"Nasty patty, bitch. Like you ordered."

"I di'n't order 'dis shet, i ordered a burger 'dat is good for shettin' alone while thinkin' bout me wife who's been on a two month mission at the Shronkey and delayed 'er day comin' 'ome by two fockin' weeks, ye wee scrub, Donkey could'a shite a be'er lookin' one 'dan 'dat!"

"Listen, I'on' get paid enough for 'dis shit. Either you eat the fuckin' burger or you can suck ma dick."

Shrek gets up and starts yelling,

"MAYBE I SHOULD SUCK YAR DECK. FIONA'S PRO'ABLY CHEA'IN' ON ME ANYWAY. IT WOULD PRO'ABLY TASTE BE'ER ANYWAY."

"SUCK IT THEN, BITCH."

"A'RIGHT COME 'ERE"