Chapter 18 

That’s a bit harsh, I’ll admit. I’m sure my parents love me to some degree and I’m fairly certain my dad cares about me. My mother, well. I’m a little less certain about her feelings towards me but that’s fine, I’m not her biggest fan either. 

My parents also aren’t super crazy for each other - they didn’t marry for love, and that’s fine. A lot of couples don’t marry for love but instead for other resources, and that is a perfectly valid reason, except that my parents are a terrible match.

Or no, they might actually be a great match. Both my father and mother’s parents are rich and snobby, with my father inheriting the family company and becoming a CEO of some boring estate agency firm or something, I’ll be honest he never talks about his work and the one time I asked him he gave me a super vague answer so I don’t even really know what he does. The point it, he’s rich and so is his family.

Inherited money and all that.

Well, the same is true of my mother. Her whole family is big into investing their fortune and they are big investors of my father’s company. Their two families were semi close and so when Dahlia could no longer play the piano and have her own career, she needed someone to take care of her when her parents no longer wanted to financially support her.

She and my father married because it benefitted them both: my dad would keep receiving investments whilst my mother could do nothing all day. 

And then they had me.

And they both had no idea how to raise a child so I spent most of my time with my grandparents. I’m lucky. I have a good family, I’m able to study what I want in a good university and my parents will support me financially until I am able to take care of myself.

I’m lucky, and I’m grateful to have all these things. So does that mean I’m greedy to wish that my parents showed me the love and affection I never got growing up? I must be greedy. So there’s no way I can talk to anyone else about these feelings.

I mean, how could I tell my closest friend, Miri, about my petty woes when her family has struggled for years to be able to pay for her university tuition? How could I tell Beck about my tiny issues when he literally has a disability? 

And I know that my life isn’t perfect: I mean my mother is a tiny bit verbally abusive I’ll admit, but that doesn’t mean my struggles are anything like other people’s; it just means I should grow a thicker skin against what she says, right? Right?

Rebecca🌸: I think you’d like my sisters, they remind me a lot of you actually

I blink a few times before sighing and rubbing my eyes. I need to get out of my own damn head for a moment.

Griffin🦅: oh yeah? What in particular?

Rebecca🌸: They’re both very spunky

I stare at my phone before letting out a little laugh. “Spunky, huh?” 

Griffin🦅: wow ok I’ll take that, makes me sound energetic rather than the lazy arse I actually am

Rebecca🌸: Pfft you’re not a lazy arse, Griffin. 

Griffin🦅: and how would you know that?? I’m legit lying in bed right now

Rebecca🌸: Bad example, I’m also lying in bed because it’s late

Griffin🦅: yeah ok I’ll let you have that one

Rebecca🌸: But really though, you always work hard on the game and it sounds like you put in the effort on your assignments too

Griffin🦅: ok yeah that’s kind of true I do try hard at my uni work 

Rebecca🌸: See you’re hardly a lazy arse :)

Smiling at my phone, I send Beck a couple more texts as I quickly rustle up some food and eventually eat it. We end up messaging into the night until I get a fun text from Miri. She often texts me at 2am anyway so it’s not that surprising and I plan to ignore it at first, until I read the little preview of the notification.

Miri😈: I got bad news babe

Quickly clicking on to the message, I feel my breath catch for a moment.

Miri😈: there’s a rumour going around about u

Miri😈: i’m 99% sure rodger started it to get back at u

Sighing, I message her back.

Griffin🦅: what’s the rumour about??

Miri😈: u going around sleeping with a bunch of guys

Miri😈: fairly standard slander but still hurtful

I just sigh again. I mean really? Was this the best Rodger could come up with? Seriously, he needs to just grow up. 

Griffin🦅: god he’s so stupid 

Griffin🦅: like yeah that kind of stuff isn’t the nicest to hear but it’s not like I actually care

Miri😈: didn’t think u would

Miri😈: which is good don’t get me wrong

Miri😈: it’s just

Miri😈: the rumour is also that you cheated on ur bf by trying to convince rodger, a supposedly straight guy, to have sex with u

What the fuck. That’s a really serious allegation. I mean the whole cheating thing aside, I just got accused of sexual harassment, possibly even assault depending on who started these rumours and how far they’ll take them.

Griffin🦅: it has to be rodger who started this

Griffin🦅: no way would anyone else do this

Griffin🦅: what the actual fuck is wrong with him

Griffin🦅: I mean I’m seriously this close from going to the police about how he’s harassing me but it’s not like they’ll do anything

Miri😈: I’m so sorry about this babe

Miri😈: I should’ve never introduced u guys, I can’t believe I didn’t see how awful he is

Griffin🦅: it’s not your fault don’t sweat it babes

Griffin🦅: still I don’t know if I’m supposed to let this blow over or confront rodger

Miri😈: absolutely do not confront him

Miri😈: u don’t know what other bullshit he’ll say

Griffin🦅: yeah but what if he sees I’m ignoring the rumours and makes them worse??

Griffin🦅: like wtf if he starts telling ppl I attacked him or smth

Griffin🦅: I just don’t know what to do

Griffin🦅: and I’m supposed to be seeing my fucking parents this weekend

Griffin🦅: if my mother knew there were these kinds of rumours about me she’d be so fucking pissed

Miri😈: hey yo she’s ur mum it’s not like she won’t listen to ur side of things anyway

Miri😈: that’s if she even hears about it

Miri😈: which I doubt she will

I forgot that I never told Miri about what my mother is like, she knows that I just don’t get on with her super well.

I really don’t know what to do. I mean, how the fuck am I supposed to sort out this shit?