“Eww! Don’t fucking touch her. You’ll get freak germs.”
“Somebody has to put the weirdo queer in her place.”
“Go Jacob! Break her nose,” Melanie squealed.
“Shut up slut,” Brian hissed back at her before turning back to me. Even with my vision stained red by pressure and blood, I could still see the murderous glint in those eyes as he took his place beside Jacob. I could never forget it.
“Fine. You asked for it.”
I was barely standing as it was. But the blow that came next nearly knocked me out as I was launched off my feet. Fight back, you son of a bitch, I told myself as I crawled to my knees, pretending I didn’t feel the pain even though it hurt to breathe. Of course I didn’t, though. I couldn’t fight back. I couldn’t do anything. Telling them to fuck off just got them more aggrivated. My father never taught me how to fight. Only how to take punches.
“Again! Again!” And take them I did.
I spat blood at Brian’s feet, imagining centipedes crawling out of his eyes. I hope you rot in hell, bitch.
I was shoved back on the ground with a swift kick to the ribs. I felt something crack. I couldn’t breathe.
With weak arms I tried to protect my face from the entourage of kicks from both Jacob and Brian. A whole crowd was gathering in the parking lot. Even staff and teachers stood idly by. Of course they didn’t do shit. They never did. How stupid of me to expect anything different.
Holy shit, I thought between the pain as I struggled to breathe. Am I going to die like this? In the high school parking lot? It was my last thought as I watched Brian smile with the look of a man ready to kill.
And then he went down to the concrete with the force of a boulder, arm immediately shattered on impact as my knight in shining armor absolutely pummeled him to the ground.
“Fuck you, Brian!” he screamed as he socked him in the jaw until he went limp. “I hope you choke on your own damn blood!”
It was only when Toby launched onto Jacob that the staff jumped in to pry them apart. No one gave a shit when it was me being beaten to all hell. No one ever did…
…except Tobias.
“What the hell are you doing tracking up so much blood in my goddamn house?” That Man slurred, stumbling off the lounge chair he spent almost all his time in.
“Sorry sir,” I mumbled, limping to the stairs. I almost made it too, but the grip of his fist, even intoxicated, is not something to take lightly. He clenched my wrist so tight I thought it would snap in half. I didn’t let the pain show, knowing it would just make him angrier.
“Why the fuck do you keep picking fights? No daughter of mine behaves that badly in front of other people.”
“Not your daughter,” I mumbled beneath my breath. Bad move.
“What did you just say?”
“Sorry s-” I didn’t even have time to blink before I was knocked back onto the steps by a slap hard enough to break a neck. The whole room spun too fast for me to catch it. I saw lights and fuzz floating around my vision. The man, losing interest, left me to bleed on the steps as he took his place back on the lounge. And then the anxiety wore off. And everything hurt like I was just run over by a truck.
And I started screaming.
I screamed over and over, out of pain and frustration and a hurt that ran deeper than just my broken rib and bruised body. And my father didn’t move an inch. He just reached for his beer and turned on the news. I screamed so loud and so long that the neighbors ended up calling the cops. I must have blacked out because I woke up in the ER. Wasn’t the first time.
It was after that incident that I ended up living with Ria full-time until high school ended. I packed up all my shit without a word, just a suitcase and backpack full of things, and left. The last I saw my father he was sitting on that stupid lounge chair, watching the news, not giving a single fuck about anything on this godforsaken planet.
The last thing I want in this life is to be like him. Still, it seems like I’m becoming more and like him every day. How do I stop it? How do I change? I don’t know what to do.
***
Is that bacon? My mouth was watering before I was even fully awake. Woah I’m hungry.
So, good news is I’m not hungover. Bad news is I’m not hungover. But, like I said before, a problem for another day. Speaking of which, I drank all the rest of my beer last night. I need to go buy some more.
I avoided the mirror as much as I could. Unfortunately, I couldn’t avoid it forever. And, good lord, that was a look. With enough brushing of my teeth and hair to make my mouth no longer taste like iron and acid and my hair no longer look like a bird nest, I changed into another pair of black skinny jeans and a thrifted gray sweatshirt that hung loosely over my ass.
Laurie was frying bacon at the counter. I immediately offered to help.
