In the past few days I’d done pretty well, considering. School had been horrible. Liam, Sally and Jerry had been there for me as usual, but even they had been doubting me at least a little bit.

Matt, my lovely beautiful Matt had forsaken me, hit me in the face. And now, to add to the pain and despair I already felt, he told the entire school about Chris. Well, probably he told a couple of people and they told the rest. But still… Word on the campus was that I was a golddigger.

Being hated by everyone for the last couple of weeks, he even tried to spin the story in his favour, saying I was the one that fucked us up by getting marked by a filthy rich cougar. 

He had seen the two Teslas and had brewed up something devious. My friends obviously didn’t believe him, since they knew me and my love for Matt well enough to establish the right order of things, but they were still suspicious about my motive for the current situation.

I didn’t have the guts to tell them what really happened. I was too ashamed of myself to come out and say it, so I made Matt look ridiculous by denying it all.

All except the earlier scene in front of Matt’s house. The fact that he beat me up after I confronted Adam (I left out the bit where I tried to strangle him) was the only thing I told them, which ironically was the only thing that he had left out. 

The fact that I had skipped my meds, got myself marked... I denied everything, pointing at me still wearing my collar as proof. 

I even said that Chris was my aunt, that there was only ONE Tesla and yes, I got to drive it. I elaborated on that, since it was the only nice part of the story that was actually true.

Matt got the worst of it, as he should, being a dick and all. 

Everyone KNEW the story of him and Adam to be true, since they were getting married out of the blue. And everyone close to us knew we had been planning on going official for years. So they chose my side again. After I dissipated the golddigger rumours, it wasn’t just our friends shat shunned him. Everyone did. And he didn’t take it well: he hadn’t been at campus since last week.

Fuck him, I thought. But my heart broke all over again seeing him hurt like that. Lost and alone. It was his own fault, but somehow I still loved him, and his pain was mine.

Fated mates… I had really believed that. But however romantic and sweet that was, the idea of us belonging together had now turned sour. We may have been fated, but we weren’t mates. Him and Adam were. Me and Chris. Nothing romantic about that.

Secretly, but with everything I had, I hoped we still had a chance. That, if we really were fated, he would abandon Adam and pick me. Be with me instead. 

The future we foresaw together couldn’t just have vanished into thin air. Maybe it was still there. Maybe everything had been too easy on us so far and this was just the bump in the road that couples faced in a romantic love story. Maybe there was still a chance to get through this and make everything right. I really hoped that was the case.

I hoped it with everything in my heart. 

I talked about it with my sister, who wasn’t as hopeful but tried to sound like it anyway. I didn’t want to talk to my parents about it, so I even called Chris. She was sweet and supportive. She said she had always believed that true love could trump nature.

I knew her situation, so I bet she was selling this to me because she hoped she was right. But it felt good to hear her words all the same. I really wanted to believe them, as did she. 

Together we would fight nature and win. She’d get Patrick and I’d get Matt. I would just have to get used to Adam and his baby wandering around. Just as Patrick would have to get used to me hugging his wife every time I felt empty.

I had been feeling empty a lot recently, so in the week after what I'd decribe as 'The Tesla Incident", Chris had dropped by for hugs two times already. She didn't come in, and we didn't go anywhere, because my mum didn't trust her one bit. I did however, which made no sense at all.

We just sat in the garden, chatted a bit about nothing, and hugged. And then after about half an hour, when I had calmed down, she'd leave again. It was a bit strange, to be honest, but it really did work. Chris made me have all these unfamiliar feelings, but she was positive and encouraging all the time. It made me feel stronger. Which was exactly what I needed.

As the next week passed, I was still awkward with my own feelings, but I got a renewed sense of determination. So I decided that this weekend, I’d go to Matt and apologise for attacking Adam. Try to mend what was broken and show him that he and Adam too, could be friends instead of life partners. Show him that he could be still mine, and I his.

Chris had left her agenda open to back me up if necessary. I really appreciated that, how she would just clear her busy schedule for me. She had said it was her duty as my friend. I knew she was indebted to me forever, but I still thought it was nice of her. I think my hate for her had subsided a bit. It was replaced with hope.

So come Saturday, I was ready. I had my speech prepared and I was getting dressed in my best Matt-clothes. Which meant nothing fancy, but just the things he liked me to wear on our dates. I was just putting on my whitewash skinny jeans, when I noticed some commotion outside.

There was a white limousine in front of Matt’s house. His parents were decorating their large garden with white balloons and garlands. Glued to the scene, I saw Matt walking out of the front door with a bouquet of red roses. Lindsey was smiling next to him in a lilac dress.

No! No this wasn’t happening, not today! Not before I could…

I forgot everything else and ran downstairs. My dad was in the kitchen drinking coffee. Apparently, he hadn’t noticed what was happening across the street, since he looked at me with raised eyebrows and asked me: “David, why are you running out without a shirt on?”

