“No no he would never harm himself.” Puch said.

“Lastly you were a god of love, not Eros or Cupid but you were, and now there's a stadium of gods in the bathroom and I really really- didn’t expect so many gods to be here when we were supposed to be talking privately.”

Jake sighed.

“Yeah I guess.”

“One last thing. You're about to go on an” he started to laugh. “Adventure.” 

“You’re about to see some -weird- shit and nobody is going to believe you.”

“Oh I know” Jake said. “I was told as much.”

“And Maika is coming back to you. Satan wasn’t lying about that.”

“WIthin the week?”

“Should be”

“But there's a reason Zues keeps putting off your quest”

“Oh okay”

“One last thing!” Ah Puch said.

“Okay?”

“In your future you have a lot to look forward to. Your gona pass, your gona look good, attractive and have lots of friends, just know that you’ll lose a bunch, be careful what you tell people. Regarding Maika, don’t tell him your a god okay? Don’t tell anyone. Be careful writing about it, and regarding your diary, if you ever do share it, I wouldn't suggest telling people it’s real.”

“Why?”

“Do you really think they’ll believe you?”

“What about Maika though?”

“Maika. Maika Abend. Really? What do you think he’d do with that information? Manipulate you? Worse. What if he believes you!?”

“Your point?”

“I’ve lost it.”

“Anyways I should get going. Research me and I’ll be in touch.”

“Okay” Jake breathed heavily.

“Alright. Goodnight”

“Goodnight”

Jake said. Later Jake’s ancestor a Native American women who wouldn't give him her name came to him in the shower, and they also talked but outside of that he was off to dream land. Jake Caloway had an interesting adoption. He was a one night stand. His birth mother was probably schizophrenic, maybe autistic, and up in la la land. A ginger with curls and freckles, Catholic according to the story. His birth father was  supposedly 18. His birth mother’s grandmother was Native American. Cherokee Native. Which is a tribe local to Georgia. 

Because of this his adopted family, the Caloways, who were upper middle class at the time, had to get permission from the Cherokee Nation to adopt Jake, and they did. Though he was never truly raised with a tie to this culture. His family who was Jewish kept it away from him. 

Whenever Jake did ancestry work he often found that he had Native ancestors. Which always made him feel awkward as a White practitioner. They did teach him things, like how to talk to objects, and that everything was alive. The ground, the sun, your hair, your computer, that log over there. Many of them weren’t originally from the Cherokee nation, but from others that out of respect for his ancestors we will not name. Jake eventually steered away from ancestor work. But he did find it interesting when he engaged with it and “Little G” will always hold a place in his heart.

Jake had made two online friends. Ross and Eridan. Ross was transgender, born female, and didn’t really do anything outwardly to express a male identity. He had long scarlet red hair, glasses, a girlish voice and only ever really “bound” his chest to make himself look more masculine. This was something that chubby men, who were born male or “male assigned at birth” as the transgender slang goes, and butch women also tended to do so Ross wasn’t exactly completely out of place though he was the size of a stick. The next friend was Eridan who was dark skinned and curly haired and from New Zealand. Both of these friends were made online via Discord, and both practitioners of magic. 

Jake felt very free not having to hide himself anymore. In fact many scrapings of what I know as Raven your wonderful storyteller come from what these two have told me about the ever elusive Jake Caloway. At this point in his life he was tied to a screen and Ross and Eridan were his best friends. Ross was 17, and Eridan 22. Jake having years passed being now 23.

Ah and Jake had talked a few times after the initial shower meeting. It was clear that his life was entering a stage it hadn’t before. This was sparked by Satan, Lucifer, and others he had come to know and work with. Through trial and error he had learned to see spirits, and even through a screen. His friend Ross was in his group chat. One with Look, Ross, and Ross had been struggling. Ross was somebody who his familiars deemed somewhat unskilled when it came to magic. Jake would never dare describe his friend that way, but when you took a look inside his friend’s room for him he saw nothing but nasty parasite after nasty parasite, that all screamed suggestive things like children and looked to torment Ross.

