I’m off work way before Aiden is tonight, so I went back to my place after my shift. Now I’m wishing I’d gone directly to his place, because this morning's thunderstorm hasn't broken. If anything, it's actually kicked up in intensity.

It’s pouring. Twilight has already sunk down over Ketterbridge, and the daylight has faded away, but every now and then a flash of lightning illuminates the endless eyeful of fast-falling raindrops. The wind is forceful enough to rattle the panes in my windows. I couldn't make it to Aiden’s place if I tried, which means I have to sleep without him tonight.

“At least this won’t be a problem when we get our own place,” I tell my plants, as I add some fresh soil to their pots. “It’s just one night apart. Still, though. Little bit of a bummer.”

It’s stupid that I miss Aiden already, but I guess that’s part of how I know that we should move in together.

I brush the soil off of my hands and reach for my phone, about to text him. I stop halfway through putting in my passcode, thinking I heard something over the chaotic noise of the storm. Someone - knocking at my door?

I open it to find Aiden leaning a shoulder against the doorframe, his hands stuffed deep into his pockets.

“Hi,” he says warmly, bending to brush a kiss onto my mouth. “Sorry to come by with no warning, I was just, um…” He fades off, shrugs. “You busy, right now?”

I break into a slow smile, then drop my gaze to his dry jacket, the dry henley beneath it. All of his clothes are perfectly dry, actually, right down to the snapback. And so is he.

Right. He's a Heliomancer. I honestly forget sometimes. He always exists first and foremost as Aiden in my mind. Who he is, not what he is.

I let out a helpless laugh, twisting the ring around my finger. “No, I’m not busy.”

Aiden smiles down at me. He says something in answer, but his low voice is too quiet for me to hear over the storm, so I put my palms on his chest, lean up closer to him.

Aiden stops talking. He fixes me with a bright, affectionate smile, then wraps an arm around my waist. He backs me into my apartment, nuzzling his nose into mine, closing the door behind us with his other hand.

I let out a surprised laugh and take his face in my hands, not sure what I did to get this response from him.

“Your fingers smell nice,” he observes.

“I was looking after my plants.”

“Of course you were." Aiden straightens up, still smiling, and touches my chin with his thumb. “Sure you don’t mind me just showing up like this?”

“I mean.” I cringe at him, folding my arms over my chest. “It’s pretty rude and inconsiderate and unsexy of you, but - yeah, whatever. It’s fine.”

