Obviously I got up and went after him. It took a minute but I found him in one of the studies. “What's wrong?” I asked reluctantly as I walked in and took off my mask. “What the hell was that?” He asked, he had his mask in his hand and he was obviously upset. He was facing away from me and I knew I’d have to tell him. 

“Listen I get he's your brother, but nobody questions me. I don't care who he is, he disrespected me and my authority in my home, I'm not just gonna do nothing.” I said, trying to get him to understand. “I don't care about the assets, take all his property if you want, what did he mean when I wasn't around?” “When you went off to boarding school he came to visit me a few times.” “Yeah and what happened on those visits?” He asked, I could still hear the anger in his voice. “We had a relationship ok.” “Are you serious?” His voice got louder as he turned around. “It didn't last long, maybe a month at most. Nothing happened ok.” He stopped towards me, still keeping his distance. 

“You expect me to believe that my brother didn't deflower you when you were the only person here?” He asked, looking more hurt than mad at this point. “No gross, he-” I stopped myself realizing what I was about to say. “He what?” “He was my first kiss though.” I said, staring at the ground. This wouldn't be so bad if Riku did not hate his brother so much. They never got along and they had a huge falling out when their parents got separated. Makoto resented Riku for being the son his parents always wanted. Riku hated him because he always tried to ruin things for him. 

“That's great.” He said as he went to walk out of the room. I jumped in front of him and stopped him from leaving. “Hey you don't get mad about this. It Was a long time ago.” “Yeah well I am mad, you know how much I hate him and you had a relationship.” He was almost yelling at this point. “Ok I get it.” “If you got it you wouldn't have done it!” Now he was yelling and so was I. “God Riku why do you care?” “Because I love you!” He yelled at me. The room fell silent as I processed what he had just said. He stopped back and went to the far side of the room. 

“There, are you happy? Is that what you wanted to hear?” He asked quietly this time not to make eye contact again. “I- I don't know.” I said softly, still in shock. “Well I've been in love with you since we were like 5.” I walked over to him and grabbed his hand forcing him to look at me. “I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you, that 's why I made him promise he wouldn't tell you.” “It's fine I overreacted a bit.” He said cupping my face with his free hand. “Besides, you're too good for him.” He said as the room once again fell silent. I didn't know what was happening and I had no clue what to say. I was so deep in thought staring into his eyes that I didn't notice when he leaned in to kiss me.

It caught me completely off guard and I kissed him back instinctively. He slid his arm behind my waist and pulled me in closer. I put my arms around his neck to steady myself as the kiss deepend. He turned around without breaking the  kiss, pushing me against the bookcase. A few books fell off the shelf as he started to kiss across my jaw and down my neck. I caught my breath and realized what was happening. He stopped right by my ear and I would hear him breathing heavily. “Tell me you love me.” He whispered in my ear kissing my neck a bit more.

I stayed silent as my breathing settled. He stopped and pulled away looking into my eyes. Tears started to stream down my face as he realized  I couldn't say it. His heart dropped as his eyes went dark and he backed away from me even further looking like I just ripped his heart from his chest. I started crying even harder seeing him in pain like that. “Riku I’m sorry, it's just-” He cut me off sounding completely emotionless. “Just that you don't love me.” He said harshly, his words cutting into me. “You're  my best friend.” I said putting my hands over my face. “Not anymore.” He said as he turned around and walked out of the study. “No, don't leave, Riku!” But it was no use he was gone and I was a mess. 

I calmed down after a while and went back to my room. I didn't bother going back to the ball, it went off for a few hours and everyone left. After they were gone I went to bed.