When we had dinner, I saw him again at the table.

 Mom told me to come say hello to my cousin.  I didn't even have time to be surprised, quickly stood up.

 "Cousin."  I bow my head and greet him right ritual.

"Younger cousin doesn't have to be polite!" His voice was warm and kind. The sound kept hovering above my head, making my face suddenly turn red.

Lifting my eyes slightly, I met my cousin's deep eyes looking at me, I was startled and lowered my head very low. In my heart, I secretly rejoiced, because before coming here, I also put on a little makeup, applied a little lipstick and a little eyebrow.

 In the dining room, the voices of the men were very loud, including their cousin's naturally relaxed yet humble and gentle voice.

I am a girl, lowly status, I am forced to bow my head in silence.

 But in the end I couldn't control myself, glancing at my cousin from time to time. In my heart, I was comparing him with the image of pompous boys that I had read in books.

Sometimes, my eyes also suddenly met his "accidental" eyes, my face was red because of embarrassment, I couldn't stop the fiery flow that was overflowing in my chest.

 When the meal was over, the guests had all gone, I heard from my mother that my cousin would stay at my house for a few days, my heart was very happy at that time.

On the way back to my room, my mind was filled with images of seeing my cousin face-to-face, both happy and embarrassed. While distracted, I accidentally dropped the handkerchief on the ground.

 Just when he bent down to pick it up, the towel was grabbed by a big hand.

 It's cousin!

 He picked up the handkerchief, looked at me, and flashed a bright smile, revealing his straight, white teeth.

 "Younger Cousin, this is of younger cousin."

I shyly glanced at him, his eyes seeming to sink deep into my face! My cheeks suddenly turned red. Until now, I didn't know that I blushed so often. I was about to reach out to take the towel, when I saw it clutched tightly in his hand, as if he had no intention of letting go. I suddenly imagined myself as a handkerchief embroidered with flowers, being held by him in his strong arms...

 I feel so ashamed.

 Not knowing what to do, I instinctively turned around and ran.

 Leaving behind was the surprised voice of his cousin: "Younger cousin, this is younger cousin handkerchief!".

 I did not dare to look back, trying to run faster. I ran straight back to the room. The young servant girl became quick and quick to speak: "Young master, our lady said that the handkerchief is for you!"

It's been a long time since I got to my room, but my chest is still pounding. My cousin didn't run after me, I breathed a sigh of relief, but there was a hint of disappointment in it.

 That afternoon it was unusually red. In the bronze mirror, my face was even redder than the red of that afternoon.

 That night, I carried in my heart a feeling that I could not tell anyone, a feeling of sweetness mixed with shame was clearly visible on the corner of my lips, tossing and turning and having trouble sleeping.

 Early the next morning, I stood in the mezzanine, watching a figure in the peach garden behind the house. That figure sometimes stood still and looked into the distance, sometimes bowed his head in contemplation.

 Is he waiting for me?

 That thought made my whole body tremble with emotion.

Because of my reserved personality and also because of my strict upbringing for young girls, I did not step down from the attic. In my head, I didn't even have the courage to come down from that attic, because, just thinking about it, it's already a sin.

 All I could do at that time was to quietly hide behind the door, peeking in the direction of my cousin's silhouette.

 He was looking at something white in his hand. I guess it was my floral handkerchief.

As long as my cousin stood in the peach garden, I also stood upstairs and stole a look at him. Even in the days that followed, when he left my house, I was still staring blankly at the peach garden.

 The maid girl seemed to have guessed something, she gave me a sneaky smile. I pretended to be angry and chased her out of the room.

 Two days later, I was like a jerk, staying in my room, even while eating.

I wanted to meet my cousin, but I was also afraid to meet him. I am afraid of my affection for the opposite sex. From a young age, my mother often told me that it was a sign of a person who did not know how to keep himself clean, did not know how to be shameless.

 But early in the morning the next day, the cousins ​​stood alone for a long time in the peach garden.

 I don't know if he stood there to admire the view or to wait, deep down in my heart, I still didn't dare to admit my longing and aspiration.

 I'm just a girl. I have no right to choose anything. The theft of looking at him in the early morning is the motivation for my waiting and my smile every day. Of course, I did not dare to reveal to anyone about this act of my great immorality.

 It's my own secret.

 The sun is shining brightly, the petals are still holding the night dew, the fragrance of the peach garden is floating, the young birds are chirping on the branches, in that place, there is my lover. I can smile every time I look at him.

 Early on the fourth day, the figure of his cousin no longer appeared in the peach garden.

 Heard the servant girl say that he had moved out of my house since the afternoon of the previous day.

 I couldn't see my flower-embroidered handkerchief anymore, my cousin must have taken it with me. That towel is like me, always carried by him. Thinking of that, my empty mood was somewhat comforted.

Cousin was gone, the spacious garden suddenly became deserted overnight. There was nothing there that could attract me anymore.

 I threw away the paper kites, nor did I bother to look at the pretty butterflies.

 In my spare time, I would sit upstairs again, where I could look towards the peach garden and play Tu Truong Co.

 The old nanny said that the lady has reached the age of love.

 I asked my mother, what is love, she stroked my hair, her eyes filled with nostalgia, forever without saying a word.

 When my doubts were still unanswered, the matchmaker came to the house.