Waves of throbbing, nauseating pain pulsed through Finn's abdomen and he felt like his lunch was about to come back up. It felt like there was no end to his misery, nothing to break this cycle of torment. The thoughts running through Finn's mind were enough to get his heart racing faster- never mind the pain itself. He paused for a moment and took in a deep breath. If he could focus on something other than Alistaire, the pain would be easier to manage.

As he rested on his side, he winced and closed his eyes. His arms and legs were trembling as he attempted to get comfortable. Finn's eyes shifted heavenward as he nuzzled his cheek into his pillow, his vision now blurred with regretful tears. Today was a nightmare, and he just wanted it to end.

Hours into the night and into his sleep, a sharp noise awoke him- his eyes groggy as he tried to ignore the sound. Finn tugged his blanket overhead and mumbled softly to himself as he balled up in the center of his bed.

The plinking of pebbles against his window made him groan as he pushed himself to sit up. His shirt was thrown across the bed, and his pants were located to the left of his shoes. Blood was caked on his skin, and a few minor scrapes and abrasions decorated his otherwise flawless body.

Upon gazing outside the window, a pair of tired eyes aimlessly searched for his, their lips pressed firmly together. Intertwining his fingers together before unlocking his window, he felt a wave of desperate happiness wash over him.

"Can you come outside?" he mouthed, gesturing to the surrounding air.

His hair was a mess, brushed to the side in an attempt to look at least slightly decent. He managed to throw on a loose-fitting sweater and khakis, the bags underneath his eyes dragging down his appearance.

"You look tired," Embry joked as he adjusted his jacket. "Busy night?"

"Haha, very funny," he mocked dryly. Finn rocked on his heels and rubbed his hands over his arms, brushing his shoulder against Embry's coat in an attempt to steal some of his warmth. "Why are you up so late?" he asked between chattering teeth.

"Would you like my jacket?" He smirked and pulled out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket before removing his jacket and offering it to Finn. There was something about the blonde that intrigued him, he just didn't know what.

As he threw on Embry's coat, he nuzzled against the interior's fabric and sighed. Even though it smelled like cigarettes, he came to love the smell. "Where are we going?" Finn mumbled.

"My place," he grinned. "Is that a problem?"

Finn blushed and shook his head, evoking a playful chuckle from Embry's lips. Despite the constant waves of pain he felt in his abdomen, the heaviness in his heart seemed to outweigh his discomfort. Knowing he'd never be good enough for Embry or his family was a challenge, but he hoped everything would work out in the end.

"Nervous?"

He kept quiet and hugged his borrowed jacket close. "Not really..."

"Not really?" Embry raised an eyebrow.

"If Alistaire checks up on me and I'm not home... I'll be in trouble," Finn whispered. They'd made it a few blocks down the road, but he now desperately wanted to go home. The pit in his stomach was a mixture of guilt and fear as he yanked off Embry's jacket and gave it back. "This was a mistake, I'm sorry..." Finn lowered his head and felt his throat burn as he blurted out his sentence- the pain-stricken across Embry's face making his eyes well over with water.

"What was a mistake," he snapped back. "Me coming to see you, or your addiction to Alistaire?" He was beyond cold, his eyes lowered to a judgemental glare as he took his jacket back and slung it over his shoulder. Out of everything that could've come out of his mouth, he knew the harshness of his reply would make Finn cry, and he hated himself for saying it. The apology in his mind ached for release as he attempted to take back his words. He wanted to choke on them- suffocate.

The backhand across his face made him snap back to his senses as the pack of cigarettes in his hands dropped onto the concrete.

Finn was a sobbing mess, the purplish bags underneath his eyes furthering his broken look. His hand ached as it connected with the right side of Embry's face. "You don't know what love is!" he screamed in between shaky breaths. His body ached from earlier events, but his heart and hand felt like it'd been crushed.

Embry growled and grabbed Finn by his wrists, yanking him only inches away from his face. "Is that so?" he smirked. "Is that what you think?"

"Let me go!" he screamed and thrashed against Embry's grasp, the coldness in his stare making his heart race. It was that coldness that shoved a wedge in his relationship with Alistaire, and it was his carelessness that caused this heartbreak.

"So this is what you look like when-"

"Embry," he begged. "Let me go..."

Finn's face was hidden in the sleeve of his sweater as he cried, the harshness in Embry's tone reduced to an apologetic mumble as he released Finn's wrists. "Finn, I-"

"Don't worry about it," he interjected. Stooping down to pick up the pack of cigarettes he'd dropped, Finn tucked them in Embry's pocket and gave him a halfhearted smile before bidding him a good night.

He stripped himself of his clothes and winced as the fabric in his sweater pulled against his scabs. With his clothes thrown into the laundry hamper, he rubbed heavy eyes and slipped into bed, beside Alistaire.

