⚠️ Contains suicide.
🔞 Contains sexual activities

Two bodies embraced each other, no clothes were working as barriers for them to touch every part of them. 
"Aah." 
A moan escaped Nagomi, while Haruto was touching and teasing him. 

He stared at Haruto who was touching his body as if it was some jade, it was his treasure which he would cherish, his fragile treasure which could break any moment. Maybe he was staring too much that the latter stopped what he was doing and glanced back at him, nervous. 

"Are you sure it is okay?" 
He asked. 

Nagomi didn't say anything, rather cupped his cheeks and pulled him closer, gradually closer enough for their lips to meet? 

"I hope that answers it." He whispered seductively, shivers ran down Haruto's spine and all of his reasoning broke. He had always wanted to embrace Nagomi, always wanted to see him panting and moaning below him and after getting a bit of his taste he was hungrier for Nagomi more than ever. 

Hot moans filled the room and their tongues swirled around each other, exploring every hidden spot. They had lost count of how many times they had done it that night, both of their minds hazy in pleasure. 

Sweat beads formed covering their whole body and fingers traced each other, unravelling and discovering every part of the other's body, from deepest to shallow. It didn't matter as long as they could feel and touch and devour each other, till their flesh and soul felt one.

"S-stop, not there." Nagomi caught his breath, panting under Haruto. 

"Ngh, slow-er" 

"C-cumming...." 

Nagomi's voice slurred and his toes curled in pleasure. Despite his words, Haruto didn't slow down but fastened his pace, every thrust hitting the latter's sweet spot and making him writhe in every movement. 

"I love you Nagomi."

Haruto said his name, the latter flustered at his sudden surprise attack. He pushed him with a little bit of strength he had left but Haruto didn't budge instead his grip tightened on Nagomi. 

"I love you, I do."
He kissed the top of his forehead before laying beside Nagomi, engulfing him in his arms. 

Nagomi pushed Haruto. 

"We need to clean up."  He whined. 

"But do you have enough strength to move?" 

Nagomi's face turned beetroot red that spread till his neck. 

"Shut up and clean me too." 

His voice had turned hoarse after a long session, moaning and groaning. Haruto chuckled and caressed Nagomi's cheek with his thumb. 

"Let's stay like this, for a bit." He placed a kiss on top of his head before nuzzling his head on Nagomi's nape. 
Nagomi sighed and hugged him back before slowly- his droopy eyes already gave in to sleepiness. 

                                 **** 

Nagomi woke up to the sound of rain, he shuffled around for a while in search of heat and finally calmed down when he got a hold of a big log sleeping beside him. He leaned against Haruto's back and nuzzled his head- feeling the rhythmic pace of his breath. 

Thinking about what had happened just the other day, a knot formed in his chest and he giggled at the thought. Looking under the sheets he realised that Haruto had cleaned him as well as changed the sheets. 

Unable to contain his feelings, he rolled towards the other side; his gaze fell upon the used condoms in the trash bin. 

What's the use of condoms when I can't even carry a baby? 

Suddenly, the red fuming face of Sasaki Mio flashed in his mind and her words pricked his heart.

It's your fault, you robbed Haruto of his true happiness. You robbed him of his family.

All the giddy feelings he had come crashing down, deluged by now gloomy thoughts. 
Uncertainty filled him.
It was all vague now, was Haruto truly happy? Will he still love Nagomi once his senses clear? 

Fearing that the latter would wake up, he slowly dragged himself out of their room and entered his. He saw the guitar lying there and sat down in front of his table, opening up his note- scared that the feeling of warmth that was still lingering would disappear; he wrote down the title of the new song he always wanted to write; Haru. 

                                 **** 

Haruto woke up to the cold side of the bed, he drowsily opened his eyes, Nagomi was not there. Groggily he opened his phone wanting to check the time. 

10 am 

The rain was still pouring down and the curtains fluttered every time the cold wind blew caressing Haruto's cheeks- it was a pleasant feeling. He threw his clothes on and wanted to check on Nagomi when a small black MP3 player caught his attention. 

It wasn't here before. 

He walked towards the other side and saw a small note attached to it; Haru.
Without any second thought, he plugged in the earphones and played the player. 

The strums of guitar greeted his ears slowly accompanied by the slow yet soothing voice of his beloved. It was not like any other of his songs; how could he describe it? He could feel the warmth conveyed through Nagomi's voice with each word. Despite the chilly atmosphere, he could feel spring. 

But as the song progressed the feeling of restlessness sprouted in his heart. 

The lyrics and music are lively but why does Sato-san sound sad? His voice sound cheery but Haruto could tell, it was not how Nagomi truly sounded when he was happy.

It was only afterwards that Nagomi had recorded for him, he knew the meaning behind his wavering tone. The alarm inside his head buzzed louder than ever. 

'You know Haru, I tried my best. I did,  but maybe I am just one of those characters who would never the get character development.'

Haruto's heart beat faster and he started to look for Nagomi. 

"Sato-san!" 
He called out but no response. 

'Maybe you too will curse at me for my decision, maybe you will forget me soon but I want you to know that I loved you and I never regretted meeting you.' 

The words rang through his mind over and over again. 

'Where did you go, Sato-san?'
He checked outside the balcony. 

'Meeting you was a miracle and being with you has been the happiest part of my life, so don't bear any guilt for my decision.'

The player was still on but his mind was occupied with the thoughts of Nagomi, he remembered what Mr Nakamura had said to him one time he visited. 

'It may look like he is doing fine on the outside but don't let him out of your sight. His bipolar attack may hit anytime.'

"No, please no." He mumbled, racking up his brain thinking about every possible place Nagomi could be. 

Crackle 

A loud thunder startled Haruto and broke him from his train of thoughts. 
His mind suddenly cleared out and one word came to him. 

Roof. 

Without wasting any second, he left the room and dashed towards the elevator.
He pressed the button repeatedly but it didn't work. 

Stairs. 

He practically jumped through all the stairs just to reach the rooftop, he needed to make sure what he thought was not true. 

'I got stronger because of you but this time monsters inside my head were stronger. So in another life, I will have a lot fewer scars and will be able to embrace you without any guilt.'

The player was still playing.

There were a lot of things that Haruto wanted to say when he met Nagomi but when he opened the door and saw Nagomi smiling peacefully looking at him with headphones on, the time stopped for him and he froze on the spot. Despite his mind running miles with words, he couldn't utter a word. 

'Haruto, move.'

He screamed internally but his legs had given up. He didn't know what to do. He was scared but he couldn't root out scared of what.

Nagomi opened his eyes, a sad smile etched his face and his gaze fell upon Haruto- who was staring at him frozen. He hesitated for a bit and mouthed a few words, his smile never left his face.

"Sorry, Haru. I love you." 

Haruto's eyes widened when he saw Nagomi gradually slipping down from his line of sight and gathered all the strength to run there but it was too late. 

Haruto extended his hands but the distance was too much to cover and Nagomi didn't extend his hand either, rather his sad smile turned into a peaceful one- as if he had given up on all the longing and attachments he had. 
He watched his lover falling while he clutched the railings crying out his name over and over again till his lungs gave out. 

The player spoke one last time. 

But till then goodbye my love, goodbye my spring, goodbye my last song.