I shoved my foot in the stirrups and swung over. I was covered in blood, my arm was aching and it turned out the people who were supposed to be leading us were fighting over something. I was wishing that reality would stop teaching me lessons. I don’t particularly want to learn. I started to shiver which was not a good sign. It was a sunny evening. I really shouldn’t be shivering. We began riding, well I started riding and the rest hurried behind me. I felt really sick as in I gracefully hurled over the edge of Birch. To his credit he didn’t flinch and kept plodding along at a trot. I appeared to be leaning further and further to the left. I began sliding off the horse in a way that I wish was intentional. The last thing that I could distinctly see was the ground offering me a kiss that I could not refuse.

Fun information. Fever dreams are not fun. I thought my normal dreams were pretty haunting but as it turns out I was wrong. It was quite indescribable. It’s as if my nightmares decided to convene and torture me in a party of pain. I woke up in a bed which was nice. It also was not my cell. Equally a bonus. I however could not see where I was. I appeared to have the rag covering my eyes. It was a familiar feeling but not one I wanted to be experiencing. I tried to sit up. One arm decided not to follow the plan and I slumped down. Someone came near me beside the bed. A female voice whispered in my ear.

“ You were unconscious. How are you feeling?”

She seemed genuinely concerned.

I genuinely wanted water.

“Water please” I rasped. She didn’t appear to hear me. She heard me when I shredded my throat to shout pitifully for water. It was hard to be intimidating when you are unable to move. She understood that time and I could hear her hurry off. I tried to slip the rag off my face. It was suffocating me. A hand stopped me. It was wrinkling and stiff and full of bones. Maybe a skeleton had my hand. A frailer voice than mine brushed against my ears.

“Tis the Saint Envy here to deliver you from harm.”

I responded with as much sarcasm my dry throat would allow.

“Seems like you are a little late to deliver me from harm considering the state I’m in. Would you mind telling me whose bed i’m in?”

A breath touched my ear as Envy whispered rapidly the details of our predicament.

“We caught you after your horse dragged you a bit. We lashed you across your horse and we tried to ride quickly. You were burning up and murmuring about nonsense. We didn’t really have much choice but to try and get you somewhere safe. Luckily it turns out the Holy Sepulchre of Moon’s Edge was along the road. Extraordinarily you happen to know a holy maiden of the Order of Cleansing Light. So we were allowed inside even though you happen to not be a woman. We managed to play Lust off as a teenage mother with Wrath as her kid. Pride is with the horses in the forests. We all thought that if they saw his wings they might recognize him. I also told them you were blind so don’t take off the blindfold. You should refer to me as Her Reverence when around other people. You supposedly are my converts. Try at least to act reformed and devout.”

I didn’t have the voice to tell the crone to go to hell but I’m sure Envy understood my feelings on the matter.

“It's only until you get better.”

Great. It looks like the outside world is basically like the cell. Nothing but pain and boredom. Hunger too. And it appears that whoever I sent for water meant to torture me for my sins. A desert formed in my throat. Envy stood up and walked off somewhere, hopefully for water. I would have liked to complain but finally the Nun returned. I felt a piece of pottery touch my bottom lip and opened wide to have some rain on the cursed dryness of my tongue. Instead I choked on the bitterness of whatever liquid met my mouth. The Nun tutted and forced me to continue swallowing that toxic poison. Medicine my ass. According to the Nun I was drinking tree sap. If she told me it was her piss I would have believed her. The nastiness remained much longer than the refreshing relief it brought to my parched mouth. She also put a wet cloth on my forehead which felt nice. The Nun was alright I guess. She had started praying next to me which I immediately tuned out. It did however smash me with a hammer of memories. My mom was a believer in the Moonlight sect of the Church of Light. I remember the prayer of protection that she taught me.

Oh lord of light hold your sway over the moon tonight and aid the weary and the worn. Brighten the trails and shine on roads. Guide homeless to hearth and hand to food.May you watch over the sleep of all the faithful.

