DECEMBER 2003
I was really looking forward to the break. I just had to get through the final exams and then I could relax for 3 weeks. But of course, life wouldn’t make that easy for me. I was starting to get sick from stress and not taking care of myself. I kept brushing it off, but it eventually caught up to me. I spent so much time studying that I pulled an all nighter the day before my first exam. I was exhausted so I went to go grab a morning coffee when the sun started coming up. I was hoping it would give me at least some energy to make it through the 3 hour exam I had soon.
I headed to the kitchen and made myself a big cup of coffee. Dad was in the kitchen sipping his own coffee and reading the news.
“You’re drinking a lot of that stuff huh?” Dad pointed out.
“It’s energy.” I sighed.
“I thought you didn’t handle that stuff too well? Your mother said it made your energy go through the roof or something?”
“Does it look like it does that?” I turned around and gave him a tired look. The bags under my eyes were so bad at this point I looked like a freaking raccoon. “It used to, but not anymore.”
“Did you sleep at all last night?” Dad looked a bit concerned.
“No, I needed to study.”
“All night?”
“Mhm. Either that or I fail.”
“You’re going to fail because of sleep deprivation at this point.”
I sighed and took a sip of my coffee. Sweet, sweet caffeine. I was about to go back to my room to get more studying in, when I started feeling really sick. At first I thought it was because of the coffee. Sometimes it did that to me. But I was wrong. I only had a couple seconds to sprint to the nearby trash can to puke right into it.
“Kevin!” Dad got up to make sure I was ok. I just kept puking. The noises woke both Mum and Daisy up. Daisy scurried out of her room to check on me, and looked very worried when she saw me puking nonstop into the trash can. Mum came out shortly after looking very cranky.
“What’s going on?” She groaned as she walked into the kitchen. She saw me puking and groaned. “You couldn’t have made it to the washroom to puke? Seriously?”
I wanted to tell her otherwise, but I was too busy expelling all my stomach acids. Mum spotted my coffee on the counter and frowned.
“Did you drink coffee?” She asked.
“He was.” Dad said. “Only got a sip in before puking though.”
“Well no wonder you’re sick, boy!” Mum scolded. “You know your body doesn’t handle caffeine well!”
“He only got a sip in, dear.” Dad said. “I doubt that’s what made him sick. He’s probably got the flu.”
“Of course he does.” Mum groaned.
It took a couple minutes to finally stop puking. I fell back against the wall and tried to calm myself down. I was freaking out. I had an exam soon that I couldn’t miss! How was I going to make it feeling like this??
“Here, let me help you to bed.” Daisy said to me. “You should rest.”
“D-Daisy! I can’t!” I cried. “I got an exam!”
“Can’t you just reschedule it?”
I shook my head. “If I don’t go, it’s an automatic fail.”
“Oh.” Daisy thought about some solutions before turning to Mum. “You got the day off, yea?”
“I’m not driving him.” Mum said.
“Emilia, there’s no way he’s gonna make it there by himself.” Dad said to Mum. “And he needs to do his exam.”
“He looks fine now.” Mum grumbled.
“Mum!! He just puked a bunch up! He’s not fine!” Daisy argued.
“Please??” I begged.
“Fine.” Mum growled. “Get ready. We’re leaving in an hour.”
I nodded. Daisy helped me to my bedroom. I was still quite shaky from puking up so much. Daisy was surprised to see all my work on my bed.
“Geez. You get up early?” She asked.
“Uh, something like that.” I mumbled as I sat down on my bed.
Daisy raised a brow. “What are you not telling me?”
“I, uh, pulled an all nighter.” I admitted. “I’ve been pulling a lot of them lately…”
“Kevin!” Daisy was a bit of a stickler when it came to keeping a good sleep schedule. She hated the idea of an all nighter. One in a week was already a lot. I was pulling at least 3-4 in a week. “No wonder you’re sick! Your body can’t protect you from the flu or a cold if you’re not sleeping enough!!”
“I know, I know…”
“Why are you pulling all nighters?? Do you really have that much work??”
I sighed. I could hear Mum walk by my room so I spoke in English just in case she could hear us. “If I don’t I’m gonna fail everything. I’m barely getting work in on time, let alone getting a good grade on it.”
“Oh. It’s that bad?”
I nodded. “If Mum saw them, my god, I’d be in for it. The only class I’m doing ok in is writing.”
“Do you think you’re gonna do ok for the exam?”
“I’ll be lucky if I can pass. I can’t concentrate at all.”
“That would be because you’re not sleeping AND drinking coffee which you shouldn’t even be drinking.”
I laughed nervously. “Fair.”
“Just do your best. Once exams are over, you can rest up and hopefully recover from this in time for next semester.”
“Hopefully.”
Mum drove me to school for my exams later that morning. I was still feeling pretty crappy, but I was trying to push through it. I got into the classroom, started the exam and did the best I could. It was a three hour exam, but it felt like a couple minutes. By the time I got out of it, I was even more exhausted. I had to take a trip to the washroom to puke again before hobbling out to the parking lot. Mum said she would pick me up, but of course she wasn’t there. I groaned as I pulled out my phone and called her.
“Hey.” I said shakily after she picked up. “You still coming to pick me up?”
“Ugh, yea, I’m going.” Mum groaned. “Gimme some time.”
