To whom it may concern.
I am devastated by the fact that my current living situation has lead to writing a letter of complaints to the university representatives, but my tolerance towards my present roommate’s actions has been pushed to the edge. I will have to not only notify you about deeply troubling deeds, but also ask you to step up.
My biggest issue, that I would like to adress, is the annoyance from waking up every morning and discovering myself beeing chained to the bed. While I understand that waking up, at least, in my own bad is a big approvement from the times when my roommate was chaining me to the trees in the park near campus, I was still trying to talk some sense into them. Alas, instead of a productive dialog, they continued to hail Satan and threatened me by some nonsense about how they need new sucrifices and me being “next”.
I have also experienced many inconveniences from their guests, some of which tried to cut out some of my vital organs, since they, I quote, “needed extra cash, dude!”. As a freshman, I find it highly distracting and even dangerous, not only in terms of my education, but also my life.
Thus, I would like to not simply ask for a favor of moving me to another room, single or with less religious person, but propose you a deal, as I can help you find where and by whom drugs are sold in our area.
Literally can not wait to hear from you.
Sincerely, Michael Wasoffsky