7:55pm, Never, Never, Never. One of the many nevers Angel had was never turned down someone he didn't know in face and as a person. He'd turned down strangers but at least he'd known their faces. And because he'd never received love notes before, he'd never had to reject or accept them before.

           So he was practicing lines in his head. None of them were sticking with how strung out he felt.

           After the marathon Coach Brian had asked to speak with him. It was bound to happen. The man knew his stats in high school individually and against the nation, of course it was suspicious that now he was all of a sudden a little more average. Coach told him his intuition knew Angel had been hiding something but he chalked it up to his time in community college shaving off his improvement. Angel apologized not having an explanation (since who Can really explain hiding their talent?) but the man was surprisingly understanding. He didn't pressure him immediately or start talking about the future, or his potential. Although, Angel could tell Coach wanted to.

          The man smiled, smacked his shoulder, and congratulated him. They'd talk at practice.

          Part of the reason why he felt so overwhelmed and shaken up was not only due to winning the race, but his coach, his team, Jeremiah and how he still had to meet the secret admirer. He was organizing two versions of going about this. To turn him down, and if Angel gave him a chance.

           To turn him down it started with an apology, reassuring whoever the guy was that he appreciated him and the writing, and that he wasn't ashamed or grossed out by it. He knew if Angel were the secret admirer he wouldn't want to worry about the receiver of his notes being homophobic or an asshole. It would go something like 'I'm sorry. I'm flattered by all the notes, they were nice to read. But I can't go out with you. I like someone else, I might even be getting over someone else. It's not fair to you. But for a second you made me feel better about myself, so thank you for that. I hope you find someone worth your time.'

          If he was going to say yes and move on from Jeremiah, which was a very small likelihood of about one in a million....he had no idea how to say it.

           His brain was swirling. Winning, Jeremiah, the team, Coach Brian, and this. The letters. He needed more than the shower he took earlier to clear his head.

          "Hey, hon, what're you doing back here by the bleachers? You lookin' for Jeremiah? He left like an hour ago" Venus and Carson were holding trash bags of garbage to throw out.

          "Er, nothin'. I was just...do you need any help?"

          Carson shook his head, glancing at Venus, concerned, "No. We got some volunteers getting community service in and we got most of it anyway. You okay?"

          "I'm fine. Just tired"

          "I'd give you a hug and congratulate you again but I've been touchin' trash" She laughed lightheartedly, "It'll be okay, Angel. Pretty much everyone was impressed, wondering who you were and stuff. All good things"

          The SGA president agreed with her, "All good things. I get that it doesn't feel that way and it's not an easy thing to convince yourself with anxiety, but you did a good job out there. Everything will be okay. And, um..."

          He made eye contact with Venus. She made an audible 'oh', and started walking backwards, "I'll give you two space"

          They walked under the bleachers for a more comfortable privacy.

          "I wanted to talk to you. I think you know I've been crushing on you. I don't like beating around the bush too long. I make it obvious with my...obvious flirting" They both snickered. "And I'd love to take you out on a date. A much better, cleaner, superior date than Jeremiah's offer. Whatever it is, I'm sure mine would be better"

          Angel couldn't help but laugh.

          "But there's still that. I didn't know he liked you, too. I'm bad at sports, I don't have a performance, a marathon or a crowd to say all this to you, but I wanted to just ask and see if I could maybe...compete...? That word feels wrong. It makes it sound like Im trying to win you over. But I think you know what I mean?" Carson semi-frowned, looking at the envelope in his hand like it were a giant boulder blocking off a street. In his way.

          "...did you write the letters?"

          Carson stared down at it and handed it to Angel, "This girl Valeria, she's a friend of Jeremiah's. She asked me to give you this. It's from him. She didn't say what it was but I could tell since you told me you were getting love letters. Didn't think that dumbass had it in him. I should've known. He's not as dumb as he lets on"

           Angel thumbed the opening, but kept it closed, thinking it'd be rude to read it in front of him.

           "I cant believe he asked me, his rival, to give you this"

          Ángel rolled his eyes knowing only Jeremiah had that sheer level of pettiness, "I know he's a dick. But I hope you don't really see this as a competition. Or me, like a prize"

           "Oh, fuck. No. Not at all. I'd fight Jeremiah over a juice box. This is just me using him as comic relief for the nerves I feel"

          Liking Carson would've been much easier. It would make sense.

          ...But his reality was falling for Jeremiah. "I'm sorry, Carson, I..." None of his lines were coming to him.

          "You like someone else?" He finished, knowingly.

          "Yeah. Unfortunately...I do"

          "It's okay. No justification required. Although–" He crossed his arms, his trademark look of determination and flirtation regenerating, "the second that idiot fucks up, the second I know he fucked what you guys have, or hurts you, I'm going to give it another try. All I ask is that you think about it then"

          "O...okay" Angel stuttered, flustered at the proposition.

          "Venus and I are going out to get dinner, you want to come?"

          Angel put the envelope in his pocket, "I think I'm just gonna go to the dining hall. I'm...worn out"

          "Okay, I'll tell her you're not coming" Carson bit his lip like he wanted to add something else, "Good luck with him...

...Or not" He smirked and jogged away towards Venus to throw out the litter.

Angel,

I was going to tell you I've been the one sending the letters, but I assumed you were too tired, maybe anxious and that you didn't want to see me again or have that conversation yet, so I thought I'd do what I've been doing and put it in writing. I meant everything I said. I have feelings for you. I'll say a hundred times or more to get you to forgive me. I'm sorry for what I did. There was something about how real our kiss was that shook me. Like a realness so real, it scared me. I knew I wanted to be with you, but feeling how real this was, I flinched. And then in a stupid hurry, I wanted to prove it to you that I liked you and I nearly said it in front of half the school because it was this desperate plea of guilt, that 'yes, I want you, Angel. I want you and I want everyone to know'. I didn't consider you in the moment.

I'm sorry for being irritating and confusing, but if you were me holding onto us since high school, you'd understand. Let me explain my feelings. I know this doesn't mean you'll accept me, but hear me out.

Tomorrow at the spot, 8pm.

Your admirer since the beginning,
Jeremiah