Ben's POV
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How lovely." I heard my Mistress's voice say. I twitched, but I didn't open my eyes. The warmth surrounding me would surely disappear where I'd be brought back to reality.
A reality where I was laying my head on Phobus's shoulder and drifted away to sleep, and a reality where I would have to leave his warmth if I were to wake up.
"He's been through so much, hasn't he?" Phobus asked after an awkward silence, his voice layered with sadness. I cringed internally as they spoke of me because I was not sure whether my Mistress would spill my secrets or keep them to herself.
"I'm afraid it's you who has been through much more, dear Majesty." My Mistress spoke in a careful, yet knowing tone.
"Please, don't call me that," Phobus insisted firmly, feeling him tense beneath me, " I'm not a king of any sort, so just-"
"Oh, but you are, and I am astonished that you do not recall such...information. About yourself, of course."
The room became quiet, remaining so for some time and my body chose that moment to make my stomach growl. Loudly.
To say I was embarrassed was an understatement.
"Hey, Ben...wake up," Phobus whispered gently, placing his warm hand on my shoulder and shaking me likewise.
There was no use pretending to be asleep any longer, so my eyes fluttered open and I gazed into the eyes of ember belonging to Phobus. I yawned a bit before looking around my room and meeting my Mistress's knowing eyes.
No doubt she knew I wasn't actually asleep. She knew I had heard her, but all she did was let us know that dinner would be ready in a few minutes and curtly walked out of my room, leaving Phobus and I to ourselves.
I could feel Phobus looking at me, his piercing eyes doing little to calm my racing thoughts. I wanted to talk to him about the night we got caught by the man-lady officer. Explain to him that I wasn't in the right state of mind, but as I was prepared to initiate, Phobus placed his hand in mine, immediately causing me to lose the courage I had been gathering, instead, my breath hitching in my throat and my eyes focusing on our hands, where they were clasped together, firmly yet felt almost tentative. As if by a mere sigh, they would be separated.
A terrified part of me wanted to let go, to explain that I had made a mistake. A mistake where I had found myself vulnerable and chose to seek comfort in him that I did not truly desire, but as he placed his other hand under my chin and lifted it, our eyes meeting in an instant, I knew I couldn't do it. I couldn't lie to him. His usual fiery eyes had simmered to a flicker of warmth and longing, where I knew that I had to choose my next words carefully.
But I didn't talk. I didn't dare say anything that would ruin whatever this was. Instead, I intertwined his hand that was still under my chin with my other unoccupied one, and placed it on my cheek, choosing to go in a drastically upsetting way.
I closed my eyes and opened my mouth slightly, whispering a spell that I had learned recently.
It began immediately, as memory and memory of my past became projected into Phobus. My caretaker, his absence, my pain, and longing. What my job consisted of was also shown, and the scenes of blood became apparent. I made sure not to hide anything. I showed him my life.
I showed him me.
I didn't realize I had been crying until the spell concluded, where I felt a fresh tear fall onto my lap. I didn't dare say anything to explain to him what I was. I didn't want it to sound like I was making up excuses. I only sputtered one word over and over.
"Sorry...sorry...sorry..."
But I didn't hear anything. I didn't feel him leave. So I opened my eyes and was shocked to see that Phobus had tears in his eyes. I had shown him me, and now...he had endured it. The pain. The consequences. The constant bloodshed. It had gotten to him...and he was still here.
I felt like laughing.
Like crying.
Like screaming.
But instead, I leaned over and hugged him, unclasping our hands in doing so. He didn't hug me back at first, but after a few seconds, his arms circled my body and pulled me close to him, where we both cried quietly, only sniffles being the sign that we were indeed crying together.
I relaxed into his touch, and I thanked anyone who could hear me because thanks to whatever had brought Phobus into my life had lead me to do something for him that I had wished dozens of times that someone had done for me.
To comfort him in his times of need.
To listen
To stay.
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