The AUTHOR has something to say:- Hello my dearies, I will be updating every sunday. 3 to 4 chapter bulk upload.

Say you love me? ಠ◡ಠ |I might just upload extra|

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Zylith.

DEAR LIFE, 

When I said "Can my day get any worse" it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.

Who would've guessed my life would be toppled upside down in just a single day. And to think that I would end up as a bride to a stinky old pedophile, life couldn't suck anymore.

"May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of that jerk mummy king and may his arms be too short to scratch them off." I screamed at the top of my voice. I couldn't suppress my anger and frustration any longer. After I was so very nicely gift-wrapped and delivered to the ugly mummy king, that jerk just tossed me off to this stinky old chancellor like a present he wasn't fond off. I wasn't even considered a person, rather an object. And now that I ended up in that pedophile's mansion, awaiting his arrival to be deflowered tonight (God! That sounded so kinky) I could no longer hold back my wrath.

My strings of curses had only just begun when the door slammed open and in came the pedophilic chancellor, a strong stench of alcohol in the air.

Oh Hell.

"Oh my pretty darling," the chancellor slurred, "Come to me, I shall have you tonight."

He walked towards me in a wobbly pace, his stinky breath coming in small spurts, and I was running around the room to avoid his touch. "Dearie, (hiccup) why are you running away?" He grumbled, "It is our first night. Let us enjoy it together."

"Don't you dare come near me!" I shrieked as I sprinted around to avoid the drunken chancellor. Oh God! Should I knock him out? He wouldn't remember anything if I did, would he? I thought.

As he staggered and stumbled around the room while chasing me I couldn't think of any other brilliant ideas other than knocking him out cold. So in haste, I browsed the room for a baseball bat, but obviously no luck there. Hence instead, my eyes settled on something similar. Without so much as a second thought, I grab hold of the beautiful antique nightstand lamp and swung it in the air with the intent of a home-run. "Take this, you disgusting pedophile!"

I heard a loud "AHHH!" followed by the thudding sound of a body hitting the ground. But let me tell you the fun fact; my lamp did not hit anything. Like nothing. Totally Nada. So did the drunken fool stumble and fall?

In sheer curiosity I, who had been swinging my nightstand lamp blindly opened my eyes to find the chancellor on the ground, lying in a massive pool of his own blood. And a masked man with a bloodstained sword stood before me.

A moment, it took me more than a moment to register what had just happened. But when the chancellor's warm blood touched my bare feet, my mind finally caught up to the horrific scene displayed before me. And I shook in fear.

The masked man, who was probably an assassin, took an agile step towards me. And I took a step back consecutively. His attire was discernible from the darkening gloom and theatrical but shabby. A dark cloak covered his entire form and he looked like he was gliding in air as he made his advance towards me.

My legs were frozen into place and fear was coursing through my veins. I could feel the sweat drench my skin, the throbbing of my own eyes and the thumping of my heart against my chest. My fingers were curled into a fist, nails digging into my palm as I stared at the dark figure in utter horror.

The masked man stepped over the chancellor's body and made his way towards me, acting as if the chancellor's corpse was nothing but a piece of meatsuit. His steps, now bloody with the chancellor's blood as he moved closer. Hesitantly, I glanced at the dead corpse and then locked my gaze dead into his eyes.

They were the eyes of a hunter framed in the passionless face of an executioner. I will not deny, I was scared shitless but.... I don't want to brag that no one could hide from my razor-sharp eye or whatnot, but needless to say, I could recognize those lazy nonchalant sea-green cold eyes anywhere. I don't know, call it instinct, I felt that I could recognize this guy's aura even if he were to hide amongst the thickest of crowds.

"....Reuben...." There was a flicker of alarm in his eyes which he masked with indifference in the next second. I did not mean to say his name out loud, at least not in front of him. But my stupid mouth refused to keep it down. Any chances of me getting out of here alive were close to zilch now that he knew I discovered his identity.

I gulped in fright when his broad figure loomed over me looking very much like a messenger of death. "...How did you find out?" His raspy voice resonated through me.

"...I...I..." Damnit! Stop stuttering.

