My body felt like a hollowed-out carcass, filled to the neck with vermin, tonight. The words I spoke were used as ammunition, and my actions were filled with defeat. All it took was a lone owl to sweep down and scare away the vermin, and peck out the unpleasantries that used my husk as shelter. If I knew no better, I would say that it didn’t benefit him at all.

All I know for sure is, he made me feel refreshed before his departure.

I swept the entirety of the apartment and found some more missing clothes, dug through my coat pockets and found the pair of glasses I wore a few weeks ago, and spotted a roll of paper towels I knew I had in the apartment, on top of the refrigerator. Did the dishes, took a quick shower just for fun, and now I’m in a comfy pair of blue-and-white pinstripe sweatpants and a white undershirt.

Contacts out, television on: time to go through my video game backlog.

I slip over to the couch underneath the television and pull open my drawer of games. Few platformers, a handful of hack-and-slashes, a few beat-em-ups… Ah, now here’s an RPG that I haven’t played in a long while: Dragon’s Maw.

Dragon’s Maw, the first RPG I played, and one in which accrued a cult following. Far better RPGs have come out before and after this one, but there is charm behind the compact open world, the cheesy plot, and the wide varieties of love interests that you could choose from.

And thank goodness it isn’t all set in a damn desert, like the sixth installment of The Seven Crystals was. Huge open world and tons to do, but travelling place to place through large stretches of dry root forests just to see the same-looking towns and caves… the charm wore off after a hundred hours of min-maxing and task completion.

I pop in the game and toss the television remote into the drawer, pulling out my game controller: smooth and black with a semi-textured grip. I grab the back of my futon bed and pull it into couch mode, then I plop my ass right down. When was the last time that I even played video games last, and why did I stop playing them after work?

Game gets selected and after a few developer screens, I am gifted a flood of memories, from a mere orchestral arrangement accompanied by a choir, chanting in an ancient tongue. Thoughts of parading around a lush environment with my companions, slaying enemies with my mighty lance, falling in love with a merchant who, like me, had a troubled home life-- they all felt bittersweet. This game allowed me to escape and empathize with its people instead of getting hung up in my own personal affairs.

When the main menu theme hushes and the secondary, 30 second loop comes on, I finally hit the “Continue Game” button.

I am greeted by my berzerker General Ibex, donned in wraps upon wraps of bandages, from fists to ankles, a padded gambeson underneath crystalline plate armor, pauldrons in the shape of wyrms, and woven sandals. He has a strong jawline, piercing green eyes, and large, hooked ivory horns adorned with an assortment of chains and bangles. He has black braids, and pearlescent bronze skin. He holds his shield proudly by his side, and his axe at the ready.

He stood atop a cliffside that gave him-- and me-- a gorgeous view of the capital: forest stretches out from underneath him, a drake hides stealthily in the brushes, harpies soar high above the canopies, and traveling caravans walk the roads in perfect formation.

The capital is heavily fortified with large walls stretching around it. The architecture is full of domes and arches, and although you can’t make out all of the color details from this distance, the walls of the buildings are all a nice, sandy orange. Much better than the typical grey you see in games with walled-in cities and castles. Even if I do hate the multitude of deserts that TSC 6 has, the cities in Dragon’s Maw are all so colorful and vibrant-- the desert city included.

It takes me a few minutes to get used to the controls again, but once I get going the muscle memory kicks in hard. The senseless violence against the always-aggressive mobs, who bother me whether I am minding my own business or not, the timed trials that pop up every time I enter an area with a mini-boss, it all feels so refreshingly familiar. Before I know it, I can deftly dodge some of the larger enemies in the game.

All right, time to go meet my old companions.

I go to a close-by encampment, knowing that my companions would be there… and I am near-instantly hit with a gut-dropping experience.

Lithe and tall frame, long, blond hair, blue eyes, ochre skin… though, like me, my companion sports horns atop their head-- only these are more-so in the shape of antlers than traditional cones. My main partner character: Whistlequill, the archer. They wear the most ornate pair of light armor that I could manage to drop from a Sky-vern-- blue with golden flecks--, plate vambraces, leather boots, and a bow-and-quiver set that matches that of the armor. When they meet eyes with my player character, they bound over and wave.

“Matcha!” they cheer, grinning with eyes closed. Their dual set of elongated canines cutely jut out from the top of their mouth. The way this game zooms in on your companions when they come into frame doesn’t normally disorient me in this way, but the sheer coincidence of them looking like Ke’lan… it’s throwing me all sorts of ways.

Nevertheless, with my main companion and two hirees-- a stout, pirate-looking caster named Waglen and a golem shield-born named Shi’era-- I go back out on my adventure.

With a full party of four, mowing down enemies is an absolute breeze. Shi’era taunts enemies and absorbs the brunt of the attacks head-on, Waglen boosts me so I can jump in with Shi’era, axes swinging, and Whistlequill attacks from afar, calling out weak points whenever their arrows popped one wide open. After boosting everyone, Waglen boosts himself and drops down debilitating amounts of damage to anyone who dares step into his long-range casts.

Once I figure out everyone’s strengths and weaknesses once more, I summon a Great Wyvern and fly my party and I to the so-called “big kid” areas, an archipelago far off the mainland. Proper enemy scaling, tons of debilitations, and the scant possibility of party-wiping cheap shots is just the kind of thrill I get into. The fact that this island looks like a combination of an abandoned graveyard and a dilapidated city just sells the brutal atmosphere of this area.

I get immediately lost in the game. Minutes turn into hours. Beasts constantly threaten our existences. Party members fall and revive. Many battles are won and lost, constant ‘game over’s are continued, and level ups are scattered amongst my main companion and I every so often. No rare or important loot is dropped during my session, but I don’t care; I’m having fun.

This continues throughout the night, and I eventually end up playing this game until I eventually pass out, controller in hand, at 5 o'clock in the morning.