The curtains are suddenly opened, and I open my eyes as best as I can to squint at the source of my annoyance.

Rachie, completely unbothered by my growls and mean air, sets her half-drank homemade iced coffee on my bed table as a "peace offering" for me to have. I grab my glasses, sit up in my bed and take a sip, already half forgiving her.

"You were supposed to be at my place an hour ago!" she says a bit too animously for my tired brain. "The clothes are stinking up my basement and mom is starting to complain…"

She abruptly stops talking to stare at me instead, catching me mid-yawn.  She sits crossed-legged right next to me, frowning. I know she sees right through my tiredness, and I can't use Willy as an excuse ever since I started sleeping with earplugs and ambient rainforest sounds. The truth is that I spent half the night talking to Sarah, then I spent the other half wondering what it is that could possibly make her so cute. I stare back for a few seconds, stretching my arm to place the coffee cup back on my bed table. 

I breathe in. Patiently, she waits for me to talk and I know there is no getting out of it. I hesitantly begin telling her about how Sarah and I have been calling and texting every night and how well we have been getting along. The more I try to explain how I feel, the more guilty but relieved I am. Rachie's smile gets wider and wider until I feel I should also be happy and I can’t help but to shyly smile back at her. 

Excitedly, she jumps up to her feet and begins to walk around my bed, diziying me. I take another sip of coffee, eyes half closed, as she already imagines what my whole life with Sarah would be. She sits back next to me, and she explains her idea of my future as I lay my head on her shoulder. She puts her arm around me, expressing how wonderful she thinks it is. In her head, Sarah and I are already married.

Somehow it all feels so wrong. These two girls were not meant to occupy my headspace at the same time, and it bothers me a bit to think about Sarah while Rachie is here. I try to get rid of the idea, but the guilt persists.

Rachie is already making plans for Sarah and I to hang out together next week, creating parties that could happen before the end of the summer and making up other excuses for us to develop a relationship “organically and beautifully” (her words, definitely not mine). I look at her in silence, unwilling to let her know I am actually looking forward to it a bit, yet also unwilling to let her know I am also dreading it a bit. All I can do is to toss one of my pillows at her and, laughing, she eventually gets up to pick something for me to wear, abandoning the pillow on the ground. 

“You two would be great together, you know.”, she finally says in a more serious tone. Not waiting for me to answer, she drags me out of my bed on which she’s already throwing some of my clothes for me to put on. My almost finished iced coffee in hands, I’m beginning to wake up a bit.

Once dressed, I head upstairs to hug my dog and let my parents know I’m leaving. Rachie and I walk to her place, and her excitement is contagious. Maybe I should be more happy that I may finally have got someone as great as Sarah in my life. This should be a good thing for me.

For the rest of the day, Rachie won’t stop talking about my love life, barely letting me put in a word as we eat and wash the clothes. She’s doing it again, but I know she doesn’t mean any harm. 

As we hang the clothes to dry outside, she explains her first plan to me. It still feels weird, but I can’t say no to Rachie when she’s that hyped about something.

***

I leave as the sky begins to turn pink, hugging Rachie before going home. I let her know I’ll come and pick the dry clothes up tomorrow, and she waves at me until I turn the corner down the road.

As soon as I get home, I get the notification on my phone that a new chat group has been created. Rachie already renamed it with too many emojis and gave us all terrible nicknames. She is asking when all of us are free for a movie night, and before I can even answer Sarah texts me to ask if I’m going.

I can’t help but to smile.