Their little game transformed into an amazing way to drag the comments out of the users and create twisted arguments. They got convoluted ideas from the community, which motivated Laurence to post bizarre questions and theories. The forum's environment (in a good way) felt like a real intellectual war. Laurence was thrilled to interact with Thomas, who would spark anger out of him and make him thoroughly write his beliefs with just the sole purpose of winning a quarrel. Their performance online was staged, but their thoughts were real. Every day they scheduled the next topic they would dispute about but stay firm on their disagreements. 

It was stupidly fun. 

Over time, Laurence discovered more about his adversary. His name was Thomas, 18 years old, lived in the countryside and had big aspirations to study philosophy. They had a 6-year gap between them and 6 hours difference and 6379 miles apart from each other. While speaking to him on a chatbox, Thomas gave the impression of being a nerdy teenager who probably smelled like heated hormones and sweat. 

However, Laurence still remembered how lovely he found this boy's face the first time they did a video call. Thomas was the first to ask if they could speak through Skype, and as Laurence agreed and accepted the call, he was also pleasantly surprised when he found this young boy smiling from the other side.

"Hiiiiiii, it's you! Well, it's your Skype logo!" 

"Hi, of course. Who else could it be?" Laurence remembered his nervous heart made him go for a dry tone, concealing his true feelings behind it. 

"Woah! Your voice is super cool, man!" Continued Thomas, oblivious of the situation. Eyes bright, as if he saw a celebrity in real life, although the only thing he saw was himself next to Laurence's skype logo. The only nerdy part about him was his glasses and entertainment taste. He had a cheery voice and a great attitude that encourage Laurence to expose himself a little more too. 

After breaking the ice, they resumed their calls and deepened their trust with one another. They were used to calling after a huge argument online, where they would go over the best points and how they felt, making sure neither of them got offended and apologize if they did. But as they started to really know each other, the frequency of the calls increased, and their topics change into personal ones. 

They talked about their families, their dreams, fears, and future. Their cultural differences only made their talks more interesting, as they could share typical meals and traditions from their home country. They also talked about love and how they saw relationships. After Laurence revealed his pansexuality, Thomas confessed he was bisexual and explained his tough journey through accepting himself. These conversations opened their past wounds and made them feel closer to one another: Thomas has had bad experiences in his past relationship with another boy, who made him feel guilty for not engaging in a sexual act. In parallel, Laurence unfolded his struggles with depression and anxiety, how he went to therapy and took regular pills to keep himself balanced. 

Once they said their goodbyes, sometimes Laurence felt jealousy creep out of him. Thomas was young, attractive, smart, with a sparkling personality, capable of dictating his own life however he wanted. 

On the other hand, he was getting older and still performed escapism online, creating spaces for teenagers to discuss irrelevant topics while life passed him by. He lived with his mom, worked as a clerk, and just had taken a year off university because he had to take care of his mental health. He didn't feel like he deserved Thomas, but it was impossible not to like him. And it was impossible not to notice Thomas felt the same. 

But Laurence couldn't confirm it until much later. 

It was 6 a.m. for Laurence, around midnight for Thomas. They had been talking for the past hour. They had lain down on their individual beds, looking into each other's pixeled faces, although both were feeling sleepy. They had stopped talking several minutes ago, but neither felt like filling the space with words. They'd been in this exact position before, almost like a silent competition of 'Who is going to doze first.' 

"Hey," Lau smiled a little, interrupting their quietness with a soft and gentle voice. "Aren't you going to sleep?" 

"You should go to sleep some more," Thomas replied with a playful attitude, emphasizing the first word. He also mimicked Laurence's smile. 

"Thom..." Lau giggled and snuggled. "You need to wake up early tomorrow." 

"I know, but-" He interrupted himself with a yawn, unable to keep his tough appearance. "I rather keep looking at you."

Laurence inevitably blushed, and his smile widened. "You're so dumb." 

"Mmhm." Now Thom had closed his eyes and talked slower. "I'm not dumb." His sleepy voice caused him to drag his words, almost unintelligible. "I just... like you a lot." 

Laurence watched him dumbfounded and lifted his head from the pillow. "What?" But Thomas was already snoring lightly. "Thomas, what?" He repeated uselessly. 

When he made sure that Thomas was completely asleep, he fell again into the mattress with a dramatic sigh and waited a few minutes looking at the ceiling for answers.

As Laurence inhaled, instead of fresh air, anxiety began to fill his lungs. There was no possibility Thomas had smoothly confessed, probably without even realizing it. Sure, Laurence thought, the term "like" was like an umbrella term also used between friends, right? Because there was no way, they felt the same, right? He believed Thomas, as great as he was, with so many plans and dreams, wouldn't settle on someone like him. Laurence bit his nails as his brain continued punishing him for imagining them together, happily dating. He wasn't emotionally available for it either. If his mind was compared to a house, right now, he felt like his house had a broken sink, malfunctioning lights, and no windows. He could barely take care of himself, much less of a partner.  

His train of thought was interrupted by a bigger snore coming from his computer, still showing their images. Thomas now buried his face on his pillow, making his black hair ruffle messily. He mumbled something and changed his breathing into a deeper and slower one.

And Laurence found him lovely. 

"Damn you and that fucking dragonfly debate." He said before ending the call.