The town I've been shoved into is alive with people going about their day as if a stranger from another world wasn't just ejected from the castle. People pass by following a cart being pulled by...it's not quite a horse but it looks sort of like one maybe mixed with a rabbit, but in an adorable yet strong way. I have no idea what to call it so I simply watch it go past. The town itself is like something out of a medieval fantasy drama. Like things filmed in some eastern European town. The clothing the citizens of the town also looks like something I've seen in a hundred different fantasy shows.

"Great," I mutter to myself.

"Hey! Hey you!" Someone calls from a narrow side street. "You with the backpack! Stay right there, I'm coming!"

I can't see who's shouting because there are some large wooden crates blocking my view of the side street. The kinds of boxes you'd be expected to smash in a fantasy video game. I have nothing to smash them with and think about running but realize I have a twenty five pound backpack on and if someone intended me harm they probably wouldn't be shouting so frantically for me to stay put. After another minute a football player, complete with shoulder pads and helmet, emerges from behind one of the boxes. The uniform is white with red lettering and trim and the helmet is red with an ax logo and on the side.

"I take it football isn't a thing on this world?" I ask.

"Nope," the football player replies before extending a hand. "Merlin Kapule, Senior quarterback at Rosemount High. Also, I'm a girl."

I nod and take her hand. "Rhys Elder, science fiction writer. My pronouns are she and her."

Merlin nods. "Come with me, let's get away from the gate. I'll give you the playbook."

"Sure," I say as I move to follow her. She's pretty big, taller than me and a lot of muscle. The football gear only serves to make her seem bigger.

"So, you've been summoned to some kind of giant ren fair by magical elves," Merlin explains as we walk down hill into the town. "I was summoned a few days ago and have been waiting ever since for them to do it again. The last two days no one showed up at the gate so I assumed they had gotten what they wanted, a real wizard."

"My screen name is '@WordWiseWizard' online," I say. "I wonder if that's what did it? You're named after a wizard and all."

Merlin stops for a moment and looks down at me. "They call me 'Gridiron Wizard' at school. First female quarterback ever at my school. Some colleges were even thinking of changing their recruiting rules to scout me..." She loses her enthusiasm. "At least...they were...before..."

I reach up and pat her shoulder pad. "We'll find a way home."

Merlin looks at me hopefully and I hand her the mop much to her surprise. "What is this?"

"It's a Sham-Wizard Auto Mop," I say. "As seen on TV."

Merlin is puzzled for a moment before her eyes widen. "Oh! This is why no one showed up at the gate the last two days!"

"It is?" I ask.

She waves the mop a bit. "Okay, so before I was kicked out of the castle I overheard the lead magical elf lady telling the king that they could summon a wizard only once each day for six days. There's me, this mop, you and..."

I hold up the three by five inch floppy disc and read the label out loud, "Assassin's Mead Install Wizard."

Merlin gasps. "Someone 3D printed a save icon?"

"No, it's an old disc...the mages summoned you, then a mop and old floppy disc then me. You said there's six summons?"

She nods. "Two left."

"Was this about the same time you got kicked out?" I ask.

Again she nods. "Yup."

I slip the disk into the outer pocket on my lunch bag. My stomach is starting to hurt from not eating when I hear Merlin's stomach make a noise.

"Sorry," she says. "I've been helping a merchant out for some bread but it wasn't much."

I hold up my cooler. "I have food. We can share."

"Oh my god I think I love you," Merlin declares before giving me a hug. "Come with me. I will show you the absolute best alley to sleep in in the whole city."

"Whoa, you've been sleeping in an alley?" I ask.

"Yeah," she replies. "I don't have any money. People leave me alone because they think I'm some kinda knight."

"We need to find an inn," I say. "Let's eat first then do that."

Merlin guides me to her alley, which is narrow but relatively clean. We each perch on a step, Merlin sets her helmet at her feet, her short black hair is slick with sweat against her tan skin. we share some of the food I made for lunch. I'm not a great cook but it's pretty easy to steam rice and vegetables in a rice cooker and roll some sausages around a skillet.

The sun starts to get lower in the sky and I don't particularly want to sleep on the street, especially with my bag. Someone could try to rob us. Granted, Merlin might be able to scare them off but magic exists in this world even if neither of us can use it.

"I haven't been able to read any of the signs," Merlin explains. "I only found the market by accident."

We enter a square area that surrounds a large fountain. Merchant booths are laid out around the fountain selling everything from fabric to clothing to food and weapons. Some have sandwich board signs set up in front of them. I've noticed a few other signs hanging in front of buildings along the way, none of them were in English but they still looked familiar.

I stare at the sign in front of a bread seller for a whole minute before I realize it does in fact read 'BREAD' but not in English letters. The spelling is English but the letters themselves are futhark runes.

"It's in runes," I say.

Merlin taps her shoulder with the mop. "It's not the newest thing but I wouldn't say it's in ruins."

"No," I shake my head. "The letters. It's futhark runes. Like, old Viking writing. I mean it's spelled in English so it's pretty lazy world building but I recognize the letters."

"So..."

"I can read it," I say. Then I set my bag down quickly, pull out a piece of paper and a pen and write the word 'INN' down using runes. I hand the paper to Merlin. "This. We need to find a sign that has that on it to find an inn."

"Oh! I have seen this before. Follow me!"

We race across town as the sun continues to set eventually finding an inn. Merlin is excited but quickly loses her steam.

"We don't have any money," Merlin points out.

I smile. "We have trade."

She raises an eyebrow.

"The mop," I say. "It's probably the only one in existence. Let's see if we can get a room."

A little while later I'm negotiating with the innkeeper, a woman by the name of "New Look." She's impressed by the mop when I demonstrate how to use it and agrees to give us a private room for the span of a week. Merlin and I head upstairs to our room. She's excited to see a bed. There's only one and I let her have it. I don't plan on sleeping right away. We share some more of the food I have with me as I type notes on my laptop about what's happened.

"Tomorrow," Merlin says. "I'm going to help out at the market in the morning, get us some bread. Then in the afternoon we can head over to the gate to see who they kick out next."

"Sounds like a plan." I look up from my laptop. "Why were you hiding like that? Behind the crates? Looked like it was hard to get out of there and all."

Merlin bites her lip a bit. "I didn't want anyone to see me. Like, if they summoned some Ku Klux Klan Grand Wizard guy? I'd rather he not see me."

"Good idea," I say. "If that happens let's stay hidden. Maybe he'll get eaten by one of those rabbit horses or a dragon. Are there dragons here?"

"The horse bunnies are called 'oryctuines' and they eat plants. There are totally dragons here. I saw Ultra, the bread seller, talking to a dragon egg merchant yesterday. I haven't seen a dragon yet but they totally exist in this place."

"Good to know," I say adding that to my notes.

"What are you going to do when your battery dies?" Merlin asks from the bed.

"I have a solar charger," I say. "And a large back-up battery in my bag I'm running this off of right now. I'll set that up to charge in the morning through the window but I don't want to leave the stuff in the room long. I'd rather take it with me in case someone gets nosy."

"You're a bit paranoid, aren't you?" Merlin asks.

"It has been a rough couple years," I say before saving my files and powering down my laptop. "Try to get some sleep, okay? And thank you, Merlin. I'm glad we met."

"No, thank you Rhys. I was starving," Merlin says with a grin.