CW: Abuse / Neglect / Alcoholism

It was like falling asleep and then falling down through clouds of cotton haze. The stream of thought leaking through the door was faint but, once grasped onto, Jace acted as the anchor and guided us to it, keeping us from ending up on different ends or levels of her depth. The infinite void was given finite form and we found ourselves in the standard dorm room, much like any other, aside from its comical appearance. Vibrant colors, living furniture, and random fits of giggling.

I hated it.

When we were in solid forms, it showed us how we really felt about ourselves. Jace was semi-transparent, reflecting the colors around him. I just had no face according to the several accounts I’ve heard so far. The important part was that we were holding energy from the world of the living together in the land of the unliving. It might be more accurate to call it the land of the never-living. Dogmata was the world of thought, feeling, flow, and ideal.

“This is her depth? It’s colorful,”Jace pushed a lamp that was bent over like a pool noodle,”Are you sure this is right?”

I nodded,”We’re at the top of the depth, as close as we can get to her normal.”

“So, her normal is… this?”he tried to open the door only for the door handle to bend away and a laugh track to echo through the room,”Oh ha ha. Just let me in.”

The door took several tries, but the handle bent no matter what was tried. So, instead of playing the game, I pushed against the door. It started to warp and bend, too, until I popped through and fell onto the floor of the next room. It was all the same aside from the lack of abnormality. Everything was immaculately clean and empty as though no one lived there.

Jace came through and I caught him before he hit the ground,”Isn’t this the same room?”

“Yes and no,”I said, checking drawers and the closest,”We’re getting deeper and closer to who Iria is at her lowest. Remember, you are never allowed to mention what you see in someone else’s depth to someone who hasn’t seen it themselves.”

“I never understood that,”he opened the closet door and found nothing inside,”Like, I think I handle my own depth if I can dive into someone else’s.”

“It’s because of the risk. You could end up breaking someone by bringing up something that represents a repressed memory,”I started flipping furniture,”Anyways, there is a door somewhere. Iria’s subconsciously hiding herself.”

Jace looked under the bed,”Found it. There’s a whole other room in here.”

“Great job,”I said, sliding under the bed and landing in the dim, colorless room. The air was cold and a storm raged outside the window.

Jace picked up a picture of a woman, but it was blurry, the edges fading and her features blurred into a skin tone mess,”This is sad.”

"It always is,"I walked up to the closet door and opened it, coming face to face with a child,"The worst memories are the ones we push down until we can't."

"If you keep that open, he's going to find us,"she said.

I crouched and offered my hand,"As long as I'm here, it'll be okay."

"That's what mom said,"she brought her knees up to her chest,"I haven't seen her in a while."

"She sent me,"I lied,"She sent me to take you away from this place, Iria."

She hesitated before taking my hand and letting me lead her out of the closet,”Is mom waiting outside?”

“Only one way to find out,”I said,”Now I want you to hold onto my friend’s hand. If things get too scary, just close your eyes.”

I opened the bedroom door and it creaked open into a house where broken picture frames covered the floor and the wallpaper was discolored and decaying. It smelled like alcohol, cigarettes, and mold, a stark contrast to the room from before. Every step echoed throughout the house as we walked on, searching for the exit. We passed by the front door and Jace tried to look out, into the pitch black,"Wouldn't the door outside be an exit?"

"That is the infinite void of Dogmata,"I started walking up the stairs,"The exit to our world is going to be the point of relief and security after the traumatic event took place."

Jace swallowed,"Is this what it was like when you, uh, came into my depth?"

"Each one is unique but that's one of the only things that they have in common,"I recalled traversing his abstract, nonsensical mind,"One day, when you can face what happened, you'll see your own depth. Until then, be patient."

We walked up to a door and yelling could be heard on the other side. I took a deep breath,"Jace, Iria, when we go inside, close your eyes."

"Why?"he asked.

I let the door creak open slowly,"Because I think my dogma is shameful, that's why. I don't like people looking at it."

They walked into the threshold of the room and the atmosphere changed, becoming heavy enough to choke on. It smelled like sweat, stale beer, and rotting food. I uncuffed my sleeves and activated my dogma. Chains, belts, ropes, and cloth strips poured from my sleeves and filled the room while avoiding touching Jace and Iria. When they made contact, they bound the target. It was a man whose features were heavily distorted, and his head brushed the abnormally high roof. He was big, intimidating, and carried a belt as long as a whip.

"I don't know who you're supposed to be, and I hope we never meet,"I whispered, watching the bindings tighten until it exploded into a cloud of dust. I tapped Jace's shoulder once they'd all retreated back into my sleeves, coiled up in the back of my mind,"It's over."