Eventually they found the route of the problem which was a portal somehow instilled in the room most likely brought on by a lack of proper cleansing via astral travels given that’s all Ross tended to do magically. The group talked some and Jake taught Ross how to feed vampirically since the boy was a psychic vampire and starving himself which was leading to depression like symptoms and fatigue, and given Ross struggled with suicidal tendencies often expressing this by “wishing he was a ghost” Jake wasn’t having it, instead teaching him to feed through a screen and offering him up his own energy despite being exhausted. Jake had tons of experience with the type of “zombie” Ross was. Jake also taught Ross to defend himself, which was the main effort here, and what his friend really needed.

Ah came in for a brief moment and Jake said goodbye after his mother screamed at him. It was 3 in the morning and all three people, had been staying up extra late. Well except for Eridan who was very easily in New Zealand. Which Jake had jokingly mistaken for “European” and said “BUT YOU LIKE TEA THOUGH” when questioned about it. In many ways, and thanks to him I have so much info on Jake- Eridan had become what Maika once was on the information front friendship wise. Jake used to tell Maika all his magical secrets, and it wasn’t until it was really insane that Maika stopped believing them. But Eridan genuinely never judged Jake and did love him, and was very very protective of him.

Eridan was Jake’s confident, the one he told his trauma to. The one he told about his romances with gods that haven’t made it in to this tale so far. The one that he told the realities of “My  Exchange” to. Truly and utterly Jake adored Eridan. Like all people in the alphabet maphia, Eridan and Jake often joked about moving into together, and getting a houseboat, or a cottage in the woods where they would sell new age shops, with Eridan’s partner, and Jake making money from his paintings. If his paintings ever one day sold.

But soon after teaching Ross to defend himself, the boys had to say goodnight, and Jake went to bed. Jake clarified this to his spirits as he had an OCD ritual of taking showers before night “I’m off to take another shower” as he got undressed and shook off his elastic undershirt, he felt a warm spirit inside himself. He overheard the gods talking- as he offended tended to. The spirit identified herself as “Wish Giver” he felt her over himself as he sat down. 

“Okay. So we’re gonna take this slow. At first not talking about me. Talking about you. Just nod your head and that will do.” she spoke using his tongue.

She asked a few questions, about how he identified whether male female or other, where his asexuality aligned. Then the questions moved towards more simple things.

“Tell me do you like being human?” there was a pause. On Jake’s end.

“I see you’re pausing. It’s a yes or no question. Just be honest. I won’t judge you.” Jake shook his head no. 

“I see. Do you like being a god?”

Jake shook his head yes.

“Okay so now we can talk. You can answer. But before we get to me. I want to get to you. I want to tell you a few…” she paused. “Things about yourself. And they aren’t all good” she seemed to hesitate. “You’re not going to like alot of what I have to say.”

“It’s fine I’m prepared” Jake mustered.

“Okay. So you were the god of alot of things. Death. Rape. Baby sacrifice. Murder. To name a few. We’re not going to name all of them.” she said.

“Alright. I kind of guessed with Ah Puch-”

“Oh so we got the evil one out of the way!” she exclaimed

“Yeah he approached me. I found him very charming-”

“No he’s bad bad bad bad bad bad!” She said very quickly.

“But he is a part of us. That is a thing. But he’s not a part I like to reflect on!” she continued

“We were also the god of a lot of good things as well here comes the good part.”

He felt as though she was going to say life. He hesitated.

“Ah Puch said I wasn’t a god of life-”

“Well we weren’t a god of “life” that doesn’t exactly line up. Fertility and “life” aren’t really the same thing though often grouped together. But here’s what we were a god of-”

“Fertility. Childbirth. Luck. Love. Pregnancy. Lust. Hope. Creativity. And more” in truth she named about ten things but my sources couldn't name all of them for me. I as a story teller knew many people who knew Jake Caloway, and through knowing him I know the story that I present to you. But these notes are missing many pieces. Because of that I have often as any good story teller does- fill in the holes and connect the dots.

“But here’s the thing about you. I have a…” she paused. “Warning” she said with much resistance.

“Okay?”

“You were the god of alot of bad things. I mean you were literally the god of Hell! Because of that. These things, the gods you were, are going to catch up with you.”

“What do you mean?”

“Humans have concepts known as “Karma” and while some Buddhists swear by it, it’s not exactly accurate. The Chinese got a lot right, the Japanese got some right, and so on and so forth, but no one’s truly been able to pin it down. Bad things do happen to bad people because they do bad things. Good things do happen to good people because they do good things. There are systems in place. But “Karma” doesn’t quite sum it up accurately.”

“So what will happen?”