To all those who have lost loved ones to the COVID-19 pandemic

(P.S. Merry Christmas!)

Happy-go-lucky girls like AJ Arquette are often capable of finding enjoyment in almost anything, be it building a sand castle in her backyard or simply picking her nose.

But at Christmas, there was one activity AJ would NEVER find boring:

“‘UG TIME!”

The silly girl glomped her mother right as she was beginning to make dinner.

At first, Blaze was caught off-guard by the sudden hug attack and nearly staggered into the nearby laundry room door in surprise, but she recovered quickly.

“AJ, you seelly girl,” Blaze chuckled as she lightly pried her shark-grinning daughter off her. “You should know better zan to ‘ug Mommy when she’s een ze meedle of making deenner.”

“But ‘ugs are awesome, Mommy!” AJ nearly shouted as she wrapped her arms around herself. “Even awesomer zan striped socks!”

Blaze let out another chuckle and ruffled her child’s already-messy hair. “You’re cute, AJ. Now run along while I make ze pulled pork.”

And thus AJ went on her quest to HUG EVERYBODY.

First, AJ skipped up the short flight of stairs to her room and picked her pet turtle Surly up out of his cage, which was located on top of a stool next to her toybox.

The silly girl squeezed the reptile in a tight, almost shell-crushing hug.

“Je t’aime, Surly!” she chirped, giving her pet a little kiss on the head.

Then AJ put Surly back in his cage and ran off, leaving her turtle looking confused yet somehow pleased with himself.

Next, AJ grabbed her oversized coat and scarf from her coat hook, threw them on, opened the door, and began skipping over to Twist’s place, two houses over.

As she skipped, AJ couldn’t help but grin from ear-to-ear as she pictured herself "Christmas polar bear-hugging" Twist and her cute twin sisters. Ooooh, the thought alone was enough to bring gleeful shivers down her spine, the kind that usually made her pee herself for some reason.

As soon as she made it to Twist’s house, AJ knocked on the door...and promptly felt her heart shrink down to her waist once Twist’s father, Frank, answered it. Darn eet!

“Howdy, AJ,” Frank said with a polite smile. “What brings you here?”

Flustered, AJ fixed her hidden eyes on Mr. Holloway’s shoes so he couldn’t see her red face.

“I, uh -- I, uh --” AJ’s voice had become a barely audible squeak.

AJ was super-shy around any grownup who wasn’t her mother, most likely due to the Booger-Flinging Incident that happened back when she was in kindergarten.

“You’re here for Bertha, I take it?” Frank guessed, not showing any sign of having noticed his little guest’s embarrassment.

Slowly but surely, without taking her eyes off the floor, AJ nodded.

Frank unlatched the door and stepped aside to make room for the silly girl. “Come on in, Bertha’s playing in her room upstairs.”

AJ hesitated for a moment, then zipped past Frank, past the entryway, and up the stairs onto the second-floor landing, where she stopped to hug her knees and take deep breaths to calm herself.

“Why, AJ?” the silly girl thought to herself as she panted. “Why deed you ‘ave to fleeck your booger een Madame Golden’s ‘air back een keendergarten? Just ‘ow beeg a dummy-pants are you!?”

But then a couple of high-pitched voices broke AJ out of her self-disgusted reverie:

“It’s my turn with the truck!”

“Nuh-uh, it’s mine!”

AJ looked up the second flight of stairs to find Twist’s twin sisters, Pepsy and Pizza, fighting over a toy dump-truck in front of the bathroom they shared with their big sister.

Perking up immediately, AJ zipped up the rest of the stairs and picked up both of the twins in what could only be called a “bone-crushing double hug”, which made both first-graders slowly turn purple.

“Oh mon watermelon, you girls are ze cutest twins I ‘ave ever seen!” the silly girl chirped in her normal voice, oblivious to the twins’ discomfort. “You should totally play weeth me and Tweesty more often!”

“M-Ms. AJ--” Pepsy sputtered, passing purple and turning maroon.

“--we can’t--breathe--” her blue-hatted twin finished, gasping for air.

Five seconds later, AJ dropped the twins to the floor with a “YIPE!” and clasped both hands over her tushie, looking intensely uncomfortable.

Pizza, whose own rear-end had cushioned her fall, gazed at the older girl with question marks in her eyes, all while Pepsy looked like she was trying her hardest not to laugh.

“What’s wrong, AJ?” asked Pizza.

“My--buttocks--eetches--for--some--reason,” the silly girl grunted as she violently scratched her rear.

Pepsy couldn’t hold it in anymore and stuffed her head inside a potted plant by her and Pizza’s bedroom door so AJ couldn’t hear her laughing. Pizza, on the other hand, covered her eyes; she’d already seen enough butt-scratching to scar her for life.

CREAK!

A door opened down the hallway on the right, and out from it stepped a small, chestnut-haired figure in a yellow dress, with a squiggly scar on her cheek and a small, dark purple cat on her shoulder.

AJ stopped scratching her rear and squee’d.

Tweesty was here!

“Could you please keep it down?” the scar-cheeked girl said, sounding annoyed. “I’m trying to summon the ghost of the Great Pirate Captainess Alice DeFranco.”

“Tweeeesty!” AJ yelled, running over excitedly toward her friend. “Let me ‘ug you like un ours bear!”

Twist could barely react beyond a wide-eyed “uh-oh” before her ditzy friend glomped her to the floor, sending Twist’s pet cat -- a “Milkshake”, by name -- flying on top of Pizza’s head.

“Angie,” Twist said, slowly turning purple. “I can’t breathe--”

~The end!~