Aiden huffs out an indignant laugh, then shoves me down onto the couch.

~~~~

The storm thunders against the windows, but inside, it’s serenely warm. We have a full view of the rain from my living room. It’s beautiful against the depths of the winter night, so we leave the lights off and stick to the golden softness of Aiden’s fireflies.

Aiden made us the rose petal tea that his aunt likes, the one with cardamom and honey. Fragrant steam rises from our mugs, making my apartment smell like a rose garden. I’ve got my hands folded around my mug, but Aiden has set his aside and knelt down in front of the couch.

He’s got my foot in one massive hand. He’s examining the cut I got when I was running through the forest, looking for him.

“See?” I ask, turning my foot a little. “It’s getting better.”

“Yeah. Looks like it."

Aiden sounds really relieved about it, considering what a small thing it is. My sweet worrier. I guess it was still on his mind.

“Good,” he rumbles. “I’ll get you some new Converse, alright? Yours got destroyed because of me, so-”

“Babe, I already bought myself a new pair. And a pair of hiking boots, too.”

Aiden blinks at me, confused and surprised. “Hiking boots, why?”

I tap his nose with my fingertip. “So I can go check on your Tree more often.”

“Oh.” Aiden stares at me, then bites his lip. “Well - at least let me pay you back for them? I feel so bad-”

“You were doing so good not feeling bad, man! What happened?”

“I'm sorry,” Aiden groans. “It’s hard for me, okay? But I’m trying, I promise.”

“Stop thinking about it,” I tell him firmly, and he tips his head back in frustration.

“You make it sound so easy, Jamie, but-”

He breaks off as I tip forward and slide my fingers into his hair. I draw his head towards me, and bury a long, soft kiss into his chestnut locks.

We stay like that for a moment. Aiden kneeling at my feet, with me curled over him.

He releases my foot, climbs back up on the couch, and pulls me to him. I cuddle up against him, let out a cozy sigh as I relax back into the warmth of his muscled body. Aiden locks his arms around me, puts his chin on my shoulder.

We sit watching the rain for a few minutes, the wild wind blustering against the glass.

“I still can’t believe you knew, this whole time,” Aiden says, out of nowhere.

The vibration of his deep voice feels so good that it takes me a second to realize what he said.

“What - about Raj’s plan?”

“Yes, about Raj’s plan! I can’t believe you kept that from me for so long. Seriously, Keane, how the hell did you not tell me?”

“I was desperate to tell you, I was dying to, but Raj made me promise not to say anything!” I turn around in Aiden’s arms, suddenly worried. “Are you mad?”

Aiden clicks his tongue, fixes me with a disapproving face.

“Well, it was pretty rude and inconsiderate and unsexy of you,” he answers. “But yeah, it’s fine.”

I blink at him, startled, then let out a loud groan. Aiden’s huffing laughter follows that sound, and he lets out another deep chuckle when I smack his bicep before settling back into his arms.

“I’m not mad,” he clarifies. “Just - surprised. You’re such a bad liar, I didn’t realize you were capable of keeping such a huge secret from me.”

“Yeah, it was work,” I inform him, to another amused little huff. “But I can keep a secret. I’ve kept yours, haven’t I?”

Aiden looks at me with affectionate blue eyes. “Yeah, that’s true.”

Silence falls over us. I can tell that Aiden is thinking hard about something, so I keep quiet.

He stays in his thoughts for some time. I finish my tea and set the mug aside. I savor the sweet taste that lingers in my mouth, the sweet feeling of Aiden's body against mine. I watch another flash of lightning spark beyond the windows.

Aiden speaks softly and suddenly, all in one breath.

“You know, when I was a kid, I…” He trails off, then shakes his head. “Nevermind. You don’t want to hear this.”

I turn around to sit facing him, caught off-guard, my heartbeat picking up. It’s not every day that Aiden chooses to share something from his past.

"I do want to hear it,” I tell him earnestly. “What were you gonna say?”

“Nah, it’s…” He rubs his arm, winces. “It's not a fun story.”

It doesn’t matter, though. I want to hear it.

I ache for him and with him every time he tells me about something painful. But I do want him to tell me those things. I want to know everything, and I also think that talking about it might make him feel better. I’ve already told Aiden so much about myself, and - I've found that it's strangely comforting, doing that.

It's something I’ve only found with him. The few times I tried to have this sort of talk with Roger, things didn’t go well. I was searching for that deeper intimacy. I hoped that I might find it with him. And he would listen to me, but he never seemed to understand me, or what I was trying to do. Sometimes he would laugh it off, change the subject, try to lighten the mood.

That pretty much killed my willingness to even try. Besides, I came away from those talks feeling like we didn’t really know more about each other than we did before, so - there was no point.

It’s how I ended up feeling lonely, even when Roger was right there beside me.

It’s not like that, with Aiden. It's the opposite. Something about his presence, how he looks at me, how he listens, how he answers - I feel so warm and safe within it all, comfortable enough to open my heart and history to him. I know that it’s difficult for him to do the same, but he tries really hard, and sometimes he gets there.

I love it when he does, even when the story isn't easy to hear. The more I know about him, the closer I feel to him.

“Please tell me.” I hold Aiden’s eyes with mine, so he can see the sincerity in them. “I want to hear it. Honestly.”

Aiden hesitates, nibbles his lip. I wait, holding my breath.

“It sounds weird," he begins slowly, "But my memories from when I was a little kid are super clear. My aunt says I had to grow up really fast, and that’s probably why. I don’t know. But I do remember a lot. Kind of ironic, given that huge pieces of my adult life are blurs that I can barely piece together. Pre-sobriety, anyways.”

My heart is already twisting, but I stay silent, watching Aiden.

