I can't believe the olympics is already over! It went by so fast. I think it's the first time the olympics have gone that fast. I have to thank Enrique for that. Yesterday his team and him had to leave the olympics. I felt emotional. Usually I don't feel like that when I have to say my goodbyes. The only time I do is when I have to leave Nevaeh for a long time. We don't get to spend a lot of time together since she lives in L.A and I live in Nashville but she bought an apartment 1 year ago to be closer to me. Sadly, she rarely lives in her apartment because she is an actress that works in L.A. Besides that I got emotional when I made my first olympics but I haven't since. I learned how to get my emotions in check. I'm currently in the plane to get back home. The olympics didn't go as planned since I only won two silver medals. I'm sure the media will ask me even more questions when I get back home. My parents, my siblings and Nevaeh are waiting for me in the airport. Ouff... I don't even want to start thinking what my mom and dad will tell me. They'll probably tell me an earful about how it's rude to ignore you're parents calls and also my performance. I'll be sleeping at my girlfriend's apartement because she took a break at her job for me so she'll be in Nashville for a couple of days. I don't really know what to expect. I haven't really thought about Nevaeh my girlfriend... It kinda scares me that I seem to think less about her. She's my girfriend after all... Why have I been thinking about Enrique instead of her. I'm absolutely not gay... at least I think. Oh geez... don't tell me I have a thing for him... No.. I don't, I still like Nevaeh... Well I still feel good whenever I'm with her. Maybe when I'll see her tonight it will kinda confirm that I still do in fact like her. Besides that... I'll miss Enrique for sure. He thinks we won't see each other again. How could he think that. I thought we got along together. He will surely go to the 2024 Auckland Olympics like me. I don't know why he thinks like that. He's better than he thinks. Winning the gold medal should have proved that. I guess winning a medal doesn't represent the same thing for him as it does for me. I'll make sure we see each other again. I can't let go a new found friendship like that but still it won't be the same as being in the olympics. If he were an american it would've been better but he's Spanish which doesn't bother me. What bothers me is that seeing each other won't be easy. I have no interest to talk about him to my family since they'll say he's the reason my performance is declining. And of course not he's not the reason why my performance hasn't be the greatess. I guess I'm in some way rebelling aginst them against the world. I love competeting but that's not the problem. I hate that I'm forced to be the best. I barely have no life at this point. My parents should be glad that even have a girlfriend because they buged me for years telling me it would help my image as an olympian. I appreciate what my parents did for me and my siblings but sometime it is to much. Perfection doesn't exist. My parents sure did think that. Making sure every one of their child is successful in some way. Anyways my spanish friend and I both conclued that our frienship remains a secret. 

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I just arrived in Nashville and I can already see photographers, cameramans and interviewers there waiting for me along side my parents, my brother Ashton, Logan and my sister or should I say brother Thalia. I wonder when I'll have the chance to have a real conversation with him since all the drama. I also spot my girlfriend Nevaeh Steward.  As I get closer, she starts running towards me to hug me and kiss me. I can see the photographers taking pictures of this moment. Nice... when will I have a private moment... What can I say I'm one of the most famous olympians in the world. She kisses me but I don't any spark as I'm used to... I'm happy to see her but I just don't feel the connection with her... Weird... I can see that my parents are happy to see me but at the same time not so much. About my siblings, they are like normal. Ahston hugs me, Logan greets me back and Thalia tells me hello because he's forced to. He can't do anything since my parents are there and the media is there as well. We have to put a facade. They later interview me. It's tiring. I just got back from the olympics and this is what I get as response? They asked a few questions later to my brothers and also miss Steward since she's my girlfriend and an actress. 

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As expected my parents gave me an earful after we had a private moment where the media wasn't there. I'm currently at my girlfriend's place. It just doesn't feel the same. I like spending time with her but now I feel like my mind is else where. Where it shoudn't be. I think I got hit by something during the olympics. What has gotten into me? Why do I seem to care less about my carrer? My girlfriend. Heck! Why do I feel like I want to rebel against my own family and the entire world that follows me? What has gotten into me. What have you done to my life Enrique Martinez!