I was in the room the Parkers had prepared for me. David did not seem to deviate much from what my dad said about him. His two sons also seemed to be nice people. My new brothers. I laughed at the sound of the word because I already had brothers, brothers who were never born. My mother miscarried four times before she was pregnant with me, but she paid for it with her life. Lucas would have been the age of that older Parker Hyacinth. Right, dad? However, he is absent, and neither is Leon, Lewis, and Liam. There is no one, I am completely alone.
I sat in front of the mirror I placed on my desk, staring at my reflection, wondering if I could bond with someone from whom I had to hide my true appearance. The removed lenses were already in special liquid containers. I was able to look into my golden eyes which I hated so much. I wondered if my siblings would also be born with this strange ability. I was hoping so, maybe it wouldn't be so overwhelming then, because someone would understand me and go through the same.
I grabbed my hairbrush and quickly brushed my auburn hair. They were already very long and required a barber's hand, but dad often forgot about such things. Probably my aunt would eventually lead me there or cut the ends herself. His skills were limited to making a simple braid. He was happy then and said that I look like my mom with this hairstyle. It was her hallmark, often in the hospital where they worked, they referred to "a lady with a beautiful, long braid". I'd only seen her in my dad's photos and memories, but I was glad I had it at least.
I glanced at the desk with the school supplies that I wanted to put in order the next day, wondering what my new class would be like. I knew that my thoughts would not let me fall asleep quickly, but I preferred to go to bed. I was just two steps from the bed when I heard the unexpected sound of the door opening. Unknowingly, I followed it and turned around. Then my eyes met that oceanic, slightly smudged blue in Victor's eyes. I felt my consciousness break out with enormous force, just like a hurricane to fall into my new brother's mind. Without knocking, just like he entered the room, not knowing what awaited him.
I saw him fall under my power, I got scared. I felt that everything had been wasted. After all, I promised not to hurt them, and I did it just hours after my arrival. Something tugged at me and I grabbed the scissors lying on the desk, intending to stick them in my eyes. I was crying and apologizing, I saw David running up to his son and holding him in his arms. I held the blades inches from my eyes, unable to make a final move. Dad said they were beautiful and extraordinary, how could I have ignored it.
“Do it!” I heard David scream. “Look what you did to my son! Do it, gouge your eyes out!”
He had that look on his face, furious and terrifying at the same time. I wanted to do this and beg for forgiveness that I would not have received because the harm had already been done. I didn't release the scissors from my hand, but I couldn't do it. Victor came in here, I didn't do it on purpose, doesn't that count? The tears made me see through a haze, but I recognized the silhouette of David, who knocked the scissors out of my hand, grabbed me, and lifted me.
“You can't even do this. You don't deserve to live. You should die, just like your brothers, mother, and then father. I wish you were never born at all,” he said with such confidence in his voice as if it were the most obvious truth.
“You're a monster!” Victor shouted, who was approaching me on his lap, his eyes blank, which he made me look into. “Look what you did to me! Look!”
I woke up sweating and scared. I was shaking all over. I touched my face, which was wet with tears. The next breaths became easier and easier, I looked around uncertainly. Not yet fully awake, it took me a while to realize where I was, but that didn't make me feel better at all. It wasn't my place, I didn't feel safe here. I wanted to run away, be somewhere else. I grabbed only one thing that was giving me a feeling of home. Then I ran out of the house with my car keys. It's good that there was no traffic that night, and that I didn't come across a police patrol. The condition I was in was not conducive to the safe driving of the car. I just wanted to find my mom and dad as soon as possible. I pressed the gas pedal even harder. After about thirty minutes, I braked sharply in front of the cemetery. I was running along the road I knew by heart, even the darkness didn't bother me. I fell to my knees at my parents' grave and placed my arms and head on the cold grave. I cried and missed them.
“Why can't I be with you?” I asked, sobbing. “Why did I have to be born like this? Why did you give me back to them, dad? I should have done it then, right? Then they could get rid of me, it would be better for everyone, right?”
Hours later, I heard my name repeated in a troubled voice several times. I recognized him. Hyacinth? What's he doing here? Before I even opened my eyes, someone put his hand over them. I touched it and moved my fingers to my wrist to feel the bracelet. I knew it well too because I chose it for a long time, so it would be a perfect gift for Victor. What's happening?
“Lulu, are you okay? What are you doing here?” Hyacinth asked nervously.
“Lucretia, my poor child!” I heard another voice, this time a female voice. “I live nearby, we have to take her there.”
I started to get nervous again and only calmed down a bit when he was in my hands again. I hugged him tightly against me and let Victor guide me further. I suddenly realized why he was acting so weird. He had to know I didn't have lenses and something we would all regret in different ways could happen. My aunt did live nearby, but we all drove up there in our cars anyway. After we got inside I went to the bathroom right away, Victor then quickly put something in my hand. Lenses? He saved me again! Sometimes I thought he was a friend I didn't deserve. I put them on quickly and finally I was able to calmly think about the whole situation.
I had a nightmare, I came here under the influence of the emotions it evoked. And now we were in the apartment of aunt Bernadette, who was not related to me but was like family to my parents. She helped my dad look after me. My mother's former warden when she started working in the hospital. This is where I stayed after my dad died, and before the Parkers took me in, as dad wanted to. I wanted to go out and ask for something warm to drink but heard my brothers arguing outside the door.
"Victor, is Lulu taking something? Are you taking anything?” Hyacinth asked nervously. I figured Victor had denied that and somehow made a point of him back. "But she hardly ever spent all night in the cemetery," replied the older one.
Comments (0)
See all