Ezra
November and the first part of December passed much the same way that September and October had. While Josh did his best to bother and humiliate me, I stayed quiet, and any small moments where we seemed to be getting along for once were quickly ended as Josh realised his ‘mistake’.
And now, Josh was sitting on his bed, watching me as I finished up packing my bag to go home for the holidays.
“Aren’t you headed home?” I asked him, glancing over my shoulder as I tucked my seventh book into my backpack.
“Ah… no, actually.” He looked at his hands, frowning. “There’s stuff going on at home-- my big sister’s bringing her boyfriend home for the first time, for Christmas, and I… they didn’t want me there. Just my parents.”
“Oh.” I frowned at my bag.
“It’s fine, though, I’ve been home every other year,” he said, though his voice sounded sad.
“I guess.” I thought for a moment, then sighed and turned to him. “Hey, I don’t know much about Christmas, but… I could bring you something from Hanukkah? I don’t know if you’d be interested in that. My old roommate once brought me Christmas stuff when I couldn’t go home for the holidays, and it was fun to hear about it. Maybe I could do the same for you?”
He was silent for a moment, then…
“Yeah, that’d… that would be really nice. Thanks.”
“I’ll find you a Hanukkah sweater,” I joked, even though they were a thing, so it wasn’t that far-fetched to get him one.
He laughed. “Don’t wear yourself out about it. Anything’s fine.”
“Okay.”
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“Latkes!” I dropped the Tupperware in Josh’s lap, then swung my backpack off and set it by the bed.
He paused. “What?”
“Latkes.” I popped open the container. “They’re, like, potato pancakes, almost. It’s Jewish food.” I started eating one, and offered them to Josh, still wearing my puffy coat and beanie.
He took one, then took the container from me. “Take your coat off. You’ll burn up in here, they turned up the heat in the dorms.”
“Oh.” I stood again and unzipped my coat, letting it drop next to my backpack, but I left the beanie on as I rifled through the bag for my other gifts, most small but one larger than the others.
When I set the small, badly-wrapped packages in front of Josh, he gave me a curious look. “What are these?”
“Gifts.” I gave him a sheepish smile. “I was going to give you eight, for each night of Hanukkah, but I don’t know you well enough. There are three. And the latkes.”
“Oh.” He looked at the packages for a moment. “You didn’t have to.”
“I figured I’d try to make it as authentic as I could. I couldn’t bring a menorah here, but I wish I could’ve.” He frowned. “That would’ve been fun, lighting the candles.”
“What’s the deal with Hanukkah anyway?” Josh asked, opening the smallest gift. “What’s it celebrate? Christmas is the birth of Christ…”
“There’s an old story about a lantern with a day’s worth of oil burning for eight days,” I explained. “It saved a bunch of people. So Hanukkah is about the power and loving nature of God, technically. I think. I don’t really know, my family are kind of liberal Jews.”
He laughed. “It’s fine. Most people who celebrate Christmas don’t even think about the birth of Christ. Some of them read the bible verses about it, but most don’t.”
“We read the story, but don’t put much belief behind it,” I admitted.
He finally finished unwrapping the first gift, a handmade wooden toy, and examined it for a moment. “I know the name for this. It’s a… dreidel?”
“Yeah.” I nodded emphatically. “It’s used to play a game, but no one I know can really remember the rules, so we play dirty. I’ll teach you sometime.”
“Sounds like fun.” He started on the second gift, unwrapping it easily. “Gold coins?”
“Chocolate coins.” I halfway unwrapped one and put it in his open mouth. “I don’t remember why they’re such common gifts. It’s like the whole stocking thing on Christmas-- no one knows really where it started or why, but it’s a Hanukkah thing now.”
“Mm.” He ate the coin as he started on the last gift, the one I’d been most excited to give him. When he saw it, he burst out laughing. “It’s a Hanukkah sweater? Those exist?”
“Yep!” I laughed as well, hearty and more joyful that I had in a while.
He hugged it close to him. “Thanks.”
“Merry Christmas,” I said quietly.
He set the sweater aside, then reached out and wrapped me in a hug. “Happy Hanukkah.”
I paused for a moment, surprised, but returned his hug somewhat tentatively. “Thanks.”
He drew back, not completely letting go of me. “Maybe…” he started, then stopped, biting his lip. “Maybe… we could be friends. You’re… you’re not all bad, you know?”
I laughed. “‘Not all bad’. I’ll take it.”
He frowned. “I’m trying to be nice.”
“Sorry.” I gave him a small smile. “Yeah. Let’s be friends. You’re ‘not all bad’ either.”
He sighed. “I’m never living that down, am I?”
“Nope, never.” I laughed, then pulled him into another hug.
