“Moon?” Keb’s worried voice appeared in Moon’s scary thoughts. They dug their way through his painful memories of every time he had been touched by people unwantedly and found their way right into his heart. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?” The usual questions. Nothing but the usual questions. So many people had asked him those questions before, but in the end, none of them had actually cared about what they were doing wrong. They had only cared about what was wrong with him. “What can I do for you? What did I do wrong?” There it was. The questions that made Keb so different from everyone else. He didn’t see the problem of Moon’s reaction in Moon. No, Keb immediately understood that he was the problem. He had made the mistake that was the reason for Moon’s reaction.

“Your arm,” Moon whispered out of breath, still couldn’t breathe. He hated nothing more than being touched when he didn’t want it. The second Keb realized what he had done wrong, he pulled his arm away and distanced himself from Moon. Instead of apologizing countless times, he focused on calming down Moon first.

“Deep breaths, okay? In and out.” Those simple words helped so much more than what his therapist had done for years. Keb took deep breaths together with Moon. He let him know that he wasn’t alone. That he was not breathing alone.

Moments like these were one of the few that could steal Khem’s happiness. Moments like these made Khem go quiet. Moments in which he was disappointing his parents. There wasn’t anything else that hurt him more than seeing those looks in their eyes. After all these years, after two decades of dealing with his parents’ disappointment, he still couldn’t get used to the looks in their eyes. They broke apart a part of Khem’s heart and made living a little harder each time. The professor, who had hated Khem since the very first class, told his parents, who had come all the way from the North of Thailand to his university in Bangkok, about their son’s misbehavior in his class. He complained, talked badly of Khem, and Khem only listened. He was quiet the entire time, didn’t say a single word. He didn’t defend himself, didn’t fight back when his professor expressed his thoughts of throwing him out of his class once and for all. Khem knew it wouldn’t change anything anyway. It would only give his parents more problems and they would end up being embarrassed by their own son. “We are very sorry about what our son has done.” They were embarrassed by him already. “We should have raised him better. We guarantee he will never disturb your class ever again.” Khem knew his parents were lying to his professor. He knew that they knew nothing could ever change Khem’s behavior. This was who he was. And no scolding, no threat, nothing could ever stop Khem from being himself. He also knew that right at this moment, his parents would do anything for their son to change. Because he was nothing more than a disappointment to them.

“Nong Khem,” Ford called his friend’s name to get his attention when he saw Khem leaving the room his parents had left seconds before him. Khem’s parents didn’t pay any attention to him, just left without even turning around one last time. Ford watched them leaving before he concentrated on the younger friend who looked like he was in desperate need of a long and comforting hug from his mother. Ford had waited for Khem in front of the room of the professor who had wanted to talk to Khem. He had waited all this time just to make sure his friend would be alright. And seeing him now, Ford knew that this time, he wouldn’t be alright any time soon. Ford walked in his friend’s direction. Khem stopped walking and raised his head as soon as he heard his friend’s voice. Khem looked at his friend with wide-open eyes and tried to smile, but there was not enough happiness left in his heart to form a smile with his lips. “Are you okay?” Ford asked a lot quieter than he had spoken before and put one of his hands on his friend’s shoulder. Only after Khem had nodded slightly, he pulled him away from the door to the wall on the opposite side of the hallway with enough distance to the door to not be in anyone’s way and to not be in sight of the professor inside the room. “Do you want to talk about it?” Khem shook his head. He didn’t want to talk about his feelings and thoughts, didn’t want to say out loud how useless he felt. How much his parents were disappointed in him. He couldn’t look into Ford’s eyes any longer, didn’t want to see the worries in his eyes any longer. They made him feel even worse. He felt like he was a burden to everyone. First, he had made the work of a professor and all of his students harder, then he had disappointed his parents, and now, one of his closest friends had to worry about him. He made Ford worried about him. He would be the reason his head was going to hurt because he had thought too much. Khem felt awful and he wanted nothing more than to break down in tears. But right before he could feel the first tears leaving his eyes and running down his cheeks, two strong arms wrapped around his small body. Ford hugged his little friend and patted his back with one hand calmly while the other one laid on the back of his head. Khem hugged him back, wrapped his arms around Ford’s waist. “You don’t have to pretend, okay? It’s okay to be sad from time to time. It’s okay to be hurt. Just remember that you are never alone. I love you for who you are, we all do. Don’t let anyone change that great soul of yours.” And suddenly, Khem didn’t feel like crying anymore.