“Oh so you’re a respectful young man too? Toby should have introduced you to me sooner!” she smiled. I pretended like the mention of his name didn’t stab a knife through my heart and smiled back.
“No, sweetie. I’m all set here,” she responded with a pat on my shoulder. “Now eat up. You need to be healthy and strong to help me out at the brewery.”
“Alright. Thank you for breakfast, Laurie.”
“I told you before, stop thanking me already. I’m happy to do it.”
Eating warm, greasy food was just what I needed. I couldn’t help but close my eyes and savour the taste and feeling.
"That good? You’ll just boost my ego with those faces.”
“So good. Or maybe it’s just because I haven’t really eaten much lately.”
“I can tell. You’re thin as a stick.”
“I’m not that skinny.”
“Christopher, you’re as stubborn and delusional as my cousin told me.”
“I- did he really talk about me?” I shoved a forkful of egg into my mouth nervously.
“Only good things… well, mostly good things.” Laurie laughed at the scowl growing on my face.
“The locals are going to love you.”
“Is that sarcasm?” I asked defensively.
“For once, no. I actually think they will.”
“Oh.” I took another bite and washed it down with a glass of water. Wonder what working at a brewery is like. Guess I’ll find out soon enough.
“So what’s next on the agenda? Where in the world are you traveling after West Virginia?”
“Apparently Pennsylvania. Don’t know why yet.”
“Good ol’ North. Lemme tell you, it’s a lot better of an environment than Ohio.”
“Uhm thanks.”
“Is that bacon?” A groggy Quinn asked as he descended the steps. He was practically drowning in his oversized sweatshirt and shorts. I snorted.
“Hello Laurie. How’d you sleep?”
“Even the coworker is polite! You don’t find so many polite people in towns like these. I’m doing alright, Quinn. Thank you for asking.”
“Sure,” the man chuckled. He flashed a quick wave at me which I promptly ignored. I know I’m an asshole but what am I supposed to do? Wave back and act all chummy like we’re best friends or something? We’re not friends. He’s just a petty thief who could get caught any second now and I’m the pathetic boyfriend of a dead man and a time will come when we never see each other again. I’m never getting my heart broken ever again, not even from acquaintances.
“So what are we going to be working on around here, Laurie?”
“I’m so glad you asked, Quinn.” A devilish smile curled onto the woman’s lips. I won’t lie. I felt afraid for what came next.
***
Of fucking course I’m scrubbing the damn barn. Why is this place so dusty? There’s mud on the ceiling. Why is there mud on the ceiling? And why does Quinn look so fucking happy lifting and restocking the barrels of ale? He should be as miserable as I am right now. Look at these noodle arms. They weren’t made for heavy duty work.
“What are you grumbling on about?” Quinn asked with a lighthearted laugh.
“Mind your damn business,” I growled back, earning yet another laugh from the thief. “What are you so happy about anyways?”
“That kind woman gave us a place to stay for awhile. This is the least I can do to repay her.”
“That’s easy for you to say. You have actual muscles. How the hell do you get abs anyway working at a sandwich shop?”
“You know, you complain an awful lot,” he chuckled.
“And I thought criminals were supposed to be all stoic and aggressive but you’re a fucking saint!” I grumbled, ignoring him.
“Does commiting one crime make you a criminal?”
“Uh yeah, that’s like the whole fucking point.” I rolled my eyes.
“Oh come on, Christopher. You can’t tell me you haven’t done anything illegal in your life.”
“I haven’t purloined an oddly expensive and famous heirloom from centuries ago, thank you very much.”
“Oh so the toddler has the knowledge of vernacular above the second grade.”
“Do me a favor and go fuck yourself.”
“If you actually scrub the floor faster than a sloth, maybe you can even watch.”
I launched the scrubbing brush in my hands at his head, which he easily dodged even while holding a full crate of beer. I cursed him out beneath my breath as he laughed and walked out.
What a conceited dipshit. Acting all nice and whatever like he’s better than me. God, happy people piss me off. I bet he wouldn’t be so sunshiny if his boyfriend just killed himself. Not that he seems gay or anything. So I guess girlfriend. Dammit straight people piss me off too. Imagine being able to have a normal relationship. And to have a normal relationship with family and friends too? It’s all I ever wanted. Fuck. Whatever.
