Zosk POV:

It hasn’t been long since my last update. I’m still chained by my neck. I will say that I think the ring that holds my chain to the stake is getting weak. I noticed a gap in it recently. It’s not wide enough for me to get the chain loose from the stake yet but it has gotten wider. Least I think it has. I’m not too sure. I’ll keep struggling with the chain as often as possible.

Even with how long I’ve been here, I don’t want to be kept chained up here. Though I’ve said this before.

Would think I’d start slouching a little in my stance due to the weight of the collar around my neck and the chain hanging from it at all times. Thankfully, with me carrying the chain in my hand, I don’t seem to have that problem. Most of the weight of the chain while being pulled along is felt on my hand carrying it rather than my neck. That and likely all the things I do in the day do help keep me from getting too dragged down.

Still, it would be nice to be able to get free from the constant captivity I’m kept in. Sigh, oh well.

I have been getting more of the kind touch I mentioned before. Sure, they didn’t last very long but something was better than nothing. Artimis was the one to give me the attention. Mostly was on my wings but occasionally along my back as well.

I did explain to him the procedure I did with my wings when I preened them, the longer time I took to care for them. Even though there were areas I could not reach on my wings, particularly along the back, it would still take me a good while to get my wings fully preened. Not sure how long but, if things were really bad, it would take a couple of hours with my own hands running along the feathers. Artimis seemed like he was interested but not overly so.

He just always kept things short and sweet. If you want to call it sweet anyway. Maybe he’ll come to understand that, particularly when caring for me in such a way, that he’s going to have to spend a lot more time with me. And it’s not like I’m going to go very far with always being chained up.

Only if I ever slept funny would the chain really do anything to damage my wings. Otherwise the things that did were the flights I took. If the winds were bad, my feathers would get a little more messed up. But then that was part of the game even before I was chained up. The collar itself didn’t touch my wings in any way. Even if the hinge or lock points on the collar were turned some.

Guess I could be thankful for small things. Sure, I could have been chained by a wrist, both my wrists, an ankle, both my ankles or any combination of those. But I wasn’t.

Sure, being chained by my neck was its own complication but at the same time, I wasn’t. I always carried the chain in my hand anyway, to help keep it from dragging on my neck fully.

Unless the chain got behind me, which it rarely ever did, would it cause any real issues. If I strained on the collar itself, sure it kept me trapped, but it didn’t really choke me unless I rushed on the chain without holding it. Another time it would choke is if the chain got behind me and pulled on the front of my neck instead of the back.

So by holding the chain in one of my hands, not only did I keep the strain on my neck low but I also kept the collar from turning about so the chain dangled behind me. Only times I’ve had the collar turn about and the chain get at the back of my neck is while I was asleep, tossing and turning. Which thankfully, wasn’t that often unless I was having trouble sleeping.

Getting choked a few times causes you to take a little more focus and energy to make sure it doesn’t happen again. Grasping the chain the moment I woke up often ensured it was where it was when I passed out. If I didn’t feel the chain, I moved my hands to the collar to feel about for where the chain is secured to the collar.

If the chain is in front, I just follow the chain down from the collar to where it rests. Tugging some along the way as I usually did in the morning anyway in hopes that I still wasn’t trapped by it.

Now if the chain is at the back of my neck with the attachment back there, I would shift the collar around so the chain was at the front again. Tugging on the collar some with the same hope as before.

Would think my neck would be rubbed raw, but it's not. Sure, anytime I have to shift the collar or I struggle with it, I do cause it to chafe a little. But really, my neck stays in good shape. The collar is just loose enough to keep from chafing my neck too much.

Here I am, going off on another tangent about my captivity. Guess I’m kind of bad about talking about it. But then you would be I think if you were in my shoes, chained day in and day out. And besides the kind attentions I am being given on occasion, there really isn’t much to talk about.

Talking about the weather, isn’t really worth that much short of the update I made about the first storm I spent chained up in. In most cases of bad weather, I can hide in the shed to get out of it if I wanted to. Even on chilly days, it was alright in the shed. ‘Angel house’ as it’s been coined.

Guess I could say, ‘Oh it’s sunny today and the breeze is light.’ or something else but really, it’s just not worth it.

I suppose talking about my captivity just gives me hope that I’ll be free from it? I don’t know. Maybe I’m just filling words on a page to make my log feel more worth reading. If only to myself, I don’t plan to let anyone else read my plight. Really hope that no one else would have to go through with what I’m going through. Even if they become winged like I am.

Now let me off this tangent and get back to the kind feeling of the touch I’m being given in between my wings right now. If I was a cat, I think I would be purring. I was humming anyway which I guess is a good response.

Now if I was lightly scratched, scritched as I like to call it, it would often cause me to ‘croon’ in delight. Fill the air with sweet melodies.

When I crooned, I swear that the touch and attention lasted longer but I don’t know. It just felt very very good. Guess it’s just how wonderful the simple touch felt to me. But like I said before, the touch did help to ease the itching I felt. Then there was just the plain simpleness of the touch feeling good by itself. Which caused me to start crooning in the first place.

