Belle’s POV
We are waiting for the countdown. We decided that we don’t want the crowded place so we watched from afar instead. We are now on top of a building leaning on the railings as I eat the cotton candy that Reign bought for me. To be honest, I didn’t expect her to have real money. I’m guessing that she stole those too.
“The view from up here is better than down there. It’s more fun because I get to see everything without getting pushed around by people.” I studied the city lights.
“Not when you have to do it alone,” Reign said. Her eyes were nonchalantly studying the crowd.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I chewed on the cotton candy.
She only looked at me and then returned her sight back to the crowd below us.
I didn’t really understand what she meant but it finally dawned on me after a few seconds. Reign had to spend her holidays alone for the past decades. Is this the reason why she brought us up here? Because she knows how beautiful the scenery is from here. It must have been a bittersweet feeling for her. I cannot imagine her standing here all alone every year while people below her are with their families enjoying new years.
“Well, I’m here. We could do this for the next fifty years or so.”
She turned her face to see me. “Are you not planning on getting married or settling down in this lifetime?”
I think my smile faded. “It’s not in my mind yet.”
“This cannot last forever. At least your forever in this lifetime.” She returned her gaze towards the noisy crowd below.
“Why do you have to say that?”
“The what?”
“We were happy and then suddenly you have to say that. Can’t we be friends even in my next life?”
“I am just telling the truth.”
“Well, I don’t like the truth.”
“We will definitely not meet again. Who knows where you’re going to be born next.”
“Aren’t you going to search for me?” I know I sound disappointed and it’s because I am.
I used to think of death as something that could finally make me at peace. Finally making amends with the life I’ve spent here but now it’s just sad; knowing that I won’t remember this life in my next. How much of my perspective will change about the world once I discover more about this Holy Soul thing? I guess this is the reason why I shouldn’t be aware of it.
“Your cotton candy is melting.” She pointed out.
“You really aren’t going to search for me, huh?”
“We’re not even supposed to be this close in the first place.”
I scoffed. “It’s really that easy for you to let go?”
“We don’t attach ourselves to anything. That’s why it’s easy to let go.”
I tightened my lips into a straight line trying to keep the disappointment to myself. “Have you ever not thought that we could’ve met before? But you just don’t recognize me since I probably have a whole different face?”
“I’ve seen people get reincarnated and they always have a specific feature that they keep in their next life.”
“Like?”
“I saw an old friend of mine reincarnated and she has that same freckles on her face. Another friend got reincarnated and he still has that distinct smile. None of your features are familiar to me.”
“Really? I wonder what features I kept from my last life. Wait, friends?”
“From 1900s.”
“Never made any new friends since then?”
“Not really…”
“You’re not telling the whole truth again, are you?”
“My world is difficult to understand, snoop.”
“Maybe if you explain it to me I would understand you much better and it will be easier for the both of us.”
“It’s starting.” And she changed the subject once more. Reign lowered her head to get a view of the crowd below us. Though I don’t think she’s focused on whatever is happening below us. Her mind is elsewhere.
I copied her and tried to get a good view of the whole surrounding.
“Ten!” The crowd shouted.
“Nine!” I shouted along with them.
“Eight!” I held on to Reign to signal her to shout along with us.
“Seven!”
She only stared at me. She’s studying my face. Her eyes went from my lips, nose, then eyes.
“Six!” Why do I feel like she’s planning to do something?
“Five!” I didn’t get to join the crowd. My whole body froze.
“Four!” The crowd shouted but I called Reign’s name instead. “Reign? Is there something wrong?”
“Three!” I took a step back.
“Two!” I held on to the melting cotton candy. I didn’t mind how sticky my hands were getting. I’m really nervous. Is she planning to erase my memory again? “Why do I feel like you’re saying goodbye?” I asked.
“One!” The noise from below got louder. Fireworks started to light up the sky but my heart was still beating nervously. I don’t want to forget. I don’t want to forget anything. I don’t know why. I don’t know why I want to hold onto these things but for some reason, I’m afraid of this happening again. Again? Again? Aside from the other two memories, she erased from my mind...is there another one she’s not telling me?
I closed my eyes as she stepped closer to me. No. I don’t want to forget.
“Joanna?” She muttered.
I opened my eyes. Uncontrollably, as if I’m used to responding, I answered back. “Yes, love?”
Reign scoffed as if she just got punched in her stomach and turned to her side, covering her whole face with her hands.
“Wait, what?” I asked as I returned to consciousness.
She took a step back from me.
“Wait. I didn’t mean to say that. I-I don’t know why I said that.”
“Not again.” Reign said.
“What?”
She grabbed my hand and in a blink of an eye, we returned to my bedroom. Before I could even say another word to her, she disappeared already.
Reign’s POV
I appeared in the lobby of the apartment I’m staying in. As usual, Jasmine noticed me immediately. I rushed up to my room when she stopped me.
“Someone’s not in a good mood. Happy new year.” She placed a bottle on the counter in front of her.
“What’s this for?”
“A gift. You’re the nicest tenant I have. Too human they do say.”
“This is from?”
“Don’t worry. It’s not tied to any demon.”
“I’ve been staying here for almost sixty years and this is the first time you’ve given me something.”
She rolled her eyes. “You really are not easily tempted.” She took the bottle back and smiled. “Maybe next time.”
“Probably because I already learned my lesson.” If you feed into temptation, you suffer for the rest of your life. No going back.
“Hmm…” She smiled sadly at me. “Of course you did.”
I ran up to my floor when I heard her shouting something.
“The last time I saw that face was when she broke your heart.”
I paused on my steps.
“I remember that. I was guiding you as a new demon. She was wearing a nice white dress and…”
“Shut up.”
“It seems like since then, you’ve regretted things. Since then, it has become harder and harder for you.” Her voice trailed through the hallway.
I continued to run towards my room. I slammed the door shut and removed my coat. How did I not recognize that face? How? They have the same eyes. How did I not see that? I kicked off my shoes and dropped myself on the bed. I breathed heavily. I’m angry at her. I hate her. I despise her. I can’t believe I almost fell for that again. No. Not this time. Not in this lifetime of hers.
---
It’s been hours but I’m still wide awake. This body is not that tired I guess. I sat up on my bed and examined the darkroom. I’ve probably calmed down by now. No wonder she’s trying to get close to me. Her soul must be familiar with my presence. I clenched my jaw. I closed my eyes and transported to a different place. When I opened them I was already at a cemetery staring at the tombstone.
Joanna Fibracio
January 15, 1880 - March 6, 1937
Either it took you so long to reincarnate or you were born in a different place before becoming Belle.
“You should’ve remained dead.” I threw a stone at the tombstone. “How dare you come back?” I threw another one. “Even after all these years, you still try to hurt me again! Isn't once enough?!” I threw a bigger stone that made a portion of her tombstone crack.
I shook my head. “No...not this time...you’re not going to win this one.” I picked up another stone and threw it towards the tombstone which caused the cracked part to finally fall. “Not again.”
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