It seems naive now to think that God ever listened to anyone that prayed. The priests seemed to think the same. The holy priest of the holdfast believed that I was evil trapped contained and to purge us would be to release that sin upon mankind. The jokes on him considering I haven’t killed everyone yet. I was starting to think it would be a good start. At least if those green robes would die I could at least relax a little. Instead I couldn’t move or see and was defended by nuns. At least there is a convenient graveyard for my corpse. I assume. I wouldn’t know because I was blindfolded.

The nun finished through her 20 minutes of praying and left the room. Silence was not good for me. Nor was darkness. Together they caused a nasty amount of memories to flood through my mind. Today’s speciality was memories of Teacher’s training. A lot of my memories were of Teacher's training. It used to be constant. I’d wake up and he would teach. Protection against arrows, knives, swords, axes. Almost anything he could throw at me. I still have scars from the whips and blades. In the beginning he used to force me to kill other prisoners. To show what tactics a desperate man would use to avoid death. He was a sorcerer. He made sure I knew it. Sorcerers had many specialties. He taught them all to me. I killed golems, dodged rune traps and fireballs. The problem was he refused to tell me how it was done. He tried to teach me the runes for mending and sleep. I didn’t understand it, it was all just lines and “willing” things into happening. Eventually I had gotten good enough at protecting myself that I just didn’t get hit anymore. I could dodge most things or block it with a shield. So the training stopped. That was almost worse. Before at least I got to move and go outside with the rag off. Once the training had stopped I had nothing to do. Just sit and contemplate dying. I had some books but even those were filtered of useful knowledge. I was meant to be the sheathed blade, only taken out when in use.

I tried to think of a less grimm topic for my mind to think about. It decided instead to focus on how suffocating being unable to see was. Great. Now it was unbearable. I decided to do a checklist that Teacher had taught me after combat. I currently had one arm that was probably disease and fever caused by that. I was feeling weak. The current enemy forces were two green robed sorcerers of unknown strength. The knights would have a hard time keeping up with us without saddles for their horses. They would be hard to replace. Twenty knights was a substantial investment. Some historical texts that I was allowed to read creddited 15 knights as the difference between winning and losing. These texts were also written by rich people so it had a fifty-fifty chance of being right. Who would gain most by having the sins on their side. I mean we all have skills that are useful but not to the point of winning a war, right? If it was the Prince or the King then maybe it was a manpower issue. If they didn’t have enough manpower then how could they send twenty knights after us? Such questions could be answered if I wasn’t bedridden in some church. Maybe the church had sent their knights and sorcerers after us. We quite literally were sins and described as such. I mean I alone have enough murder to become a flock of crows. Wrath, Envy, and Lust also probably have led to a lot of death. Looks like Pride is the odd one out.

I decided that it was better to doze again then to get stuck thinking about every problem we faced.

I awoke to the lovely sounds of hymns being sung. Ancient voices echoed through the halls into whatever room I was in. I felt better and my arm was throbbing less. I tried to sit up. I felt a hand on my forehead. I could feel a strange pulling to touch the hand. Ah it was Lust. That would explain the silence. I managed to sit up and even my throat felt better.

“Water please.”

Lust reached over and pressed something to my mouth. It was the same nasty liquid from before. He must have foreseen my urge to spit it out and pinched my nose. Down it went like slug milk. I had never eaten a slug but that definitely is what I thought it would taste like. I had quite enough of the sick lifestyle. I swung one leg over the edge to the bed. Turns out sleeping for a day does not help one's coordination. I stumbled and Lust caught me. Full body contact sent desire rushing through my veins. I had to clench my hands to stop myself from wrapping him in an embrace. I pulled away as quickly as I could. I ended upright against a wall. I followed the wall in an attempt to go somewhere. I didn’t really care where as long as it wasn’t in the bed of introspection. Lust grabbed my hand and was attempting to pull me somewhere. My brain was telling me to follow him to the ends of the earth. Logical me was trying frantically to ignore that urge. It was a duel to the death. The battle was abruptly ended by my walking into a metal object. I couldn’t tell what it was but I had a fun new headache to try out. The pain managed to wake me up a little. I think Lust moved me to the middle of a hallway maybe? I began counting paces. Fourteen to somewhere with a door with creaky hinges and another fifteen to a bench. It was hard and stiff. You could feel the grooves worn into it. A voice boomed out startling me.