Guess I’m a real song-bird when I’m in a very content state. I had a pretty good range of sound with my voice. Sometimes I would get louder or more intense with the sound if scritched in certain spots. The back of my head and neck seemed to be some of those key spots I love to be touched on. Even if it’s rubbing, I’ll still croon cause it just feels so nice.

Now when touched on the neck, I was often rubbed or scritched above or below where the collar sat. Sometimes I would feel it being bumped or moved slightly with the touch but otherwise not often messed with.

Likely to keep the collar from rubbing on my neck too much from the movements it would make. And if I was rubbed a bit raw, I guess it was the family’s way of trying not to cause any more agony than I was already feeling.

I was starting to become more responsive to the family, even though I still had cold feelings for them with them keeping me chained up. Again, it's just hard not to be content with such wonderful attentions.

Though I think these sounds that I made and the overall contented looks I gave when being given attentions were what caused Cenitian and even Salinthia to come over and start to give me some attentions as well.

Sure I was receptive of the touch but at the same time, I tried not to be. Kind of in hopes that if I didn’t respond to the parents, they would let me go. But even if I didn’t, responding to Artimis’ touch would be enough for them to keep me chained up anyway.

----

Figured I would add this to this part of my log as well. Kind of happened right after yesterday anyway.

Woke up this morning feeling very achy, more so than if I had slept funny. I didn’t end up sleeping on the chain so it wasn’t that that would be causing the pain.

Of course I would grasp the chain and give it a tug like I always do when awakening. Nope, still chained up by it. Still have the collar locked around my neck. Sigh and groan.

Started to check about myself to try to find out the source of the pains, groaning more as I did so. Wasn’t long before I found a few feathers from my wings laying on the ground near me. I slept outside like I often do. With my wings giving me some warmth.

First I thought it was cause I slept on the wings funny but once I spotted the feathers, did I know pretty much instantly what it was. I have started molting. A rather painful process that was compounded by the fact that I’m chained up.

I pushed myself to at least sit up. A little bit of a feat in itself at the moment and I looked around. Artimis would be off to school already. Cenitian had gone to work. Salinthia was still at home. So either she had a later start or it was her day off.

I could kind of tell who was home and who wasn’t. Though it was often her who gave me breakfast so it was her I saw coming outside. Usually I would be flying to stretch my wings out when she does so. But today, I’m not.

Salinthia came up into my reach and noticed something was wrong. “Is everything okay dear?” she asked. I tended to keep conversations with the family short if at all. Think they were a little tired of hearing me complain about being chained all the time.

I groaned before I could word my response. “I’m in a lot of pain. I have started to molt. Please, unchain me.” I did add that last part, as it was something I would say much of the time anyway.

Salinthia did hear my words as she gave a concerned look. “I’m sorry but I can’t unchain you. And am sorry to hear you’re in pain.” To which I kind of rolled my eyes but well, least she responded. “Is there anything else I can do?” she asked.

I looked at her for a long moment. “Yeah. If you could get me some berries and fruits, it would help.” It was something I learned with molting that if I ate certain things in the times I could do anything that it helped. That and the research I did on my wings so long ago did say something about molts for pet birds. I needed a high amount of vitamins in my system, higher than normal. I mentioned to Salinthia that I would need this. As well as, “I’ll need to rest a lot so if I could be left alone please.”

Something about my words made her nod. Can’t tell if she looked sad or anything emotional wise but at least I was being given a response. At least it was something. I kind of knew she didn’t really care much for the idea of me being chained up all the time but she also didn’t do much to help me escape.

I ate what I was provided before running my hands over my wings. Usually I did this while I was preening to feel for broken feathers. Now I was doing it to help loosen what had already started to come out for the molt itself.

Usually it wasn't the first day that I lost the feathers that I did during the molt. That would come on the second and third day of the molt. Usually new down would already be in place of the missing feathers. I would often lose most of my feathers during a molt. The areas that I lost the most were usually right along my primaries with some of my secondaries. The coverts tended to molt a little later, right around the fourth to fifth day if I’m lucky.

Usually it took me about a week to go through a molt, sometimes longer. And often this late in the spring to early summer months. I haven’t been here long, I was captured late winter for the area. I have lost time with how long I’ve been chained up so I’m guessing it hasn’t been quite as long as I thought it has.

Usually something like a molt only happened once a year and usually around the same time in the year. Least it didn’t happen more often with me. Some birds it happens more often in a year.

Another thing that could cause a molt would be stress. Sure I’m stressed with being chained up all the time but no, this just felt like a normal molt. So for the next few days, I’m going to be pretty non-active. I’ll eat and rest. Maybe fiddle with the collar and chain a few times but otherwise I won’t be doing much else. No flying till the molt is finished and limited pacing.

Least my request for certain foods was heeded when I was given my next meal so that was a good bonus. Still though, I wish I wasn’t kept here like I am.