His sweat was dripping down to my skin. I could feel it flowing through my arms– this romantic-like pleasure surrounds my bedroom as if it was not filled with emptiness a few minutes ago. 

The moon was flashing its luminosity as if it was screaming to be heard yet I couldn’t see Shin’s face as for the reason that my sight is being blocked by a black handkerchief. I couldn't see all of it, I could only touch to feel it. I was blindfolded–  he was too.

The heat was spreading throughout my body. It was the usual warmth that I feel whenever Shin and I do these kinds of things.

Wrapping my arms around his neck, I could feel his jaw clenching. Breathing closely to his ears while he was rubbing “his” against mine.

I am restraining myself from making inappropriate sounds even though I know we’re both alone… together.

He was quiet yet I know he was distracted. But that's fine. We're both thinking of different people. 

There is only one thread that connects Shin and I. It was a single connection, yet a strong one. Shin and I met 9 years ago and that time, I was still 15 and Shin was 17. 

The day when they arrived in town, I was glad that the new neighborhood was not a foreigner. However, I noticed their accent. Indeed, they came from the city. One strange thing about him that really caught my attention was… he was the only one who strongly disagreed with his family's decision to move out.

At that time, from my room, I could hear him starting an argument with his parents. His parents made him take a sleeping pill as they travelled to this town. Shin was not aware that they would move out from the city.

Diana, his sister, was the first one to talk to me. The day after they moved into the town, Diana knocked at my door, apologizing for the noises done by his little brother. 

When she discovered that I was just living alone, she started befriending me. I don't know if it was just out of pity but I'm glad that she existed. 

I don't live with my parents because I was a child from an orphanage. I never saw my real parents-- not even a shadow of them. I was abandoned so I never bothered to find my parents.

Comparing Diana to his younger brother, she was an open minded and a talkative person. Every afternoon, after classes, Diana would visit me just to hear her complaints about his sadistic sibling. Back then, I would just laugh with Diana and go with the flow. There was a time when Diana suggested that I should be friends with Shin. At first, I refused but not until that day happened…

“ Those bastards… are they still contacting you?” Shin asked out of the blue. 

“ Seriously? You’re bringing up about them in the middle of sex?” I chortled while changing my position. As I sat on his top and gently attempted to leisurely continue what we were doing, he suddenly entered without giving me any warning. 

“ Ah… Shin–” I failed to hold back my voice as he continued moving his hips… roughly.

We were both trying to satisfy ourselves… to forget the things that we must escape. That’s how Shin and I helped each other. 

5 years ago when we decided to move into this city… I was there for him at those times when he discovered that his first love died. He was there for me when I wanted to forget about my past. Aside from Diana, Shin is the only person I can truly rely on. 

My blindfold dropped when Shin and I kept on moving towards satisfaction. As we reached that one seraphic climax, all of my anxiety got warded off temporarily. 

I lied down beside him. The warmth that I felt earlier… I could still feel it but the heat is gradually turning into a cold one. I can only hear his panting. We were hugging each other like children hungry for love.

" You didn't answer my question earlier. Are they still trying to contact you?" He asked again.

" They contacted me months ago but you really don't have to worry about it. I told you, they already deleted my tape," I asserted while hugging his arm tightly. I heard him letting out a sigh. 

And that's when I realized something. I always answer his question, but everytime I ask about his past, he constantly dodges it. It took me a lot of courage to ask this question but I hope this time… he'll tell me everything about him.

“ Shin… your dead lover… he’s alive, isn’t he?”