“So - I actually remember what it was like before my parents split up," he continues. "The way our house was laid out, I could hear whatever was going on in the kitchen from my bedroom. Which meant that I could hear my parents fighting all the time.”

I reach out and put a hand on Aiden’s knee. He folds his fingers around mine, takes a breath before he keeps going.

“I didn’t love listening to them saying horrible shit to each other, obviously. And my room had this dormer window that I could sneak out of and get to the flat part of the roof. So I would take a blanket and a pillow and sleep out there sometimes.”

I tip my head to the side, wondering if this is when Aiden first started feeling most at home sleeping out in the open air.

“So, I knew that they were fighting pretty much constantly," he forges on, "But I didn’t really know what it was about. After my aunt took me in, I asked her about it. I wanted to understand what had happened, where shit started to fall apart. She wouldn't talk about it with me until I was older, but I did get her to tell me little things. Reasons why my parents always fought.”

“Oh,” I manage, struggling to speak. “What was it about?”

“All kinds of stuff.” Aiden keeps his gaze on my fingers, avoiding my eyes. “Mostly about my dad pressuring my mom to use her Guardian powers to do stuff for him. But it was also about how she kept catching him hiding things from her.”

“Like what?”

“Like…” Aiden blows out a heavy sigh. “Before they got married, he told her that he owned the house they were living in together. But it turned out he didn’t, and on top of that, he was ages behind on paying rent. Only reason they didn't get kicked out was because some distant family member of his was the real owner. Like - nothing had been paid. Even the furniture was on a payment plan, and he hadn’t put any money towards it. It was all overdue, tons of late fees, all that. My mom didn't find out until they were already married. Until they already had me.”

“Oh, no,” I murmur, dismayed, and Aiden nods.

“And my dad started coming home really late, every night. So my mom thought he was working more, to catch up on what he owed. After months of that, she found out that he had barely been showing up to work at all. He was just out getting into more trouble, more debt. Which he always expected her to use her magic to get him out of.”

I wince, and Aiden pauses, chewing the inside of his cheek.

“It was all the time. He was always doing stuff she had no idea about. Even shit like - when he was supposed to take me to get a haircut, he just did it himself and pocketed the money. That one I actually remember, because my mom loved my hair, and she cried when she saw what a bad job he did, and I thought it was my fault, for some reason-”

Aiden cuts himself off with an uneasy breath, like he’s suffocating on his words.

“Sorry,” he stammers, his voice scraping a little. “Never - never talked to anyone about this before.”

I squeeze his fingers, telling him with my eyes that it's alright, that he can take all the time he needs.

Aiden gathers himself together, gets some air into his lungs before he speaks again.

“Anyways, all this shit completely changed Leigh. Or - my mom, I mean. Even before my dad walked out. My aunt says that my mom was a totally different person before and after him. Knowing that, it - kinda fucked with me pretty bad. Because I only knew her the way she was after him, and she was, um…”

Aiden fades off again. He takes a second, then forces himself to meet my eyes.

“Point is,” he says slowly, “I really like that when I catch you doing things I didn’t know about, they’re always just - nice surprises. Like buying hiking boots so you can look after my Tree. And keeping something a surprise for one of our friends. Stuff like that.”

I’ve felt cut to my heart this whole time, basically just trying to hold it together so I can listen to what Aiden had to say. I’ve been sitting very still, white-faced and silent. But this last thing he says is too much. Especially when I’m staring into those reflective blue eyes, sweet and open, shimmering like spun sugar.

I tip forward and bury my face into Aiden’s shoulder, wrapping my arms around him. Holding him maybe a little too tightly, but helpless to stop myself.

Aiden folds his arms around me, too. We both stay quiet for a minute. The rush of the rain against the windows is the only sound in my apartment.

Then I lift my head, place my hand on Aiden’s neck, and open the connection.

There’s an immense river of love in me, a limitless, inexhaustible fountain of it. I let it pour into Aiden. At the same time, I stare deep into his blue eyes, speaking that way, too.

Aiden blinks rapidly, his grip on me tightening. A soft, shuddering little sound escapes his mouth. I silence it with my lips against his. I take my free hand and roughly slide my palm up his bearded jawline, then grip him by a tight fistful of his hair and bring him even closer to me. Our mouths seem fused together, and the burning glow in my heart is still spilling through the connection in vast waves.

We break apart, and I let the connection close. Aiden lets out a long, shaky exhale before he opens his eyes.

I can barely breathe for loving him so much. I can't look at him, so I turn and put my back against his broad chest again, fitting our bodies together.

Aiden is motionless and quiet for some time. Absorbing what I just silently told him, I think. Considering his response.

My head is tilted slightly to the side, and Aiden - he leans forward and sinks his mouth onto the exposed, sensitive skin of my neck. I stop breathing, halfway through an inhale. I can feel and hear my racing pulse, beating beneath Aiden’s lips. Feel the warmth of each breath against me, the familiar, intimate tickle of his beard.

I hold perfectly still. Aiden stays like that for a long, breathless moment, then draws back. He slowly places another, simpler, gentler kiss on the same spot, a finishing touch that sends goosebumps down my arms.

Every time I think that Aiden and I are as close as we can possibly be, he brings us closer.

It’s one of the uncountable things I love about him, one star in a galaxy.