“Yea. See you-” She hung up on me to end the conversation. What a shocker.
She showed up a 45 minutes later, even though it was only a 15 minute drive. She pulled up to the curb and I shakily headed to the car. I was shaky from puking earlier, and I felt like I was going to again soon.
“Thanks for picking me up.” I mumbled as I got in the car.
“Whatever.” Mum rolled her eyes. “You could’ve just walked you know.”
I looked up at her as if to say ‘do you really think I look like I want to walk right now?.’ Mum looked a bit surprised.
“Jeez Kevin.” She said. “You look like you haven’t slept properly in months.”
“Cuz I haven’t.” I mumbled.
“No? Why not?” Mum started leaving the parking lot. Of course, I started feeling really nauseous again. Not good.
“School.” I mumbled. I was focusing on trying not to be sick in the car.
“Huh. I thought they weren’t giving you that much work. Guess I was wrong!” She chuckled. “Good thing they’re keeping you busy then!”
I laughed nervously. I noticed my hand was going numb. Shoot. That was always a sign I was about to puke. It was an odd sign but it almost always meant the same thing. And with how I was feeling, I didn’t doubt I was about to hurl.
“C-can you pull over??” I asked shakily.
“Why?”
“P-puke…”
Mum immediately pulled over and just as she did I practically rolled out of the car to puke in the ditch. Thankfully only a bit came up and it was quickly over with.
“S-sorry.” I mumbled as I got back in the car.
“You better head to bed when we get home.” Mum said. “You need to sleep off this flu.”
“Can’t…” I muttered. “I gotta study… I got another exam tomorrow…”
“Rest first. Then worry about the exam. You’re not going to do well if you’re sick and exhausted.”
I sighed. We pulled back onto the road and headed home. Mum told me to go straight to bed, but I didn’t. I cracked out the stuff I needed for the next exam and studied. Or something like that. I kept dozing off for a couple minutes here and there, and I was starting to just stare at the books and lose focus. I was so out of it that I didn’t even hear Daisy come into my room when she got home from school. She had to give me a nudge so I could snap out of pointlessly staring at my books.
“You’re supposed to be resting.” Daisy stated. She didn’t sound or look too happy.
“I gotta study-”
“You’re just staring at the book! That’s not studying! You’re just exhausting yourself at this point!”
“I don’t wanna fail!” I cried. “I can’t! Mum would kill me!”
Daisy leaned over and looked me right in the eye. “You. Need. Rest.”
“But exams-”
“Daisy! There you are!” Mum walked by my room and saw Daisy. She had been looking for her and my room was the last place she expected her to be. Especially since I was supposed to be sleeping. “Kevin! You’re supposed to be sleeping! Why do you have all your textbooks out??”
“He’s been ‘studying’ instead of resting!” Daisy said angrily. “He’d rather exhaust himself than go to sleep all because he’s afraid of failing!”
“I am not!” I cried. Daisy looked ready to tell Mum about my grades and I was terrified.
“I will tell her the truth.” Daisy growled.
“You can’t!!”
“If it’s what I have to do to make you rest then I’ll do it.”
“She’ll just make me stress more!!”
“Can you speak my language?” Mum groaned. “I have no idea what you two are saying.”
“Daisy please. Don’t tell her.”
“You’ll take a break?”
“I can’t! I have to pass-”
“Kevin’s been pulling all nighters 3-4 nights a week and drinking a shit ton of coffee just so he can barely pass his classes.” Daisy ratted me out to Mum. “He thinks studying all night for tomorrow's exam is going to help his grades.”
For the first time in a while, Mum actually looked concerned about me after hearing that.
“Why are you putting yourself through so much just for a grade?” Mum questioned.
“I didn’t want to fail and then… and then you’d get upset with me.” I admitted.
Mum sighed. “Yea, I’d rather you get good grades, but jeez. Don’t kill yourself for them.”
“See?” Daisy said. “Even Mum agrees with me.”
“I just have two more exams, then I can relax-”
“No.” Mum said. She came into my room and grabbed all my textbooks and papers. She put them away and looked over at me. “You need to relax now. You’re sick, barely keeping awake, and studying isn’t going to help that.”
“But I’m gonna fail the exam!!” I cried.
“You’re going to fail it if you don’t take a break.” Mum stated. “And if you do fail it, so what? I’m sure your mark will still be good enough that you’ll pass the class.”
“Now for the last time. Sleep.” Daisy shoved me back onto the bed and forced me to lay down. She threw some blankets over me and glared at me. “And I swear to go, if I come to check on you and you’re studying, you better run.”
I sighed before nodding. Mum and Daisy left my room and started chatting outside of my room. I was starting to doze off just from laying down, but I was able to listen to a bit of their conversation.
“I suppose this is my fault, huh?” Mum sighed. “I put too much pressure on him.”
“University is tough.” Daisy said. “I imagine it was partially from the pressure of the classes.”
“I guess... I just had no idea how hard he was working. Not once did I have to tell him off for slacking.”
“He’s a hard worker. It’s about time you noticed that.”
“I suppose he is. A bit too hard I guess.”
“See?” Daisy said. “If you give him a chance, he’s actually a really great person. He’s got a lot of traits people like.”
“I’m trying to. I’m really trying to.”
After that, I fell into a deep sleep.
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