ONE would have thought I would have learnt my lesson and left her alone, but there I was again, sitting in my usual spot. Labrinth's 'Still Don't Know My Name' was playing through my earphone, while I tried to read a novel on my phone. I had come late that day, because my class had finished in the evening that day. Knowing fully well that I wasn't going to pass the first sentence, I switched to Instagram. I wasn't one to chat often, so my WhatsApp was one of my least opened apps. My most open was my pdf reader and Instagram.
I crossed my left leg over my right, leaning on the back of the chair and was about to start staring immensely at my 'mysterious crush', when someone sat close to me. Pretty close if one may ask. Feeling the person's presence so closely, I moved a bit and then looked at them. It was a guy, a fair looking guy. His really dark hair was shaved to a faded jerry curl, making his slim features quite more obvious. "Hey," he said with a smile.
Not wanting to be mean or anything, I tried to return his smile back, trying to make it convincing. "Hey," I replied.
"My name is Jason," he said, stretching his left arm to me.
I took him arm politely, shaking. "Celia."
"Fine name for a fine girl," she said so confidently, with a smile.
I smiled awkwardly, not feeling flattered in anyway by his compliment at all. "Thank you," I replied him, trying to maintain not trying to seem rude or be rude.
"I've been noticing you for a while now, you just come to chill ehn?" he asked.
I wasn't really in for the whole question and answer thread, and I knew if I did answer that once, he was going to keep more questions coming. So, I simply nodded my head, turning to look at her.
"Cool, cool," he said. "I think you're cute, and I would like to get to know you."
I didn't turn to look at him, as my mind was being dragged away from him or whatever he had to say, to the pretty goddess before me. But, the human being beside me didn't let the damn moment last as he began to snap his finger before my eyes, causing his rings to click and bring me back. "Hey," he said. "I'll like to know you better."
I could feel my blood begin to boil. "I have a boyfriend," I said quickly, trying to shuu him.
"Ah, that's what you all say. I know it's a trick nah." His voice was beginning to become really annoying.
I groaned a bit, turning to look back at him. "Well, this girl isn't lying."
He shrugged. "Didn't say I wanted to be your boyfriend anyways, just want to get to know you, and you me."
"Well, not interested," I dismissed him, turning away.
He didn't say anything again, causing us to sit in silence for a while before he got up and left. It was like he had been blocking all my fresh air and fresh air began to fill where I was seated. So, I shifted my attention back to her.
She had a sky blue polka dots off shoulder top on, with a blue denim Jean on. Her long hair was in a twist out, causing her to have to push a strand behind her ear every now and then. It was so attractive whenever she did it. I felt a smile creep it's way to my lips as I watched her, flipping my long blue box braids.
It was pretty much dark, and most people had gone but I could still see the guy who had approached me staring at me from quite a distance. Ugh, creepy much. I tried to avoid looking at him, looking around instead. It was pretty dark and I was itching to talk to her, but for so many reasons, I didn't want to do it with the guy watching me. Fortunately for me, some dude came and exchanged pleasantries with him, pulling him away. I sighed in relief, noticing how almost empty the place was as I stood up and began to make my way towards her.
She didn't notice me as she kept on painting. When I got close, I noticed she was drawing a Gazania (African Daisy). She was paying attention to every detail, using her small round brush to touch here and there. Standing there, I began to wonder why she painted only flowers? Was that the only thing she knew how to paint?
"Nice painting," I finally muttered after a while, causing her to notice me for the first time.
Her head snapped to my direction, while her eyebrows raised in realization. "Thank you," she muttered as she frowned a bit. I felt my heart warm up at her gaze, feeling my cheeks and neck tingle. I felt so tingly everywhere, under her gaze. It made me so conscious.
I nodded, then shocking myself, said, "Why won't you paint me?"
Her frown deepened as she moved uncomfortably on the plastic chair she was sitting on. "I've told you I don't do such. So, can't you please leave me?"
They were just words, but they sank deep, killing me softly. "I just want to be your friend," I muttered, looking away from her and down to the tiled floor, trying to fight the uneasiness I felt from her rejection and words.
"Well, I'm not searching for friends. So, please leave me alone and stop coming around. It's really uncomfortable for me."
It was like every word came with its own shape of blade, slicing and tearing through me.
Rejection wasn't something I was new to, but coming from her, it was hitting differently. It was like I was crumbling from within. It was like my world was crashing right before my eyes. "But why?" I unconsciously asked, disbelief clouding my mind. "It's not like I mean any harm." I looked back at her.
She sighed, sloping her shoulders. "Just stop bugging me ehn. Thank you," she appreciated and began to pack her things, not bothering to finish with her drawing, leaving me to stand there, watching her.
I didn't have words, so I simply stared. I didn't know how to react. She had politely rejected me, even begging me to leave her, but why did it feel like it was so aggressive and my world was coming to an end? Why did it hurt so much?
Not wanting to physically cry, I turned and began to walk away slowly, my mind getting flooded with the rejection.
As I walked, I prayed I didn't bump into anyone I knew at the access bank front crowd, or at the new hall crowd. I simply wanted to get to my hostel at New Hall, and go to bed. I didn't need any problem at that point in time or any form of familiarization. And fortunately for me, I jammed no one.
I walked straight to my room, not answering my squatter as I went straight to bed with my full cloth still on, increasing the volume of the electronic music I was listening to, hoping to shut the world out.