I've always had a secret crush on my seatmate. For starters, I was some sort of popular guy. I was smart and even captain of the basketball team! But before all of those titles, I first became friends with her in middle school. Around recess time, I would eat in this quiet cafeteria area. Not many people around but she would be there too. My name is Anton, this is the story of my first heartbreak.

This petite girl would give me plenty of candies and snacks, just randomly of course. She even shared her lunch with me. We weren't classmates then but I would make sure that I passed by her classroom anytime that I had a chance too! We never really talked much but I really liked her simple personality and smile. She didn't know my name, but I knew hers. People call her Shalin. In my eyes, she was just this kind-hearted small girl. I knew she was always genuine. I've always wanted and prayed for an opportunity to get to know her. I even tried to improve myself for her. I worked so hard to become the captain of the basketball team. I tried to read some books that she might like. I wanted to be friends with her.

My prayers were answered when it was our last year of high school. I became seatmates with her. Looking back then, she became different. I don't know if anyone noticed but in my eyes, she became more beautiful. A lot of my classmates sometimes teased her in a mean way, but I didn't stand for that. I would always direct a comment to myself. One time, we had this fashion show and the class needed a boy and a girl. None of the girls volunteered but also they were backhandly telling Shalin to volunteer. Shalin was brave enough to say yes, I knew she really didn't want to do it, but peer pressure got her. This was my chance. I stood up and volunteered. I told everyone how I would like to be Shalin's partner. The room got silent, but as I looked at her. It was the first time I saw her smile at me. We had so many funny moments throughout the practices and even the fashion show was a success. I kept teasing her always because it was cute when she showed me a side that she didn’t show anyone else. She even made me chocolates and helped me with school stuff. Unlike other girls, I knew she didn’t do it just because I was popular or a bit good-looking. When she cheered for me in my basketball games, I made sure that I also cheered for her in her soccer games. We became really good friends. I honestly didn't care what anyone thought. My popularity? talents? looks? none of those mattered if I didn't get her attention each day.

I also knew her private nickname "Rea", and she told me to call her that. When we had another class modeling event, my classmates were mocking and bullying her once more. I hated the fact that she was bullied for literally just being kind. I didn't know what's the history behind her. One thing that infuriated me, was when they used to call her "Igor." My heart broke as she hasn't done anything to deserve being called that. They mocked her looks, just because she was unique. She got picked out as the female model once more, and I made sure I volunteered to be the male model. Pretty much everyone thought that I was in it for the bullying, but little did they know that I craved this girl's attention. On the day of the event, she was so nervous. I understood that it was her first time in front of all the students in the school, this was definitely a bigger event than before. But when I just looked at her, I couldn't stop the words from my mouth. "You're beautiful", her smile was big. I knew that she was not just my crush.

The year went by so fast. I cherished every moment we had. I wouldn't say we were really close, since she seemed like the type to be very closed and introverted. Towards the end of the year, our class had a reflection time. We were tasked to state one person who has changed our life in front of the class. When it was my turn, I told the class, that it was Rea who had changed me. I even added that her generosity for the class is inspirational. However, the class laughed. They thought I was probably bullying and teasing Rea again. I meant every word of it. I looked at her while saying the words. She was flustered and she seemed nervous. I actually received a rumor saying that she also liked me, but I wasn't sure. This might be it. I had a feeling that she would finally open up to me. When it was Rea's turn, I was curious about what she would say. She first looked at me, her eyes looked broken. I don't know why, but it felt as if something was holding her back. The words that came out of her mouth broke my heart. She had mentioned my best friend's name.