June got rid of her needle and heroin the next day and worked with her therapist for the next month on whether she should go to college. Together, they wrote down the positives and negatives of the situation. Eventually, June decided she was well enough to try.
June signed up for classes on her computer. She began her college career by taking the lowest level of math offered while simultaneously modeling as a side gig. There were, of course, classes for art, but the idea of taking them scared June. She didn't want to bear her soul and be criticized by others.
It was a very big campus, and June always felt nervous walking around alone there; she was too afraid to talk to people. The feeling of being utterly consumed by a big crowd and simultaneously being ignored by one was overwhelming.
She felt very alone when she saw students who seemed to be the best of friends talking on campus. It reminded her of when she used to have good friends. There were women in math class who sat next to her who were the best of friends. They were the type of people she would have been friends with in high school, and she wanted to befriend them now, but had no words to.
“I bought this makeup the other day that was way too much. Like fifty dollars!” One of the girls said.
“It’s alright girl, you deserve something nice.” The other replied.
June giggled a little and tried to chime in, “This dress I bought the other day was like, seventy dollars…”
But the two girls ignored her and kept talking amongst themselves. June hadn’t spent time with women her own age in a long time. Perhaps she didn’t know how to communicate with them anymore. Maybe they could sense she was dirty and she wasn’t much fun to be around unless she was drinking. June had tried hard for the past month to be a good girl and not take any substances or hang around any boys. She hoped it would help her make some real friends, but it hadn’t.
June had a question to ask her professor, but after seeing students filing in a long line to do the same thing, she lost her patience and left the classroom. The light outside blinded her as she emerged outside on the big campus, hiking her backpack further up on her back and pulling down her dress down simultaneously.
She looked to her right at the big crowd of students filing out of the math classroom through a different door, and saw, as the crowd began peeling away, a man with red sunglasses, a cowl, and a comfy sweatshirt on.
She froze in her tracks.
She was sure it was Mercury.
She dashed after him.
“Mercury!” June called as she was a yard away from him.
He turned around with a look of surprise. She closed the distance between them, stopping in front of him. He was silent for a long moment, and then he slowly asked, “June…?”
She nodded excitedly. She wanted to hug and kiss him-- she found herself reaching out to touch him. But he stepped away from her, guessing her intentions. Mercury shook his head with a little smile. “What do you want?”
“I want you…” June said honestly, unable to withhold her feelings.
He stiffened a little. He joked awkwardly, “Are you stalking me, still?”
June shook her head. “No. I think about you a lot, but I never actively tried to find you.”
Mercury stuffed his hands in his pockets looking down at his feet. “Should I be scared of you?”
June was silent for a moment as a crowd of student enveloped them, creating a barrier of sound between them. After the students passed she replied, “No. I'd never hurt you. I might... creep after you, but I wouldn't hurt you. What about you? Would you hrut me? Do you really have that gene…?”
His eyes were hidden, but she knew he was thinking deeply about whether he wanted to tell her. “Meet me in the parking lot later and I’ll tell you.”
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