A silence fell between us. Within, the soft irregular thumps were once again audible while the same guttural screech supported it. As I listened, it finally clicked. The reason I, nor Air, nor Earth had felt anger. Fire held it all. She held it all and was acting upon it. She was in pain. Still I felt my heart rate pick up again. If Earth had closed this off, how dangerous was Fire? I swallowed at the thought. I wasn't certain what was more frightening. The thought of facing the clearly enraged fire version of ourselves, remaining here forever or another trip back through the dark. None were really alluring prospects, but those were the only options I could think of. The guttural screech pitched shortly, causing my heart to leap again. And though I felt the same fear as before, something else was slowly overpowering it. I could hear her pain. Out of all of us, she'd suffered the most probably. The least I could do was confront her.
"So that's how it is. We abandon someone to protect ourselves?" I said.
The glare levelled at me caused a shiver to go down my spine. Still I held my ground and glared back. I needed to hear it. She placed her hands on her hips.
"Listen, it's not just her. What if, after you miraculously survived her, we return? We'll have to face everyone again. We can't do that. We're not strong enough. Here, I can keep us safe."
"You aren't keeping us safe," I said. Her eyebrows rose, but I didn't give her a chance to argue. Words formed automatically. I didn't know where they came from, but with every syllable I believed more and more in the things I said. "You are hurting us. You know, just as well as I do, that we want to get back. Mom, dad, Max and grandma are waiting for us. We want to see them."
She pressed her lips together, but her arms had left her hips. Right now they hung helplessly next to her, which I took as an encouragement.
"We're maybe not strong enough to face everything out there. But we can't stay here. Here we'll never be as strong as you want us to be."
I took a deep breath and placed my hand on the stone wall behind me. It was warmer than I expected. The noise had again subsided.
"Besides. Right now, you're abandoning us as well," I said while patting the wall.
Here I saw her clench her jaw. She looked from me to the wall. It was the first time I could read her face. It was clear she was looking for a way to argue. For a way to deny my request. The way her eyes became wider, told me she wasn't finding one. I pushed down the small smile I felt growing. I'd rather not give her a reason to deny me, however unreasonable it would be.
"She is unhinged," she said.
I nodded, the knot in my stomach tightening. "I figured."
"Don't you think she'll kill us?" she said.
I looked back at the wall. Maybe Fire knew what was happening or maybe it was a coincidence, but the sounds of wanton destruction were still out. I balled the hand that I'd placed on the wall.
"I don't think she would do that. Just like I don't think you want to keep us locked away." Somehow I believed my words. I had to, or else I wouldn't have a reason to continue. I couldn't admit I was terrified I was wrong. If I did, I would be locked away forever.
As I said that, I looked again in her eyes. She was no longer looking down on me. Instead, she had her shoulders slightly risen up as she found my gaze.
"At least let me come with you," she said. "I can protect us if she goes beyond your expectations."
I smiled and held out my hand. "Fair enough."
She grabbed a hold of it and I felt the same familiar sensation as I had when the air core and I merged. Only instead of an abundance of light, I saw the crystals all started to burst in tiny shards, darkening the place quickly. Earth disappeared and as the large wall that separated us from Fire started to become undone, I felt strangely calm. There was still the anticipation of before - I could feel the knot clearly in my stomach - but it wasn't firing off into anxiety. Instead it kept brimming just below the surface, preparing me to sprint the moment things went south.
The wall crumbled before my eyes, but before the darkness of the cave even had a chance of enveloping me, a fire ball shot towards me. I immediately jumped out of the way as it veered off course and exploded somewhere behind me. Heat swept over me and when I looked up, I saw flames. Some high enough to scorch the ceiling, while others weren't more than a campfire. However, through the blaze I saw pockets of sunlight. Whatever Fire did here, it caused the cave to crack and show a path to the outside. Amidst it all stood another version of myself. This time with charred clothes and with long flames substituting for my hair. Each hand held a fireball and her face was contorted in a snarl. I shivered as I quickly crawled up.
