Breathing is something that comes naturally to us. We don’t really gotta think about it, just breathe in and breathe out. Cliff however couldn’t breathe properly from all the emotion rumbling in his mind.

The anger from seeing Gowan and that woman. The sadness from losing his job. The guilt from saying such atrocities to his boss and crush. He hugged his knees once more as he leaned back at his front door.

Gowan looked back at Cliff’s house one last time before picking up the purple pillow. He walked away from the petite man’s home with anger and sorrow painted on his face. None of the body guards said anything, they have never seen their master so vulnerable and in anguish before.

“Let’s get to the plane...I’m tired.”

It was 10 at night, the sky was a dull shade of dark gray. All Gowan could do was stare at his feet as he walked. Once they reached the park, Gowan took a quick look around him.

The park was empty...the grass was wet. None of the trees whispered the rustle of leaves which rendered the world silent. The silence choked Gowan but he continued forward.

He passes a patch of grass and stops dead in his tracks.

“Sir Westerly are you alright?” one of the body guards said.

He stared at the grass that he and Cliff sat on earlier that day, the day the feeling was still there. “I am fine.” He said before continuing to walk through the park.

He could remember all the people they passed by, the people Cliff spoke to like they were all his long lost friend. He remembered the elderly couple that they passed by at the store. All Gowan could do was clench his fist and move on.

Cliff on the other hand was not doing so well either. He stood up from his position and walked sluggishly to his room. He crashed on the bed and continued to cry.

“Why...did it have to be like this? Did Gowan ever care about me…”

He clutched his pillow and used it as tissues to wipe his tears away before lying on his back and stared at the ceiling. Memories started to flood back to him.

The asphalt road that he and Gowan walked through, the smell of the evergreen pinewood. He yearned for it all to come back. “I just...want to rewind time...to...when I didn’t become his assistant…”

He remembered that he’d treat Gowan to burgers and fries today and started to tear up again. He couldn’t get the man’s gaze out of his mind. The way he lay there beside him while looking at the baby blue of the sky. “I just...want to go back…”

After a moment, Cliff finally had enough strength to stand once more. He wanted to go to the place where it all started to go downhill. 

The place he lost himself. 

The place he lost Gowan.

The rungs of the ladder were all too familiar to Cliff. Each step of the ladder getting heavier and heavier until he broke through to the treehouse. 

Cliff took a look outside the window and saw the clouds clearing up. He held his arms around himself and imagined they were Gowan’s arms around his body. 

He fell sideways onto the mattress as moonlight shone from the open window.

The moonlight hit Gowan’s face as well. He and his bodyguards finally reached the jet. The walk to the jet was painful for Gowan. He tried to look beside him as he walked through the evergreen pinewood.

But alas, he did not see a petite male standing there and smiling from eye to eye.

“No...I-I must...go home now…” Gowan whispered to himself. He and the other bodyguards boarded the jet and Gowan went back to his private room.

He crashed onto the seat and closed his eyes. After a deep sigh, he heard the jet engine start to hum into life.

Gowan opened his eyes and glanced down at the purple pillow he was still holding on to. He finally heard his parent’s voices again. The echoes of his mind got louder and louder. “You’re worthless, no one loves you! You are not allowed to cry!” These words echoed in his mind.

He opened his eyes once more and looked out the window. The view was surreal. He could see the whole city from where he was looking. He saw everything, the park, the stores...the treehouse…

He remembered his old home...house. He remembered the mansion he lived in. He had so many maids, so many hearts he broke but still felt empty. 

“Maybe...Clam Shore...would be...my real home…”

He looked in front of him and the answer was right there. Gowan sharply took a breath in.

He saw the bag of strawberry flavored gummy bears.

The warm feeling inside Gowan started to grow again. “Th-this feeling...this is…” He grabbed the gummy bears and remembered the way Cliff gazed at him as he got it.

He looked down and saw the purple T-rex pillow once more and he could see Cliff leaning close to him again, so close that he could visibly see each freckle on his face.

“This feeling...is it…”

Gowan looked out at the window again and stared at the treehouse.

“The feeling of home?”

His body was on fire now and his face started to go red. The butterflies in his stomach started to flutter and he knew.

He knew he made a horrible mistake.

“ I need to go back!” Gowan stood up from his seat and left his private room with the gummy bears and the pillow.