The next day I go to another training session with Gala, or rather, a lecture on specific kinds of blades and how to use them without making a complete fool of myself, which I then proceed to do when she asks me to go through some basic drills for an hour. Fighting was never something I had to worry about before being pulled into this mess, and I’m paying for that lack of knowledge now with muscle pain and constantly being smacked into the mat.

“I don’t think I’m ever going to get this,” I say as Gala once again knocks me on my ass.

“Of course you will. Success doesn’t come overnight, and you’re already improving. So get up and let’s go again,” she says with no mercy in her expression.

I get up, picking up the tactical knife I’m practicing with before getting back into my combat stance. Feet shoulder-width apart, one foot slightly ahead and lowered down to protect my abdomen, and all the important stuff there. Gala stands at the ready, beckoning me forward to start the sparring match. I rush her, trying to hit a slight opening in her defences on her side, but she grabs the wrist holding the knife and slams me down face-first, which hurts like a bitch.

“You’re making it too obvious what you’re going to do. If you are that open about your moves, you’re the one that’s going to end up dead,” Gala says directly into my ear. Which is rather uncomfortable, actually. I wiggle into a sitting position once she gets off me and try to catch my breath.

Ellery pokes his stupid, smug face in to check on us and I can’t help but notice Gala’s faint blush and her flustered speech when she notices him and assures him that all is going well with the training session. Hmmm… this is an interesting development. Looks like sarcastic, interrogating, merciless Gala has a crush. Now, what to do? What to do?

As soon as the door shuts behind Ellery I give Gala a sly smile. “Ellery’s rather attractive isn’t he, Gala?” Well not to me, but that’s not what’s important here.

“I have no clue what you’re talking about.” Gala fixes her most intimidating glare at me, but I’m far too interested in entertainment to care. Right now she’s just given herself away with the way-too-quick abject denial. She really should stop blushing if she expects me to believe her.

“Does he know you like him?” I ask.

“Who says I like him?”

“You’re obvious. Now, does he know?”

“No. And I’m not telling him either so you can stop now.”

Well, that just won’t do. “You’re playing safe aren’t you? If you don’t say anything, you don’t ruin what you have right now. Which is a whole lot of nothing. He doesn’t see you right now and he never will if you keep quiet.”

“Oh, and you’re the expert on taking risks now, are you?” She scoffs at me.

“Of course I am. I wouldn’t have survived this long without taking some risks. I’ll do whatever it takes to get what I want. Sometimes, that involves risk. Nothing good in life ever comes easy, right?”

As I’m saying that I remember my worst gamble, one I hadn’t even thought through and feel like a fucking hypocrite. But that was a completely different situation based on my stupidity. The risk Gala’s taking won’t hurt anyone, and I’m almost sure she'll succeed anyways.

Luckily Gala didn’t seem to notice my moment of hesitation as she tried to find a counterargument.

Finally she comes up with, “What you do has no bearing in my life, and it shouldn’t.”

“Which means it’s your own fault that you’re alone while I have a boyfriend.” Though that wasn’t so much a risk as my pathetic floundering and awkwardness that led to that event.

She frowns at me so I just leave the point with, “You’ll never know unless you try, so if you’re okay with living with that go right on ahead. But if you want a real shot with him you’re going to have to say something.”

“I’ll think about it,” she says grudgingly.

“That’s all I ask.”

After that conversation our training session was declared over, so we cleaned up and I went home to eat supper. When our meal is eaten and Derek once again retreats to his solitude, I curl up with Phoenix on the couch, lost in thought.

“Does it make me a bad person if I don’t feel attached to this place?” I ask. “We’ve been here for months and yet I wouldn’t care if we left tomorrow.”

Phoenix takes a moment to answer, probably thrown by my out of the blue question. I feel an odd urge to bite my nails as I wait, and I curl my hands into fists to prevent it. Finally he says, “I wouldn’t say that. After all, we’re only here for a limited amount of time anyways.”

“How long do you usually stay in a world?”

“A few weeks, maybe months. Occasionally I can last a year or more, but for the most part it gets tedious during those. The lives we’re placed in tend to be dangerous for some reason or another. I don’t know if that’s intentional, but it’s the case most of the time.”

He pauses for a moment before saying, “I don’t usually want to get involved in the worlds, but when it’s situations that I might make a difference, improve things, I can’t help but want to at least try. It just hurts when I have to leave before I know if my actions had any impact.”

I snuggle further into his side as he talks. I know he has a big heart, but I hadn’t realized why he would do anything at all. Maybe one day I’ll be able to understand that about him.

“I don’t know if I would ever do something like that.”

He kisses my forehead affectionately. “You’re doing it right now by helping me.”

We sit like that for hours, talking and whiling the night away. A feeling of contentment settles over me as I enjoy the peacefulness of the evening, and even more so the company I have. The man I love.

“It’s getting late. We should head to bed soon,” Phoenix says as he gets up from the couch.

“I don’t want to just yet.”

He gives me an indulging smile and settles back down next to me, a look of warmth in his dark eyes. Could that be love?

It probably is. At least, it should be. But I’ll never find out if I don’t say anything. Phoenix can be shy about the oddest things, but is saying how he feels one of them? Is this a risk I want to take? But then, I already know the answer to that.

I look into his warm, brown eyes, so kind and giving, just like him. “I love you.”

His eyes widen in shock for a few seconds, then start to get a little misty as he says, “I love you too.”

He pulls me into a kiss that quickly goes from sweet to passionate. When he gets up, I follow him, still wrapped around him as we head to his room and fall on the bed.

This is undoubtedly the best risk I’ve ever taken.