“Sister’s and esteemed guests, we have the honor of hearing her reverence Sister Farnese of the order of holy light give her sermon. Sister if you may?”

Envy’s voice came out as an oracle’s, filled with ancient surety of what was and what is to come. Her voice without being loud, held power that rippled across the blackness I saw and held my mind captive.

“Sister’s, today I speak of calamity, of the light fading from our noble realm. The royal family ordained by his lordship have cleft in two the kingdom that the lord of light provides. As it is said in Et Priuatam Luminis, we are the stewards of the light, the torches of his will. His will is all that the light shines upon, the king and his kingdom. So too is his, those that lie in shadow, for the shadows is casted by his light.

That brought murmurs from unseen people around me. Unabated, Envy preached.

“Those who stray from the light must be returned to it. The king and the prince are falling into shadow. I came upon a village burned to ash by a marauding army. Children naught but ash and blood laid bare to the bright lord. It is our lord's will to shepherd those into the light who have strayed. The king must be returned to the light. The prince must be returned to the light. I have set out to do so. Holy brethren must return to arms as in the Anno Flammae. Sword and shield must once again reflect holy light into the heart of man.”

Silence held for a few minutes before a voice came from the back.

“The Luna Ferro must be reformed and the Lux Custos. We will return this kingdom to the lord's light.”

This was not a nun. It was the voice of gravel, of iron dread. It was distinctly recognizable by the hush in the air. It was a Potens Solens. You could always tell by their voice. It was flat and unchanging like a rock face. My mother always warned me to say my prayers or one would judge my sin. They were the missionaries that spread the light across the world. They stood like mountains having been trained since birth to teach the faith by any means. Those who stood against them …

“It is time the order of holy light performs its true duty once again.”

It looked like we weren’t the only guests.

Envy recovered bravely.

“Your reverence I am not worthy of your presence. Had I known I would have yielded the sermon to you instead.”

“You spoke truth, sister and that is worthy in the eyes of the lord. You spoke words that many would fear to utter. You will come with me to the Citadel of Stella Umbrae in the capital. We will convene the rest of the order.”

A finality rested with those words. A concerning development.

Envy seemed to realize this. A Solens said jump and you would pray you were high enough.

“I must prepare my things and my companions.”

“Very well sister. We shall leave tomorrow.”

A mass movement happened as the nuns dispersed. I was tugged along by someone into a room that was adjoining i'm assuming the chapel. I finally had the blindfold removed. It seemed like it was Wrath that was responsible for getting me out of that horrible rag. Lust was there. The room was eerily similar to my cell. Envy rushed through the door.

"Shit, shit ..."

The legendary double shit. This must be worse than I thought. A flurry of hand signals went between Lust and Wrath. Wrath spoke.

"Lust says that we are .... I think that sign means k?"

I was lost. What was going on? What sign? Wrath thought for a second.

"Oh fucked. That makes more sense."

Envy saw my bewilderment.

"They were taught how to spell words using signs by one of the sisters that took a vow of silence."

That made marginally more sense. Still I must say I seemed to get the worse deal out of all of them.

"Congrats Envy you have a cult."

Envy looked panicked and her wrinkled features began to slouch.

"Shut up Death. I just wanted to make them hostile to the green robes that are following us. We've got to escape tonight. Farnese is a real holy maiden. They will realize there are two of us. It'll end badly."

Suddenly the door swung open and a nun poked her head in, uttered something and fell to the floor dead. I should not have looked at the door. I shrugged and sighed. Luck you cruel mistress.