I pushed myself up off the floor and picked up the brush I had launched, dipping it back into the soapy water of the rusty bucket and went back to scrubbing. He does have a point though. Laurie is giving us a place to stay. This is the least I can do. Might as well try to do it right.
Does Laurie normally do all this work by herself? The thought suddenly struck me as I climbed up the rickety ladder to reach the muddy ceiling. Does she manage this place by herself? She has to have coworkers, right? Or at least someone to help out. So where are they? Isn’t this place supposed to open in like an hour or two? It’s an actual pigsty.
With that preposition, I felt immediately guilty for my complaining. So I cleaned until my fingers blistered and my knuckles bled and the whole place practically shined. I even managed to fix the broken hinge on the barn door. I sat down on an empty barrel beside Quinn, both of us breathless from the manual labor. He wiped at the beads of sweat on his forehead.
“You should treat those,” he said, motioning to my fingers. I shrugged, unbothered. It’s nothing.
“Not a big deal.”
“Don’t be an idiot. Stay there. I’ll be right back.” I shrugged again as Quinn pulled himself up and disappeared yet again.
I feel tired enough to actually sleep for once. It’s both a terrible and nice feeling. All I want to do is shower and curl back up in bed. Later. I’ll do that later.
“I told you it’s fine,” I protested as Quinn sat back down next to me with a first aid kit.
“And I told you not to be an idiot.”
“Didn’t I say before? It’s part of my charm.”
“Give me your hands.”
The alcohol didn’t even sting. But the look in his eyes did. Not that it should matter. But… has anyone in my life looked at me that gently? He’s treating me like some kicked puppy. And, while I hate pity, I have to say being treated benevolently like this isn’t so bad. I’m just not used to it. Even Toby used to treat me like I was the strong one, the one who could handle anything. I just went along and pretended it was true.
“You don’t have to pity me. I just have weak skin from like not doing shit,” I told the man in front of me.
“I’m not pitying you.”
“Then what’s that look?”
“It’s… nothing. Nevermind.”
“Whatever,” I shrugged for a third time. Doesn’t matter, right? I’m too tired to argue.
It was silent as Quinn dressed my small wounds. Some birds were chirping and dogs were barking and the wind was blowing through the open barn doors. But there were no more words. Fine by me, to be honest. It’s kind of peaceful. Maybe it’s the first tranquil moment of my life without Toby in it. Let’s not dwell on that too long.
I studied Quinn’s face, his green eyes and deep, tan skin. His curls and the slight crookedness of his bottom teeth. If someone as innocent-looking as him can perform such a daunting task like stealing with success, I wonder what other secrets he’s hiding. What else is the mysterious Quinn, the necklace thief, capable of? He doesn’t seem like a bad person. I just hope I’m right in my intuition.
“Oh my god!” Laurie yelped in surprise at the outcome of our cleaning.
“It hasn’t been this clean in fifteen years!”
“Did we do an ok job?” Quinn asked her with a charming smile.
“Incredible! Just wait until Narci and Jeremiah see this! With you two here, this place will be the cleanest it’s ever been.”
“Christopher did most of the work. I just did the heavy lifting,” Quinn assured, giving me a side-eyed smirk. I frowned at him, knowing that wasn’t true.
“I-”
“Chris! You’re a lifesaver! Thank you,” Laurie beamed. I winced at her words, though she seemed to talk it as a smile, as she happily walked away. I’m not a lifesaver. I’m anything but.
“Why did you say that?” I asked Quinn. I couldn’t get the anger out of my voice. It wasn’t directed toward him, but it sure sounded that way.
“It’s the truth. You complain a lot but you get shit done.”
“I didn’t- I’m not… never mind.”
“I think you act all tough to hide the fact that you actually have a heart.”
“The fuck do you know?” I mumbled angrily as I got up.
“I didn’t mean that as an insult.”
“I told you already, Quinn. Stay the fuck out of my business.”
“Fine. But keep acting like that and you’re going to be miserable for the rest of your life.”
That’s the whole point, pomeranian. It’s not like I have much life left to live anyways. I stuffed my hands in my pockets and walked out of the barn. I'm not living some fairytale. This is real life. And real life is shit.
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