I can't sleep either in the hammock or in my bed. Finally, I grab a piece of paper and a pen and start writing.

I have to say at least something to him. The first ten notes turn into crumpled papers under the bed, the next ten into scraps.

"Aiden"...

Then I have a stupor, or I think of some kind of banality, such as: "I'm sorry." It's just pathetic. Should I drip a few tears?

I scribble on the sheet.

"I wanted to see you and talk, but I didn't know what to say. Your brother is right in many ways, and we know too little about each other, and I'm not sure I'm ready for more, and neither are you.

I didn't mean to hurt you.

Please do not think that everything that happened between us meant nothing to me.

I'm sorry".

Well, here it seems appropriate.

"I love you."

I don't know why I wrote this. I avoided this and, in general, any hints of love in the previous notes, but here I wanted to write it, so I could feel how this phrase resonates inside.

It feels strange...

I thoroughly cross out my incongruous confession. But I can't squeeze a line out of myself anymore. I fold the sheet several times and leave it in my jacket pocket. I can't decide if I should give it to Aiden.

The storm outside broke out. Tomorrow, my father will have a lot of work. These storms never go unnoticed. The wind is raging, howling in the pipes, and the rain is pouring. But it lulls me to sleep.

I wake up before the alarm clock and get dressed. I'm not hungry, but I hear Laura making coffee in the kitchen. I sit on my bed, take yesterday's note out of my pocket, and reread it several times. I still can't make up my mind. And because of it, I feel depressed as I felt good just a couple of days ago.

I check my bag again just to keep myself busy. I go to the kitchen, but Laura isn't there. While I take a sip of coffee, I hear the water running upstairs - dad must be up.

When I step outside the door, I see Laura walking from Brent and Aiden's shack. They are following her.

Aiden looks down at his feet, and suddenly this little thing pains me. And it scares me for a moment. I don't know what Aiden is thinking or how he feels. What if I tipped the balance?

I understand Brent's fear. Anyone who has tried to commit suicide once can do it a second time. I didn't notice that something was wrong with Aiden. Now everything appears in a different light. But I don't like this thought. Like Aiden is crazy.

I'm so confused.

I shouldn't have started all this. I should've known better. If I had wanted a relationship without commitment, I should have gone to the coast and played as much as I wanted.

But I never wanted that. Yes, I was lonely.

So lonely that I decided to take advantage of another person to cheer myself up?

This is something new about you, Jack.

"Good morning," Brent says. But I can't even hear him. I try to catch Aiden's look, but he's avoiding me. Brent apparently spoke to him. And I have no idea what he said.

Father runs out of the house. "Damn it! That damn thunderstorm has flooded our basement. Laura, take your brother to the airport! I will deal with this."

As I said, such storms never pass lightly.

"Dad!" Laura exclaims. "I haven't woken up yet! Brent or Aiden can do it!"

But father looks at her sternly and tosses her the car keys. Reluctant as ever, she traipses to the car. I follow behind, hoping I could at least say goodbye to Aiden. All my emotions are focused on him, and they are much stronger than all the others.

But without sparing me a glance, Aiden walks past me and says unemotionally, "Good luck."

My tongue is frozen just like my hand with the note in my pocket.

I sit in the front seat, Laura starts the car, and we drive away.

It takes about an hour to get to the airport, but for me, time flies.

I should have talked to him. I don't know what Brent told him, but Aiden didn't look at me at all. I was going to end this, but as a result, it ended before I could do anything. It hurts. Would it be better if I did it myself?

Maybe then I would not have been such a coward at least.

Why am I clutching this note in my pocket? It won't fix anything.

I somehow lost Aiden in an instant. And maybe our relationship was not serious, but the pain inside me is real.

"Cat's got your tongue?" After a long silence, says Laura, glancing sideways at me. I didn't realize how deep I was in my thoughts. I clear my throat and open my mouth, but to my amazement, I have nothing to say. At all.

"I..."

Come on, pull yourself together. Small talk, small talk.

"I..." I make another fruitless attempt.

Laura turns to look at me, and it makes me nervous.

"I slept poorly," I say finally. Laura looks at me incredulously. "The storm..." I sigh. I don't really care if Laura figures me out. I don't care. I can't put on a smiley face and chat.

"Yeah... the storm," she mutters and turns away. She didn't buy it, but I'm grateful she decided to leave it at this.

At the airport, Laura hugs me. I give her a mirthless smile and leave.

Maybe distance will help? Out of sight, out of mind.

At the end of the day, I'm a grown man who got a little carried away. Sadly, it ended up like this. But still, it had come to an end.

It won't be soon I'll let myself remember the first time I kissed him.

I take a taxi from the airport to an apartment. Originally it was my mother's, but then she left to live on the farm with dad. Now I use it, and it's pretty convenient.

I hope that here I can forget. Nothing here will remind me of Aiden. I need to go to the university, take the schedule... In general, I have a lot of things to do for the next month. So I'll quickly come to my senses.