"Finally decided to join me?" he mumbled underneath his breath. His nose was buried into Finn's hair as he hooked an arm around his waist, his waist pressed into Finn's rear.

"... I couldn't sleep," he lied, nesting his head into his pillow as he moved, he wiggled his hips. "I figured you could help me."

"In what kind of way?" he chuckled.

If he wasn't awake from Finn's statement, the being in his boxers surely was. Finn blushed and flipped over on his side to face Alistaire, letting out a faint yawn.

He sat up and ran his fingers through his hair, tugging Finn into his lap. "Sleepy?"

His blonde hair was pressed into the brunette's chest as he nodded, rubbing his drowsy eyes. "Mhn."

"Can I kiss you?" Alistaire purred in his ear, dancing his fingertips along the contour of Finn's arms.

Even in the moonlight, he could see the cockiness beaming from his boyfriend's face. As much as he wanted to shove Alistaire away, he nodded and blushed. Whichever side of Alistaire this was, he enjoyed its company.

Grabbing a hold of Finn's chin, he chuckled and dipped his head to press their lips together. Finn's lips felt like velvet against his as their lips interlocked. As he pulled away, Alistaire blushed and swiped his thumb along Finn's bottom lip.

Though their kiss was tender, Finn couldn't help but focus on the bitterness that lingered afterward. He wanted his first kiss to be taken by Embry, but tonight had proven that there could be nothing between them. He wrapped his arms hesitantly around Alistaire's neck, clasping his hands together. "Is that it?" he teased.

"Did you want more?" Alistaire arched an eyebrow quizzingly as he gripped both sides of Finn's waist.

"Maybe," he pouted. He didn't care what he did at this point, his main focus was getting Embry off his mind. "Am I allowed to have more?"

"What's gotten into you?" he chuckled.

He bit his tongue and fixed his gaze on the nightstand to his left, a chill running down his spine as Alistaire's fingers trailed along his skin. "Nothing... Sorry," he whispered.

"Am I allowed to touch you?" Alistaire kissed Finn's forehead and slowly maneuvered his hands lower, caressing the blonde's inner thighs.

A stifled moan escaped his lips as he shifted against Alistaire's waist, his face red with embarrassment. It'd been a while since he'd even remotely thought about doing something like this with him, but he needed to drown out all thoughts of Embry. Finn nodded and buried his face in Alistaire's chest as he felt a cool hand grasp the stiffened rod between his thighs.

"Sit up a little," he instructed. His eyes were focused on Finn's as he did as he was told. He tugged down his lover's boxers and chuckled as he tried to shield his crotch. "None of that," he groaned. "Move your hands."

"Alistaire..." his hands shook as the brunette grabbed his wrists and placed them to his sides.

"Stay still..." he mumbled.

"I'm not in the mood..." Finn lied and felt another moan beckon to be released as Alistaire began stroking him.

"You're lying." he grinned. He was already slick, the stickiness on his fingers evidence of his claim. He massaged his thumb into the tip of Finn's shaft and licked the liquid off with a playful grin.

"That's gross!" Finn swatted at his hands and blushed. "What are you doing?"

"Did I say you were allowed to move?"

He was beyond modified, the heat in his face adding a lustful glow to his body language. Finn shielded his face and closed his eyes as Alistaire continued to stroke his length. The naughty squishes of noise between his ragged breaths in the night made his toes curl, and the only person behind his eyelids was Alistaire.

He was silent as he pleasured the blonde, his eyes pinned on his lover's lips. As Finn whimpered his name, he felt the tent in his boxers harden further. "Finn," he mumbled. "Are you close?"

He was beyond words at this point, a nod of his head the most he could muster up for a response. His hips swiveled against the strokes supplied by Alistaire, and his arms were hooked around his neck. Another desperate kiss was forced against Alistaire's lips as he drew closer. "I'm gonna-" he whimpered.

The husky groan that Alistaire released in his ear sent him over the edge, the waves of his orgasm making him spasm against his boyfriend's chest.

"Mm, that was oddly fast," he joked. "You're out of practice."

He slumped against Alistaire's chest and hugged around his waist, sucking in a sharp breath as he tried to relax. Embry was officially out of his mind, locked away and buried somewhere he'd never look. Alistaire's arms were hooked around his waist as his eyes fluttered shut, another lazy kiss to his forehead leaving him to drift off to sleep.

With his nose buried in Finn's hair, he groaned as he pulled himself from his boxers, a muffled gasp sounding in the silence as his stomach tightened. His manhood ached to be touched, but he didn't want to disturb Finn. "Fuck.." he cursed. Gently tossing him aside, he covered him with his blanket and pushed himself out of bed. It was about time he visited an old friend.