“Matt!” I yelled at him. It was self-explanatory.

He took too long to get up, so I rushed outside, right in time to prevent the limo’s departure.

“Matt!” I yelled, throwing myself at the car.

The window remained shut, so I ran around and placed myself in front of the limousine, hands on the hood. No hired driver was going to release their brakes now.

“Matt!” I screamed again. But nothing happened.

I waited, standing there, holding the white limo in place. Then Matt’s parents came out and screamed at me. I didn’t care. They could scream all they want. I was fighting nature, as Chris had said. And fighting nature wasn’t something that would be easy, so I was prepared.

I wouldn’t budge as the Jenssons tried to get me away from the car. Nothing could make me move, except Matt. His father pulled me with full alpha strength, but I held on to the grill so Jack couldn’t drag me away without damaging the rented car.

Then my father came out, screaming. “Jack let go of my son! Your family has hurt him enough!”

“Fuck you Allen!” Matt’s father spit. “My son is getting married today, and I won’t let anything ruin that!”

“Ruin your son’s wedding?” My father went all out. He sounded like he could take down the planet. “Our sons were together. They LOVE each other! YOU ruined their chance on happiness with your STUPID plan that backfired in your STUPID face. My son has every right to talk to Matt right now, so LET HIM!”

I love my dad. Have I told you how much I love my dad? Well I do. Lots.

Jack let go of me as Matt stepped out of the car. He looked so incredibly sexy in his white suit. The white suit I thought up for him. The white suit I wanted HIM to wear when WE got married… It was perfect.

“Matt…” I said, getting my gaze back up to his eyes. They were glazed. He was tearing up, I could see it. His breath was high up in his chest, so I knew he was in pain. I ran to him and hugged him. 

He stood still like a statue, arms bungling limp to his sides, back stiff. I hugged him as hard as I could, reached up and whispered in his ear. “Matt, baby. I think we can fix this. I still love you, you still love me. I know you have a bond with Adam now, I know you’re having a baby. I’m not going to try to hurt him, I promise, but I still think we can make it. You and I. I think I know a way…”

No reaction came, so I loosened by grip and backed off a couple of inches, so I could look into his eyes. Matt was crying. I don’t think I have ever seen him cry like that. Silent, composed, eyes cold, but tears streaming down his face like the most beautiful waterfall on earth. I waited for him to say something, anything.

“I loved you,” he said. Past tense. 

My heart dropped and my eyes made their own waterfall. I was still holding him, but his arms wouldn’t return the favour, which made me feel like the loneliest person on the planet.

“David, I really did love you. I really thought we were meant to be together and I’m so sorry… So sorry about hurting you like I did, but it wasn’t meant to be. We were young, we thought we were fated. But now I know: I belong to Adam. And Adam belongs to me, so please… Please David. Let us be…”

He begged me. He was crying and begging me. I could only oblige and let him go. I knew him all my life, and this was the point of no return. I could tell he meant it. Every word of it. This was not his parents, nor Adam’s. He really wanted this.

He wanted Adam and not me.

I assembled every thread of sanity I still had left, kissed him on the cheek and said: “I wish you happiness.”

I meant it. I truly did. My heart was in pieces all over the lawn, but I still wanted the love of my life to be happy.

He got back into the white limousine, and I crashed onto the pavement. My father above me, patting my back. Matt’s parents slowly leaving the scene to follow Matt with their own car. And I just lay there. Face down, hurting.

My father’s comforting words and hugs did nothing. I loved him for trying, but it didn’t help. He carried me inside. My mom talked, hugged me, but I was completely cold. Nothing could pull me away from my heartbreak.

Then my mother surprised me. She said: “Baby… call Chris.”

I didn’t want Chris, I wanted Matt. But I obliged. No one hated Chris more than my mother, and if she told me to call Chris, it would be a good idea. So I did.

“Hey David!” Chris sounded optimistic and cheerful, but there was a worry in her tone I immediately picked up on.

“Hey…” I said.

“How did it go?” her tone was more sober now, as if it was expecting the worst. Which was actually quite accurate.

“He’s marrying Adam today.”

“WHAT?! Did you get a chance to speak with him? Tell him what we’ve discussed?”

“Not really. I told him I knew a way we could be together, but he didn’t want me anymore.”

“I’m coming over.” Her voice was resolute, then changed tone to the complete opposite. “Do you want me to come over?”

“Yes.” I said. “I really need a hug.”

As I hung up, I looked at my parents. They were all sympathetic, even my mum.

“She’s coming over.” I said.

My parents both nodded. Then my mum told me what to do in a way I didn’t like, but that I was going to obey anyway.

“Take your meds baby. You know I hate this. I hate her, but I understand she can probably hug you better than we can. It hurts me, you know. But now should be about you. Not about us. So go with her, but be safe. Don’t do anything stupid out of spite, okay?”

“I won’t” I promised her, thankful for the break she was giving Chris.