As Mark tried to push his way through the crowd so he could get off the subway, in his mind, he cursed himself for his foolish decision of not using his car or even taking a taxi. He thought that by using the subway he would get there faster and be punctual, but at that moment he was far from punctual.
But he no longer made sense to complain. Although he wasn't showing up that late, Mark had always hated being late. As he climbed the subway stairs to go out onto the street, he thought that at least he must have accepted Eric's idea of going for coffee at a less busy time.
But no, Mark thought it would be a better idea to invite him to lunch, in the middle of Manhattan during rush hour.
What a fool I was, he thought.
But it would be worth it. Eric was more excited about the lunch invitation than a coffee outing, so he assumed Eric wanted something closer to a date.
Mark's conscience was torturing him, he knew he was playing with fire. It was obvious that Eric was a little excited about him, only a blind man wouldn't notice. He knew Eric was starting to like him, and an invitation to lunch would probably give him hope.
But it’s not that he wanted to delude him and play with his feelings… Eric was a good boy, a cute and shy omega and above all he awoke his instinct to protect.
He had a different personality than Chris… and that was what he needed. He didn't want a replacement for Chris, he wanted to forget him by meeting someone different, to help him get him out of his mind.
He knew it was a very silly excuse, that after all he would be using him... But unlike what another person could understand by “using someone”, Mark wanted to get Chris out of his mind, out of his heart and for Eric to take that place. He didn't want to play with him, he wanted to love him too.
Mark was hoping that he could feel the same feelings that Eric could feel.
Upon arriving at the restaurant, he saw Eric at the entrance. He felt anxious at the thought that he was probably already leaving. Was he being too late? He looked at his watch, thirty minutes had passed since the time they agreed to meet.
But when their gazes met, Eric grinned and approached him almost hurriedly.
“Mark!”
“Eric, did you wait long? I'm really sorry, I thought I would arrive sooner using the subway, but it was worse.”
Eric shook his head, looking down, feeling a bit embarrassed.
“Actually, I got here recently, I was late too. When I arrived and didn't see you, I thought you were gone… But even so I stayed to wait for you, I'm glad I stayed.”
“I'm sorry for making you wait, I think a coffee in the morning would have been better... There are fewer people.”
Mark looked toward the restaurant and Eric did the same. There were only a couple of tables available.
Eric shook his head again and sheepishly said, “it’s okay, I didn't wait long. Also, I like the idea of eating with you more than just having a coffee…”
“I'm glad it's so, shall we go in?”
Eric nodded and they both entered. Mark felt regret again when he noticed Eric a little nervous. He thought it was because of their encounter, but soon realized it was because of the number of people in the restaurant.
“Do you like this place? We can go to another restaurant if you want, there are several around here.”
“They are probably full…”
“Right, sorry.”
Eric laughed.
“I like it here. It is full of people, but it is a nice restaurant. Do you come here often?”
“To be honest, I've never been here,” Mark said as a waiter led them to their table. “But I had heard good comments about this restaurant and was looking forward to coming.”
“So this is your first time here?” Mark nodded at his question, Eric smiled and they both sat down. “Well, it's my first time too.”
“I just hope the comments haven't lied to me and the food is good.”
They both laughed and the waiter brought them the menu. Mark was somewhat embarrassed when he asked for a Tomahawk cut while Eric asked for something lighter with little meat and much more vegetable.
“I don't know if I eat too much or you eat too little,” Mark joked.
“It's natural for alphas to eat too much, isn't it? They have a very fast metabolism. If I wanted to eat what you asked for, it would probably take me days to drop those calories.”
“Are you worried about your weight? In my opinion you look good, I even think you need more proteins.”
“Do you seriously believe it? About that I look good…”
“Of course I do! You don’t believe it?”
“Of course I believe you.”
“I wasn't referring to me, but to you. Do you look good to yourself?”
Eric hesitated for a moment and it was Mark who spoke again.
“You should, because there's nothing wrong with you.”
Eric's face flushed slightly.
They were silent when the waiter arrived with their meals. Eric was surprised by the sheer size of Mark's steak and most of all he was impressed by how appetizing it looked. Eric had ordered a small Sirloin cut with veggies, but it didn't compare to the juicy appearance of Mark's prime rib steak. However, he knew that he could never finish such an amount of meat, so he was satisfied with his food.
He suddenly saw a second fork approaching on his plate carrying with it a piece of meat from Mark's plate. When he looked up, he saw him grin widely as he placed the piece of meat on his plate.
“At least give it a try. I have meat to spare.”
