I fidgeted when I heard a knock on the door. I was crying for I don't know how long. I just don't care.

"Darryl?" Came the voice from outside. It took her to call me again before I recognize that it was Leonor on the other side. "Dinner is ready."

"I-I'll pass. I'm not hungry." I told her.

"But Mr. Sanders asked for your presence." She said.

Blue... I closed my eyes again and hugged myself even more.

"Just tell him I'm not hungry. Whatever he wants me to do, he can just text me." I just don't want to see him yet. I can't stand it.

"Okay." Leonor answered. I felt mad at myself. She is not to be treated that way. She was so friendly with me.

I sighed.

It would be very creepy if a person has a blank mind because that isn't normal. But I tell you that is what exactly my mind is now. It was numb.

My tears must have been emptied because they stopped falling. But the pain was still there. It will take time to ebb away. I hope not for long.

I closed my eyes but I felt the phone buzzed.

'Don't let the food wait Darryl or I'll pick you up myself.' Blue's text.

I stared at it for a moment before I hurried to the bathroom. I looked horrible. I splashed some water and thankfully, the redness of my eyes disappeared though not all but it looked better.

I head down the dining room. I saw Blue laughing with the girl. Wait, what is she doing here? They all turned to look at me, including Leonor. I shook my head.

"What took you so long?" I heard Blue.

I swallowed. His voice was so cold. "I-I was not planning to eat dinner because I'm not hungry."

"That's nonsense." He said and ordered me to sit down. "By the way, I would like you to meet Claire my ex." He said that made me look up.

"But that will change right?" She asked to Blue who just smiled in return.

"Hey." I greeted and smiled but I know it didn't reach my eyes because I know exactly what's in there.

Regret. Pain. Envy. Anger for myself.

"HI." She said and smiled. And I swear she has a beauty. Her slightly tanned skin made her cheek bones more noticeable. She has long brown hair and her lashes were so long.

If not with the pain I was feeling now, I would agree that she passed my standards for Blue. But the tide has turned, I now envy her.

We started eating but I felt sick. I can't take it anymore with Blue looking her like nobody else is in the room. Can't he wait till we finished dinner?

I concentrated on my plate but their snickers get through me. Sh*t. I pushed my plate and stood. "I'm done. Excuse me." I uttered.

"Wait. I have something to tell you." Blue said and motioned me to follow him away from ear shot.

I just shook my head. I can't look his eyes-his beautiful blue eyes. I don*t want him to see through me.

"Claire will be staying here for good. She will be staying in your room so I want you to transfer on one of the guest rooms. Pick whichever you want."

I just nodded and walked away.

She was staying here for good. I repeated to myself. So she was his ex huh. Good for them.

I guess he won't be needing me anymore. At this time I wish I'm still a trolley boy at S tower and not his PA. I could deal with Isadora's shrill voice everyday than to deal with this pain.

Damn you Darryl! I mentally slapped myself.

I headed to the closet. I stared at it for a moment as I remembered last night. I sighed.

What could've happened if I told him I still love him? What could've happened?

Maybe he doesn't really love me anymore and what I saw was all imagination. Maybe he was just asking.

'But you felt it.' My subconscious disagreed.

Right. I felt it but just denied it. And now I'm facing the consequences.

I took all my things and head out the room. I saw them going inside Blue's study. And this masochist side of me made me stood there and watched them kissed as they closed the door behind them.

Are they making out?

Ugh. That wouldn't take a genius to answer. It's obvious.

I headed towards the first guest room. At least the size was cozy and just right not like the room I recently.

But you know what's lacking? An express door towards Blue's room. I sighed.

Why would I think about that now? I only used it once. And I'll never be able to use it again.

I lie on the bed and embraced myself. I refused the thoughts about what Blue and Claire will be doing right now but it was so stubborn and just kept coming.

And my tears kept coming too and I sobbed. The f*! I never thought it will hurt this much!

...

Pretending not to love him was easy but pretending while seeing him with Claire took out the enthusiasm from me.

I looked at them as they ate breakfast together beside the pool. I should be the one stirring that coffee for him. I should be the one holding that planner and reading his itineraries and activities but Claire insisted.

I guess I really am not needed anymore. I had to talk to him so that I could get away from here. It's annoying because every time I do, my eyes threaten.

I didn't ride with him anymore. Claire was now the one on his side inside that Chevy.

I felt antsy without something to do because apparently, Claire took my job.

I went to his office. "Excuse me." I uttered.

Blue looked up and then looked down again. "What is it?"

I looked around and was thankful that Claire wasn't in sight. "I uh, would like to ask you if I still have something to do here because it gets me on my nerves to be just sitting around doing nothing."

"Do whatever you want." He said.

I swallowed. Okay, this is it. "I want to resign from here." I said that had him stopped from what he's doing.

He looked at me. "You're not resigning Darryl." He said and went back to whatever he's doing.

"But I have no job here anymore, what's in here for me?"

"Don't worry, you still will have your salary, no deductions." He said.

Ugh. What is he thinking? That I'm just after the salary, well excuse me to that.

"No, I just can't stand receiving something when I'm just here doing nothing." I said.

He looked up again. "You really want to have something to do?" He asked.

"No, I want to resign." I said.

"No. I said no. And it will stay no." He said.

He is making this difficult. "Fine, give me a job." I said.

Before he could answer, Claire went inside with her oh so intimidating looks. She was stirring his coffee again. He smiled at her.

I looked away from them because I can't stand seeing him smile at others. especially to a beautiful woman like Claire.

Yeah, I'm pathetic and hopeless.

"Here's your job, McKinley." His voice made me look up.

He handed me an envelope labeled 'MERGER.'

"I want you to bring that to Mr. Lewis and tell him that I approved it." He said.

Who the hell is this Mr. Lewis? Does Blue know that I'm not good at this?

Ugh. But this is better than to stay here all day and watched the two of them.

Just the thought make the corners of my eyes water again.

I exited the door without a word.