Happy December everyone!
Also, watch Single all the Way on Netflix. It's SO CUTE AND ADORABLE.
-Maddie :)

DEAN'S POV

The sounds of gunshots and screams fill my ears as I recall my memories of Iraq. I stroke the long scar that ran along my wrist, and it calms me down a little. 

"As you know, I joined the Marines. What you don't know, and most people don't, is that I was taken hostage while I was in Iraq. It was a routine sweep of a nearby town where I was stationed, but it went south when we started being fired upon from above us. All at once, we were taken captive and brought to what I'm assuming was one of their camps, I was never told."

"How long were you there?"

"Long enough. There was a man there by the name of Sokar Arma- he was brutal. Everyone, even the hostiles were afraid of him. One by one, we each met him in our own way, and since I was the Squad Leader, I was first."

"Hey, if you don't feel comfortable telling me this, don't feel like you need to." Cas says, putting a hand on mine. He notices that I'm rubbing my scar harder now. "What's this from?"

"It was one of Armas departing gifts before we were rescued. It was one of my longer periods of time with him- he was trying to find out information about our camp and why we were there, and he decided that waterboarding me and slowly cutting me weren't doing the trick. He moved onto low-grade electrocution," I explain, and I pull my jacket off. Cas' eyes widen in horror when he sees the scarring wind up my wrist and around my elbow, disappearing underneath my shirt sleeve.

"Oh my god, Dean." He says, his eyes brimming with tears. "I am so sorry-"

"Hey hey hey, this isn't your fault, Cas. You had no idea."  I wipe away his tears, and I feel my heart beating a million miles a minute. I didn't realize it until now, but Cas and I had moved closer to each other, closer than we probably intended. 

"If I had known-"

"But what could you have done? You were out in New York, living your life. Besides, I had enough demons of mine to handle on my own, I didn't want to bring anyone I cared about into it. I was a mess when I came home- I would drink myself into a stupor when the screams got too loud, I would lash out at Sam when he would try and help me. Eventually, it got to be too much. Sam brought me to the VA in Santa Monica, and I got treatment there for PTSD and anger issues. I went to AA, and eventually I got out of my addiction and turned my life around."

"That's amazing, Dean. I'm proud of you."

"Thank you." I say, and we fall into a comfortable silence. While he looks over at the lake, I look at Cas. I look at every inch of Cas' face, his eyes, the freckles that cover every square inch of his nose, his lips and how they're just a little crooked on one side. 

"What?"

"Hmm?" I say, realizing that he was staring back at me.

"You were staring at me. Do I have something on my face?"

"No! No, sorry." I chuckle, and I feel my face warm. "I was just looking at your face- and I realize now how creepy that sounds."

"It's okay. I've heard creepier things than that."

"It's just.... and if I am reading into things that aren't here, please tell me. But I know that I still have feelings for you. I think I always have. I was wondering if-" 

I was cut off by his lips on mine, soft and hesitant. I take his hesitation and answer it with a firm kiss of my own. We part, and I look at Cas.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that." 

"I mean, I was the one who kissed you first, so..."

"That is true." I say, scratching the back of my neck. 

"Okay. I just want to say that I didn't think that was going to happen, but I'm not sorry about it." Cas says, his face turning red as a tomato." 

"Me neither." I say, and Cas nods slowly. 

"Cas."

"Mhm?"

"Can I kiss you again?"

"Mhm." He says, and I lean forward and kiss him again, grinning. I missed this, I think to myself.  He tastes like cinnamon and sugar. After what feels like forever, we part again, smiling.

"So, what do we do now?" I ask, and Cas grins. "You're the one who got us into this mess."

"Hm...maybe you can take me out on a date? Like, a real date?"

I scoff. "I thought the Demolition Zone was a great spot!"

"It was, but the night turned out bad and ruined our chance of reconnecting." 

"Okay, fine. I will take you on a fantastic date. It will be so great it'll knock your socks off." I say, and Cas laughs. I forgot how much I missed his laugh.

"'Knock your socks off'? I've never heard someone other than my grandfather say that before."

"Well, now you have." I say, and Cas leans in to kiss me again. 

I could get used to this.