"Finally done hiding, you coward?" she yelled at me. Her voice was raw and deeper, as if even yelling at me caused her pain in a way.
"I wasn't," I tried, before another fireball was lobbed my way.
My hands moved before I took notice of it. An earthen wall erected between us, taking the impact of the attack. I muttered a thank you to myself before lowering it again, seeing Fire still standing with one other fireball at the ready.
"Cal..."
"Don't you dare say those words!" she bellowed at me. "I am done being calm. They hurt us for far too long! You've benched me every single time! Not today! They destroyed Mousey! The least you can let me do is destroy them."
I was prepared for another fireball my way. Instead she lobbed it into the sea of fire, where two human like fire figures stood. A small explosion followed, creating another hole to the outside world. I swallowed. Earth hadn't been joking - not that I thought she had the capability to do that - when she said Fire was dangerous. I honestly couldn't remember a time when I'd been angry, let alone this angry.
"You've proven quite the talker. Can you talk her down as well?"
It was the same voice as before. Both Fire and I reacted to it. I by staring up, Fire by blasting at the ceiling. I was certain I heard it snicker in response to our reactions. We crossed gazes again and it was clear that Fire was very much like Earth when it came to focus. Despite the brief interruption, her anger was now once again completely focussed on me. I tried raising my hands as a sign of peace, but that only pissed her off more.
She yelled again, the same raw screech I'd picked up before. A large bell of fire surrounded her and pushed out. It quickly came to envelope me, but I pushed back with air. The flames flickered dangerously around me, the heat making me sweat. My heart rate was going up and the fear I was slowly growing accustomed to came back. Only this time it was more controlled. Tears still sprang in my eyes, but I didn't run. Mind you, I wanted to. The only reason I didn't, was because I saw my tears mirrored in the eyes of Fire. They were fleeting, as they quickly sizzled out, but I could see them as she looked at me again. So instead of running, I decided to be bold. Still in the back of my mind I was cursing myself when a new array of fireballs were lobbed my way. I had to take a sprint, jumping and rolling out of the reach of these incredibly deadly projectiles. Right now I really wished my potentials had to at the very least draw a circle. That way it would give me some time to think. This was ridiculous. And she was growing smarter. She shot two at the same time, one to block my path and the other right at me. My forward momentum nearly caused me to fall into the first blast. My instinctive reaction of lifting my arms to cushion the impact caused a slab of stone to erect from the ground, taking the blast instead. I could only take a deep breathe in relief when that same guttural screech came up. More fire was shot my way, and all I could do was hunch behind my slab of stone. The heat was rising around me and even the stone started to become uncomfortably warm. I had to do something and fast.
Telling her to calm down was clearly a way to fuel her flames. She had to calm down for me to talk to her. She was clearly not in the mood to listen to reason. Another option was to make a break for it. There were pockets of natural light behind her. Those had to be openings to the world outside. If I managed to stay alive for long enough, I could perhaps get out of this hallucination. Despite the risks, it was most definitely the safest of my options. However, just thinking about it caused bile to come up. I'd just accused Earth of abandoning us. Now I wanted to do the same. I couldn't do that. That thought alone burst my illusion that I ever had a choice to begin with.
She howled again, pausing her onslaught on my defences. I kept an eye out in case she came around. I could hear her heavy raspy breathing, before another howl ripped through the air. Her howls resonated within me. I couldn't remember a time I'd ever been this angry. I always cooled down before it got this bad. No, that wasn't true. Max had once riled me up enough for me to be like this. It had been incredibly short lived. It had been the first and only time I'd ever hurt someone. A new barrage of fireballs collided against my wall, this time cracking it behind me. I had to think of something fast, or I'd be the second person to have been hurt by myself. I shook my last thought. I couldn't use this confusion right now. I had to find something to snap Fire out of this. The more I thought about it, the more my gut turned on itself. There was only one option and I really didn't like it. A part of me was still trying to coax me into running. I would lie if I said that didn't feel like the best thing to do. Tears welled up. I didn't want to do this. I wanted to be home. Fuck the whole ritual. I never should have tried it.
