8 more times in my ear and someone was calling on the other line. "Sean somebody calling on my other line," I said about to switch over. "Don't!" he yelled quickly.

"This is fucked up!" "But... don't break up with him," he said. "Sean what the fuck aren't you telling me," I said biting the inside of my jaw. "He just posted a video of the chick sucking his dick and he tagged you in it." "Everybody commenting on it, her face showing and all," "Awe Naw it's live," he said pissed "300 comments and it's the crazy head."

"My job has my social media and my young family members too," I said with my lip trembling. I couldn't even do this shit! I was about to spend the whole night crying over his ass, return the shit I bought, and then what? "Who gave him the pill?" I asked. "I did... my bad I just wanted him to have a good time," he explained

"It's cool what are you doing right now?" I asked calmly. "Trying to delete this video! You got his password?" he asked. "It's cool don't even worry about it is his birthday let him have fun." "Sean pull up and bring a pill," I said. "What the hell that means?" he asked. "It means what I said" "you want me to stay with his ass right?" "Well, it's Valentine’s Day and I don't want to be alone," I said. "I won't break up with him," "I want to have a good time too," I said hanging up.

I threw my phone this time breaking it, no point in burning the shit I bought he could have it I didn't even care I was fried. My body was shaking my chest was hot and my head pounding. I needed to calm down this was the only way to fix the situation. Not only was he cheating he put it out for everyone to see.

He was at her house fucking her on live. Is that what pills do? I looked around the house ready to break everything in sight. Headlights shined through the window. I opened my front door in my pre outfit that I picked out for us. "Can we talk Nevia?" he said not coming in. I grabbed his hands pulling him into the house. "Look we don't have to do all this!" he said backing away from me.

"Shut the fuck up!" I yelled unable to hide my emotions. "If you leave I promise I'm done with his stupid ass, I should shoot his stupid ass," I said grabbing my gun and tapping it against the counter. "He playing the fuck out of me!" "Like I'm a lame bitch!" "He tried my soul EVERYBODY KNOWS THIS NOW!" "It can’t just be something that happened it was a real situation that's affecting my damn life."

"GO into that damn room and put on this damn outfit shoes and watch chain and ring!" I snapped at him. "Nevia you got this for him?" he asked. "I spent my last damn dime," I said cracking my neck. He went into the room and got dressed. He came out looking sexy as fuck I wouldn't even need the pill.

I reached into my purse and grabbed the plane tickets slamming them on the counter. "Wow," he said with wide surprised eyes. I wiped a tear as I looked at them. "Let's go," I said. "We cannot go to another country," he said shaking his head at me. I fell to the floor, "I can't get a refund it’s too late." "THE PLANE LEAVES AT 12 pm tomorrow." "Come here," he said hugging me. "I got a resort," I said pouring my face out. I looked at the time it was 11:00 pm I signed hard.

"It’s okay look!" "Open your mouth," he said. I closed my eyes and opened my mouth and I felt the pill hit my tongue and I let the sensation take me. "Let's go," he said opening the door for me. I got into his front seat and he drove me to a club. I held his hand as we walked in. The music was pumping and the vibe was nice. The pill hit me I was feeling it. Sean stood next to me matching we looked so cute. I danced to music and he just stood there. "IM GOING TO THE BAR" he yelled in my ear. I nodded my head and continued dancing.

Some dude brushed up against my ass. I turned around and we met eyes. I smiled at him. The more I let go the better I felt. I jumped on him wrapping my legs around him. He reached his hand under my skirt fingering the fuck out of me. He put me back down and we danced with each other, the whole time we danced he was sniffing his finger and biting his lip. "WANT TO FUCK" he yelled in my ear. The word FUCK came out so slowly turning me on. I nodded my head. And we walked towards the exit, somebody was getting this pussy tonight.

I smiled at the bouncer and he grabbed my arm stopping me from leaving. He flashed his light into my eyes. "Nah," he said holding me back. "YOU GOT TO LEAVE ALONE," he said to the dude. "What the hell?" I said snatching my arm free. "Nevia what the fuck are you doing?" he asked. I looked at him again, it was toney Patrick's cousin. I wasn't ashamed I was pissed as hell he looked like he was about to eat the hell out of my pussy.

I turned around and bumped into Sean, Knocking his drink all over me. I pulled off my shirt exposing my lingerie top. Sean quickly grabbed me and stopped me. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" he asked holding me. "IF YOU NOT GOING TO FUCK ME SEAN GO HOME!" I yelled. Tony looked at us like we were crazy. "SEAN YOU FUCKING PATRICKS GIRL?" "THAT'S HOW WE GET DOWN NOW?" tony asked. "He won't FUCK ME," I said irritated but "BUT HE WAS ABOUT TO WHY YOU STOP HIM?" I yelled. "SEAN WHAT IS SHE ON?" "DID YOU LOOK AT HER EYES SHE IS FUCKED UP?" "I KNOW NIGGA THAT'S WHY I'M HERE," Sean said.

"SEAN COME DANCE WITH ME!" I said grabbing his dick in front of tony. He looked at Sean shaking his head. "THAT'S GREEN BRUH!" "YOU FUCKING RICKS GIRL?" "NO!" he said. "BUT YOU WANT TO! YOU STILL LIKE HER" Tony said shaking his head "I ain't-a snitch that's yall." Sean put his head down and walked with me to the dance floor. I wrapped my arms around his neck and rested my head on his chest. I stood on my tippy toes. "SEAN PLEASE FUCK ME!" I begged in his ear.

"Stop!" he said pushing me away. I just looked him in his eyes I was hurting so bad and I saw no end to this situation. I'm not going to break up with him but I'm gone mentally forever from our relationship. Even now I'm on a pill and I know everything that I am doing and feeling. Which means he fucked her on purpose. I was about to break down in the club. "Take me home," I said walking out of the club.

On the outside, I ran into the dude from before. "There you go I was waiting for you," he said walking up to me. I smiled and embraced him. "Nigga get in the back don't you see her trying to sit down," he said to his homie in the front seat of his car. "I hope you don't mind but my homie down too," he said. I shrugged my shoulders getting ready to step into the car.

"OKAY, I WILL DO IT" Sean yelled. "What's up Sean," he said dapping him up. He looked at Sean then back at me. "Oh, damn this your old lady?" he asked freaking out. I looked at him waiting on his answer. "Yeah, dawg this my Lil baby," he said. "Awe, daamn my bad dog we were about to run her ass." "That pussy is fire no offense."

Sean looked at him like he was about to lay him out. But instead, he grabbed me out of the car. We walked to his car, "What did he mean by your pussy fire?" "You fucked him?" he asked. "Nah I was about to," I said shrugging my shoulder in his car "him and his homeboy." Sean sped up and hit a quick turn at the corner.

"I know he fucked up, but you were about to let both of them fuck you for real?" he asked. “It’s whatever," I said wiping another tear. I was far from sad I was livid. "Nevia that's my blood you don't know what you're asking me to do." "I mean you do it or I will find somebody else," I said sure about my decision.