8

~A Screed Over Heard~

 “I know it must be hard for you, Cody,” said Mother. “I know you were close to Foalan.” At the sound of her name cold dark sorrow seeped into his bones and engulfed his heart.  Mother left the den and joined Father outside, but Cody lay awake for some time thinking, crying, grieving, remembering Foalan's broken body, feeling guilty.  Why in the WideWorld did I let her go?  He continued to ask himself.  Hugo had just drifted off and Lyn was snoring, but she still had her thinking face on.  Cody had been so close to proving himself to Hugo and Lyn, but he had messed it up, if he got another chance he had to take it, no matter the consequences.  But the real reason was because that was Foalan's last mission, and Cody made a promise that he would prove himself, and not have to pay a price.  But quietly and without risks.  He wouldn’t go the same way as Foalan.  Would that be disrespecting her?  Or perhaps I should take risks.  He thought, I'm done in this world anyways. He rolled over and tried to sleep.  But he couldn’t, maybe I’ll go and say goodbye to Foalan one last time.  Cody had attempted to see her before, but Noctus had been waiting.

Cody had whispered something about wanting to see her but Noctus had snarled. “You and your siblings are the ones that got her into this, if you truly cared for her you should have thought about that before you led her in there to die!”

But Cody wanted to pay full respects to his friend.  He crept outside, but too late, he forgot about his mother.

“Ow!” She exclaimed as he accidently stepped on her tail.

“Ooh, sorry.” he muttered quietly.

“What's up, Cody?” Asked Father as Cody snuggled in between him and Swift.

“Well,” he said shyly “I wanted to go and pay my last respects to Foalan.”

“Mm, I understand,” said Mother soothingly, “watch your step going up the hill.”  He nodded, and made his way across the soft mossy ground of the Hollow.  Watch your step on the way up the hill!  He thought annoyedly, what does she think I am, a kit?  But she was just being nice Cody knew, but after losing Foalan he felt lost and empty.  Cody slowly crept up the hill, casting wary glances at the sky every now and then, checking for crows, although he doubted he would see their black wings against the night sky.  Cody looked up at the stone slab, a hunched shape crouched over an orange pile of fur.  Uh oh, thought Cody, Noctus again.  Well, there was nothing he could do now.

Goodbye my friend

May you pass on, when light is shed of a new dawn.

Whispered Cody, whispered Noctus. Whispered the wind in the trees, and the WideWorld.

When he woke, Lyn and Hugo sat in their nests with grumpy expressions on their faces.  Cody turned his muzzle into the mossy blanket that covered the floor of their Burrow, he thought of Foalan, and how he wanted her to bowl into him when he went outside every morning, and had an idea for a new game to play.  He got up, the starlings chirped overhead and the waterfall bubbled and splashed into the pond.  It was early spring and new shoots of life covered parts of the ground, some were smaller and got less attention from the sun.  Like me, he thought sadly, but in Cody's case it was respect.  He dug up the bigger shoots that were overshadowing the rest and stood back to admire his work, no Lyn and Hugo… no Lyn and Hugo… no Lyn and Hugo, but it was too late, the shoots were dug up, gone, he could not get them back. 

The Hollow was boring without Foalan, there was nothing to do and no one to play with.  He sighed angrily and started to cry quietly.  He went back inside to find Lyn and Hugo talking about their mischief in the WideWorld.  Cody sat in the corner while Lyn and Hugo talked about how to get out again, and maybe go out to find Grandfather.  He slowly inched towards them without showing himself. 

“Could we go out again tomorrow?  Or the day after?” Lyn was saying.  Cody, interested, leaned in closer without being noticed.

“No,”  Hugo said, “I smell rain on the wind, in three days it should clear up, and it gives us more time to think about getting out, and whether or not Cody is to come.”

 Cody was rather stung at this, why wouldn’t he come?  Well, he wasn’t really sure he wanted to.  But knowing that they weren't sure about him coming made him want to come even more.  He slunk to the edge of the den that was still in shadow to listen for a while longer, for the sun was peeking into the Burrow and stealing his shade. 

“He’s not going to come, face it, Hugo,” said Lyn, “he’s scared and will be more work on this kind of adventure, and if we went … you know,” she paused and added ferociously, “would you want to tell him bedtime stories every night?”  This stung worse than ever, like his heart and courage was ripped from his chest.  They don’t want me, he thought.  Lyn's insult echoed in his mind; do you want to tell him bedtime stories every night? 

“Well,” said Hugo, also rather shocked at Lyn’s insult towards Cody, “we should go out in around three days,” he said, trying to ignore the feelings of guilt rising up in him.

 Cody decided to go to bed and think about what they had said, we should go out in around three days, Hugo's words echoing as Lyn’s had.  He curled up and dreamed of a life with no Lyn and Hugo, a sad mother, or more so than she was anyway, no Lyn and Hugo… no Lyn and Hugo… no Lyn and Hugo… this was most of his thoughts anyway, he whimpered in his sleep, most likely just a nightmare said Lyn, unconcerned.  He couldn't lose Hugo and Lyn like he had lost Foalan.  Cody had promised himself that if there ever was a chance to prove himself no matter the consequences he must, now the consequences were bigger than a scolding from Mother, it was Mother, and he had to decide if it was worth it.