The top of my defences crumbled down, hitting me hard on my head. I groaned in pain. I was wrong. Fire was out for blood and she didn't care it was mine. Why should I care about her? Tears started to stream down my cheeks, both in pain as in fear. The blasts kept on going and a maniacal sort of laughter started to echo in the cave. I felt more of the rubble coming down on me. I covered my head to avoid it from hitting me like before. I wasn't going to get out. Not without getting past her. She wouldn't allow it. Was I going to allow her to punish me for the things I never did? Why should I take her hatred when it is meant for the outside world? You know what? Fuck her! I would not stand for this. If she wanted a fight, she could have one. It was clear to me why I'd always kept her under control. And I would remind her of that.
At the sound of the next barrage, I rolled away from the earthen slab. There wasn't much left of it and when I moved, so did her attacks. I used that moment to send the remainders of the slab right at her. I felt the earth magic wash over me as I directed it all towards the slab. Brushing the ground with my fingertips, I flicked it towards Fire. Her maniacal laughter was cut short when the slab hit her full force. She was knocked onto the ground with a groan. The fireballs died out and I managed to catch my breath for a few sands. I hadn't hit her hard enough, for she stood up rather quickly. A small trial of blood trickled down her face. I also didn't calm her down. I hadn't known it was possible, but I'd made her even more livid than she already was.
The ground started to heat up below me. She lifted her arms and I only had a fracture of a sand to jump away. A pillar of fire rose up, charring my left foot in the process. I yelled out, grabbing for my foot which felt like it was glowing on its own. I heard her yell out in victory. I only fought the tears while focussing on my foot. I felt the air magic wash through me, enveloping my burnt foot in a ball of air. It cooled it down considerably, turning the pain quickly in a dull throbbing. The moment I felt the reprieve, I immediately turned to Fire and used the same air magic to knock the feet from underneath her. She tried to jump out of the way, but unfortunately for her that meant going into the air, where I had free reign in this world. I used my magic to grab a hold of her, holding her aloft and forcing her arms apart. She struggled against it, but she couldn't break out of it. Which was what I needed. She had nowhere to go. No way to hurt me.
I hopped towards her, tentatively testing whether or not I could use the air ball around my foot to walk. She stopped her struggling the moment I came into her view. I nearly miss stepped. The pure hatred she had for me felt hotter than any attack she'd thrown. I halted, my body shaking at the intensity of her gaze. I was uncertain whether I wanted to continue. I didn't want to show her that she scared me. I didn't want her think I was weak. I swallowed and tried to stop my body from trembling. I reached out, slowly, when Fire replied with one final gambit of her own.
A new howl came from her, filled with the same intense anger as her gaze. I felt the air around me heat up and I realised what she was about to do. A bell of fire formed around her, heating the air that bound her enough to go up and release her. The bell expanded at a rapid pace. The heat increased and came closer. The orb of air around my foot struggled to remain as the wall of flames came closer. I wouldn't get away in time. A new sensation washed through me, one I didn't have the time for to even properly register. Instead I immediately casted it out, hoping that whatever element I was calling on, would save me from this blast. I yelled out in exertion. I wasn't going to sit back and let her kill me. If Air couldn't confuse me and Earth couldn't capture me, then Fire would fail as well. I got to decide what would happen. I controlled them and they did not control me.
Sparks flew from my hands. These quickly latched onto the fire bubble, creating stream of lightning from my fingertips to my fiery doom. Yet, I felt no resistance. Instead I felt a warmth entering me through my hands, easing the pain in my foot and giving me the energy I'd lost in my fight. The fire bubble started to dissipate, with Fire staring at me. Her hair no longer flared uncontrollably, but had doused to a controllable version, where only the tips of her hair were smouldering like embers. The pyres around us had started to smoulder as well. Her face had paled and now it was her trembling as my lightning reached her. She didn't convulse. Instead she started to breathe with more difficulty. I stopped my attack. I felt as great as I'd done when I first came to this place. Maybe even better. And definitely capable of keeping Fire under control.
Comments (0)
See all