~Rhett~

I wish he knew. 

I wish he knew I’d do anything for him. I’d stop all this to protect him. I’d let them take me all over again and remind them over and over with sparks of laughter that no matter what they did to me, I’d never tell them about the crystal between his wings. It's covered by smaller feathers and you’d have to be staring for a really long time to notice… which I totally wasn’t doing… but that's his Gifted weakness. I don’t know what breaking it would do, but I don’t ever want to find out. 

My headache starts making it hard to think again so I dig the heel of my hand against my temple and pull one of my legs into my chest, suddenly deciding that's a bad idea with the surge of pain that follows. Niko steps through the threshold of the door with a glass of water in his hand and as he gives it to me, I realize just how long he’s been helping me. Just how many times he’s saved my life. Just how many moments he’s protected me from myself and the people he was supposed to be hunting me for. 

If there’s only one thing I can ever give to him back, it's at least a moment. A single moment where I tell him the truth. No jokes. No stupid comments. Just the truth. 

He deserves that.

It's the least he deserves. 

“Thank you, Hero, really. I know I’m more trouble than I’m worth so it’s a miracle you’re even here right now…”

“That’s not--” I put my hand over his mouth.

“No, let me finish. I need… I need to say this." I swallow hard, trying to stay focussed and not choke on my words, it's been so long since I let myself relax from the tension of laughter. I never had that choice before. "Thank you for being here, Niko.” I say, meeting his eyes, “I know I talk too much and I can never take things seriously… before you came along all I did was hurt people and I know it would have been so much easier for you just to turn me in, you wouldn’t have these people after you and you’d be safe-- but you’re here. Despite my faults, despite how far I’ve pushed you, and despite how many times I’ve… well, forced my sexual humour on you…” I break my gaze from his, feeling suddenly sick, “I know what that feels like now, and I know it's uncomfortable and I’m sorry for putting you through that.” Niko narrows his eyes at me as I move my hand from his mouth as he cups my cheek with his, snapping my gaze back to his. 

“You never made me uncomfortable, Arch.” I’m not sure what hits first, the surprise, "you have three seconds to stop me," or the intense sparks of intoxicating shivers that roll down my spine when his eyes close and his lips meet mine. How many times had I pictured this feeling in my head? How many times did I kiss his cheek on the battlefield and think, shit, just a little closer? How many moments I’d wondered what he tastes like. Well by the stars this is a billion times better. He tastes like stardust and-- if music has a taste--  melody and his lips are so soft and gentle compared to anyone who has ever kissed me in my life. Damn even my mother’s kiss to the forehead wasn’t as soft. 

Oh sweet shadows, I could drown in his kiss. He pulls away for just a second as we both gasp for air and my spinning consciousness lets out a moan of protest, "Do that one more time," and he does, he closes the space between us and we're kissing again as I grab his collar and pull him closer to me before losing my balance and falling backwards onto the bed, grimacing when he comes down with me. Stupid pain. Stupid stupid pain. 

"Mood killer" I mumble to myself as he pushes himself up off of me, still meeting my eyes with our faces inches apart and his wings spread out around us. He’s twitching, it's honestly kind of cute. 

“BytheRift! You’re still injured!” his entire face flares red but I roll my eyes, ignoring the annoying amounts of pain I’m in because this is so much more important. “You need to re--” I pull him back down and let my lips crash against his, feeling as he melts against my kiss. Despite that he seems to relax, I can still feel him holding up most of his weight through his forearms, which are laid flat next to either side of my head. Fuck, he can kiss. “Anarchy--” He pulls away for a moment and I know he’s going to say something stupid about how I need rest and I need to heal and blah blah blah, but I cut him off with a smirk on my lips. 

“Rhett,” now it’s his turn to be shocked, and his face stays in that adorable twisted confusion until I lean up and kiss his cheek and lay back down, not regretting the movement even though it both kills my neck and every bruise going down my spine. Worth it. So soooooo so fucking worth it. 

“Rhett…” Shit, that was hot. Hearing my name on his tongue is just… wow. Though, him calling me Archy or Arch is really fucking cute too, but damn hearing him say my name is just… another level of magic. I can’t help it, he gave me an invite through the first kiss and now I can’t stop, so I lean up and kiss him again, ignoring the protests of my aching body and just enjoying myself as he kisses me back. It's hard to ignore the burning pain that's scattering through my entire body, but he makes it a fuckton easier than it would be without him. "Rhett," he breathes out, pushing away from me slightly with one of his hands tangled in my hair. "I'm serious, you need to rest," he's almost breathless and fuck, is it attractive. Man, I wish my head wasn't spinning and my stupid body wasnt trapped in this seemingly endless cycle of pain. 

"Awe, come on, we're just kissing. What's the harm?" I smirk, leaning towards him again and letting my eyes narrow disappointedly when my lips collide with the palm of his hand. Childish, so I play the game and lick his hand, which results in his face twisting into this partly amused, parly surprised, and partly disappointed expression. 

"Really? Are you five?" I shrug, smirking with his hand still covering my mouth but he’s smiling, so I know he isn’t really judging me-- which I’m not sure it would matter if he did. There’s plenty to judge me on, and yet he never seems to do so. How did I get this lucky, after everything I’ve done? How can he possibly be here, like this… with me? “Arch?” He quickly pulls his hand away and I flinch, recognizing suddenly the shock in his eyes and realizing for the millionth time this morning that there are tears in my eyes and the pain is making my head spin. Everything burns. Being around Niko helps and I don’t want him to leave. I want him to stay here and never stop kissing me because then maybe I can find a way to ignore just how much it hurts without letting myself fall back into laughter. 

A chuckle leaves my lips and I grimace, realizing it's too late as I roll over, trying not to start sobbing. After all those years of forcing myself not to cry for fear of making it worse, after all these years of not crying-- of finding it impossible-- all it took was one night with Niko and suddenly all my walls are crumbling down. 

No, not one night. 

He’s been tearing down my walls for months and I haven’t stopped him. I didn’t want to. 

But right now, I desperately need it to stop.