Eric was embarrassed. Did Mark realize that he was viewing his food as if he were some kind of stray dog admiring a butcher shop counter? Still, he tasted the piece of meat that Mark offered him.
“How is it?” Mark asked enthusiastically.
“It's… delicious,” Eric murmured as he savored the smooth consistency of the meat. “Thank you, you are very attentive. Your wife is a lucky woman to have you as a husband.”
Eric immediately regretted mentioning his wife, thinking that he would only make him uncomfortable, but he wanted to remind himself that Mark was married and that he shouldn’t be delusional. Mark stared at him a bit confused and started laughing.
“Wife?”
“Are you one of those men who hide that they are married?” Eric teased.
Mark showed him his hands.
“There is no ring.”
“You could just take it off,” he teased again.
They both looked into each other's eyes and Mark laughed again.
“I got divorced… it's already almost half a year of that.”
Eric was surprised to hear it. So Mark is… single? He couldn't help but get excited, Mark was not a forbidden man and he thought maybe he would have a chance with him…
But could he really have a chance? Could a recessive omega like him be with a dominant alpha like Mark?
“Oh… I didn't know that, sorry about your divorce.”
“Don't worry, it was an arranged marriage so it was never going to work out. But tell me, are you one of those who take off their rings?”
Eric didn't quite understand his question, until he realized Mark was looking at his left ring finger. Eric immediately covered that hand with the other.
He had worn the engagement ring Chris gave him for so long that when he took it off, a lighter colored stripe of his skin remained on that finger.
“It's not what you think!” he justified nervously. “Actually I… was engaged not long ago to another omega.”
“Seriously?”
“Yes! But… he cheated on me at his bachelor party with an alpha… and the wedding was canceled.”
Mark didn't speak right away, and Eric felt anxious. What if Mark doesn't believe him? What if his only chance went down the drain?
But suddenly Mark made a worried expression.
“Oh, that must have been awful, I'm so sorry. Cheat on you with an alpha? What a coward... Although honestly, I am more surprised that your ex-partner was another omega, I mean, there is nothing wrong, but it is surprising.”
“We were actually together since before I expressed myself as an omega. We were an omega and beta couple.”
“So when he found out you were omega he ended up cheating on you with an alpha, right?”
“...Yes,” Eric lied, unable to dare to say that he never told Chris that he was an omega.
“That's terrible.”
“I know, but I'm fine… I decided to go on with my life and forget about it.”
“You'll do fine.”
Eric felt more reassured by feeling Mark's warm support. But he had a slight weight on his conscience for lying to him about not telling Chris that he was an omega.
Still, they continued to eat calmly, shifting the conversation to more trivial topics.
After leaving the restaurant, Mark and Eric continued talking as they walked down the sidewalk. The number of people had decreased and the walk became more enjoyable.
“I really wish to keep talking to you, but I have to go now.”
“Oh, I see,” Eric said, a little disappointed. “Don’t worry about me. You've done enough with paying for the food when I should have been the one to pay for it since I called you.”
Mark shook his head.
“I suggested the restaurant. Besides, I wanted to invite you to lunch. But I gave you my phone number but I never asked for yours, what a fool I am.”
“Then I'm glad I called you,” Eric said as he smiled. “Thank you for today…”
“There is nothing to be thankful for, thank you for your company.”
Mark smiled back at Eric and started to leave. Eric watched him walk away, until he began to decrease that distance again, going after him.
“Mark!”
“Something happens?” Mark asked, stopping, looking at Eric expectantly.
Eric took the sleeve of Mark's jacket, ashamed of himself.
“I…” he started to say, looking down, unable to dare to make eye contact with Mark. “I was wondering if we could meet again… We could go for a coffee, or just go for a walk…”
“…Like a date?”
“It doesn't have to be a date if you don't want to!” Eric said, alarmed. “I don't want to overwhelm you, it may just be a friend's outing, something casual.”
Mark smiled and reached for Eric's hand that was holding his jacket.
“I'll be busy these days, I have a few more interviews.”
“Oh I understand.”
Mark smiled at Eric's poor attempt to hide his disappointment.
“But when I have free time, would you like to go out on a date with me?”
Eric didn't expect Mark to actually ask him out on a date, so it was very difficult to hide his emotion from him.
“Of course! I'll wait for you until you have free time!”
“Well then.” Mark took Eric's hand and lightly stroked his knuckles. “I will call you.”
Mark started walking and slowly released Eric's hand as he walked. This time Eric didn't go after him. He watched him walk away until he was lost among the people.
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