He relaxed into it, and I took a moment to appreciate this. Josh was being nice to me. Not tripping me, not insisting that I strip (which was weird, at the time), and not ignoring me. He was accepting my Hanukkah gifts, and being nice to me.
After that moment of reflection, I asked, “So, do you want to officially meet Mark and Tommy?”
“Sure.”
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As usual, their dorm room was unlocked, so I threw the door open without knocking.
Mark was in the process of unbuttoning Tommy’s shirt from where he was, down on his knees, and he sighed heavily.
Tommy frowned in the direction of me and Josh. “We really need to lock the door when we do this shit, Mark.”
“Agreed.” Mark stood again and gestured at Tommy. “Do your shirt back up, I’ll find something to put on.” He had already been shirtless when we came in.
I wasn't fazed by anything about the situation, but I didn’t miss the confusion on Josh’s face. I shrugged at him. “It’s Mark and Tommy. You get used to it.”
“Way to kill the mood, guys,” Mark grumbled, having gotten a t-shirt on and laid in his messy bed. He pulled Tommy down with him, per the usual, nuzzling his face into Tom’s side.
I landed on Tommy’s bed, inviting Josh to sit with me as I scooted up to the headboard.
“What’s he doing here?” Tommy asked me, not unkindly, as he gestured to Josh. “I thought you hated him.”
“He hated me, actually,” I corrected. I gestured to the Hanukkah sweater, which Josh had insisted that he ‘had to put on right now’. “We’re cool now, though. I brought him some Hanukkah cheer.”
“Oh. Sweet.” Tommy extended a hand to Josh, who was sitting awkwardly on the end of his very tidy bed. “I’m Thomas Smithy. The parasite is Markus Veranda.”
“Joshua Preston,” Josh replied, shaking his hand.
Mark rolled his eyes. “We know.”
“Mark, manners!” Tommy and I chided at the same time, half-subconsciously.
Josh’s brows creased in confusion. “You know me?”
“Yeah,” Mark muttered.
I poked Josh in the side with my socked foot. “It’s not important,” I promised.
“You’re sure?”
“Definitely.”
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From: ezra.a@gmail.com
To: abramov.family@gmail.com
Hey, guys.
So, it’s been a while. I didn’t write after October, until I came home for Hanukkah. I complained about Josh, then.
Josh is all right. He’s different from me, but we’re finally getting along, kinda. He said he wanted to be friends. We’re going to figure it out.
Love you.
Ezra
P.S. I’m going to see his football game tomorrow. I don’t know much about the sport, but I’m more going to see what his life’s like than I’m going to see anyone play. I’m really hoping it goes well.
I closed my computer. I need to remember to write more often. I’m slacking on my email-writing duties.
I glanced over at Josh, who was asleep. It was ten at night, but I’d felt the need to send the email before I went to bed. Had I ever seen Josh write home? I couldn’t think of anything…
I decided not to dwell on it.
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“I’ll be cold,” I’d said. “And all of my hoodies need a wash.”
Josh had handed me his letterman jacket without a second thought. “Wear this, then.”
It was hard to ignore the fact that every other person in the audience with a letterman jacket was the sweetheart of one of the football players, because the girl’s school nearby always came for games. Over the short blue plaid skirts and knee-high socks, the red and white of the jackets stood out.
I’d been grouped with the girls, at the front of the crowd, leaning against the rail to get the best view of the game.
One of the girls, a very pretty African-American girl who’d introduced herself as Anise, and her white friend Jessabelle flanked me, one on each side. Anise held onto my arm, watching as the players joked around on the field. The other team, on the other end of the field (who were from a mixed boys and girls prep school a few towns over), did the same thing.
“Whose jacket have you got, Ezra?” Jessabelle asked, scanning our players. “None of these guys seems like they’d be your boyfriend. By which I mean they don’t seem your type.”
“Ah-- I don’t… he’s not my boyfriend.” I stared at Josh, who was palling around with Kieran and Ian amiably. “Josh Preston is my roommate. He let me borrow his jacket.”
“Oh, shame. I was looking for a gay friend.”
Anise frowned at her friend. “That’s rude. Appreciate the friends you have, don’t go looking for new ones. And don’t be friends with someone just because of who they like.”
I ignored them both, watching as Kieran and Ian played keepaway with Josh’s helmet. He jumped for it, and once he’d gotten it back, he turned to smile triumphantly, right at me.
Once he saw who he was looking at, he waved.
The whistle to start the game blew, and in a spur-of-the-moment decision, I shouted, “Good luck, Josh!”
He laughed, and before he pulled his helmet back on, as he was backing onto the field, he yelled back, “Thanks, Ezra! We’ll definitely win now!”
“You’re sure he’s just your roommate?” Anise prodded playfully.
I rolled my eyes. “He’s just my roommate.” After a pause, though, I added, “I think.”
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