"Never mind how, now that you know who I am, I can't let you live." He said, his voice still as hoarse as a raven.

Sh*t! If I didn't think of something fast, I was as good as dead.

He was about to brandish his sword around to chop off my head when I screamed, "Please don't kill me I'm still a virgin!" (What! I had nothing better to say)

He stopped in his tracks for a moment and I had never been more thankful for being a virgin. "Err...and why should I care if you are a virgin?" He frowned, but there seemed to be a hint of hilarity in his voice. Or I might just be hallucinating in fear.

"Erm...errr....I, I just don't want to become a virgin ghost, that's all. Do you know how vengeful virgin ghosts are? They are like super scary and stuff and they can't stand lovers because they themselves died before doing the deed you know. I just don't want to be as pitiful as them, not that I pity them or something like that. It's just super sad and I don't want to end up like them." Oh God I was babbling. Please don't kill me! Please don't kill me!

"...Hmm! I see you really despise being a virgin. How about I help you lose your virginity and then, can I finish you off?" His voice now was filled with glee. So were his eyes. What! Of all the... I had to get stuck up with a pervy murderer. Just my luck!

"N-No thanks." I stuttered back.

"Then there's nothing more I can do for you." He shrugged and pulled his sword out in a killer stance.

"NO STOP!" I yelped in anxiety, "I-I can help you cover this up." I offered when I was at my wit's end.

"And why...would I even trust you?" He raised a nonchalant brow. Damn, obviously he wouldn't trust me. To him, I was a troublesome stranger and nothing more than a disposable piece in the game.

"Wait wait, I...I can help you get rid of duke Ronales." I blabbed out in haste.

He eyed me cynically to that, "And why would you sell out your own father?"

"Because I am not Elizabeth Ronales." I replied almost immediately and he shot up in alarm. I could almost imagine him raising his eyebrows in surprise.

"....You're not....?"

"No. I am the personal maid of Lady Elizabeth who was sent in the guise of the lady since Lady Elizabeth eloped with her lover." I said, trying to look a bit braver than I felt. If looks could kill I would have died at least ten times by now. I could feel his intense gaze on me, his eyes scrutinizing my every move, as if trying to analyze my entire being. I couldn't help but squirm under his hard stare.

"If your words turned out to be the truth, you do know that your lord would be stripped off his title and property and you most probably would be executed, right?" His tone was flat and there was a cool detachment in his eyes. The cold bastard.

"Yes, I'm aware."

"Oh, I see you're suggesting you're prepared to betray your master. Is that it?"

"Yes. That is what I am trying to insinuate." If you are not too dumb to read between the lines. Heck! I even directly suggested it. What are you, retarded? "I can help you take down Duke Ronales granted my life is spared."

"Hmph! And you think I will trust you? A servant who can betray her own master so easily?" He raised a skeptic brow. God! What was with this guy? Why was he so fixed on making all of this my fault? Did he want to kill me that much?

"(Sigh) Look at the big picture here, will you? I don't care what you think of me, but I'm not someone who is ready to lay down her life for a master who is willing to sacrifice me without a second thought. It is only rational, isn't it? And I know your king is just as eager to get rid of Duke Ronales. It's a win-win situation. So why don't we make a deal here and we can kill two birds with one stone." That was my only card. I had nothing else left under my sleeve to bargain my life with. I looked into his eyes, trying to be bold and silently praying that he would take the bait. "What do you say?"

"....You do realize that your head will fly if you are to betray me or are to be discovered as an imposter right?" He asked in a quiet voice.

"I'm aware." I nodded once. It was really hard to not cower in fear in front of this callous man, but I somehow managed.

"If you are exposed, I shall not take responsibility for you. Are you fine with that?" He asked.

"I am prepared. All I ask of you is a quiet get away from this royal chaos after I'm done with my part of the deal." I replied in a resolute voice.

"Very well then." He said, "We have a deal. Now scream."

"Huh!?" For a second I couldn't comprehend what he meant and frowned in unreserved confusion.

I think I saw a tinge of amusement there at the corner of his would-be sombre eyes as he uttered in a dreary voice.

"Scream for me, Fake Lizzy."