Do you remember that female clerk? Yeah, the one that seized the suspicious spray can. She seemed to be able to see the Crow of All Evils. To be more specific, that malign bird stole that can from her while we were diverted by all those flashy lights and tempting screens surrounding us.
Since I’m obsessed with classic videogames, I took Vanessa to the Halls of Arcadia. What’s that? Well, it’s the section where you can calmly play pong or destroy asteroids or even battle one of the kongs. I can’t recollect which one because they’re just too many out there! Our targets were those racing games, one of them can even make you destroy your thumb in order to win!
That jerk of Jake the pest didn’t like them, they made him feel quite old. I’m not gonna complain about this, that gave Vanessa and I the chance to spend some quality time together. At least that was what we thought before we started playing Endure. Her hand was aching after a while, impeding her to go past the night mode.
“Damn it, Fred! I’m quitting right now!” my friend yelled out.
“Yeah, yeah” I tried to calm her down. “I know it’s hard for newbies but it’s a lot of fun once you get used to it!”
“That’s crap! I better change to any galaga like game” Vannie told me.
We spent there an hour or so till we wanted to tear off our guts. Our next game was Grappler and she definitely thought the female characters could beat the fat Japanese or the Russian wrestler. Some of my pushes and wraps should suffice to convince her that brute force really matters there. From her unusual viewpoint agility and flexibility were the things that actually makes the difference. Yeah right…
“Darn!” she exclaimed out of the blue. “I won’t beat you now that I’m hungry, you little bastard!”
“I’m glad you’re being honest with me…” I reacted not hiding my sudden disbelief.
“Let’s have some fried chicken!” Vanessa conveyed. “I’ve heard they offer a delicious barbecue sauce and I wanna give them my very own score.”
Since I had no objections to ever make then, we stopped gaming and went straight to the food court. There was that uncomfortable feeling again, it was the Big Brother’s eye… or eyes in this case. Is there a place where you won’t be bothering me, scumbag? You’ll never make me obey or fear you! At least that was what I wanted to tell him, but I’m on a date after all.
“You’re worried sick about the cameras, aren’t you?” she read my mind. “Perhaps you shouldn’t, only the security guards got access to them so why bother?”
“I don’t wanna sound crazy but they can be hacked as well so there are many reasons why I’d worry about them” this servitor explained.
How could I explain her that the world vaccination pass is part of the problem? Right, I’ve only found it while playing multiplayer games online so why would she ever believe poor me? I’d just sound as an stupid news junkie that can’t sleep at night while reading tons of news without disregarding any fake news. Maybe just maybe, I shouldn’t forget I might be listening to some insolent crow cawing like an evil messenger of darkness all night long.
“You know what?” Nessie the human being broke the ice. “Why don’t we enter the chambers? I’ve never been there, it might be a truly amazing adventure.”
“All that I’ve heard about that place was it’s called El Derian Chambers after some in-game event” I remembered after making a small effort.
“Haven’t you been there?” Jake the eavesdropper made his comeback. “Since you got the stamp on your hands, you should be able to interact with its most advanced systems with ease…”
Our chaperon didn’t keep talking as expected after realizing our stamps were not printed on our right hands. I guess you might know by now that I told you how I had prevented them from doing so at the entrance. Based on his funny face it seems he didn’t like that at all, as we were some sort of dissidents or even public enemies. This is typical of darn commies!
“Great! We’ll become an integral part of the lizard people for real!” Vannie joked, hopefully.
The truth is that she made me recollect some old TV show that didn’t last on air for long. ¡It seriously had lizards pretty much everywhere! I came to a point where I started suspecting she might be an actual lizardous girl, but I’d be a real paranoid if I believed that from the bottom of my heart. Still, my guts told me that was exactly the case here. Or were her bites that made her look like a real predator? Not even the evil crow would ever dare to draw close to her!
“I’d say the cat or tiger clan would suit you better, darling” I corrected her as a mere test.
“It’s true, we’d think that my obsession with fried chicken gives me away in no time” the self proclaimed lizard or cat girl Vanessa admitted.
“There are two topics that you should not discuss with a lady, they’re her age and her secret identity, you moron!” the infamous Slime Face remarked.
What the feathered hell was that!? My sworn enemy was listening to our private conversation! If it weren’t because of my previous fight, I’d surely have killed him right at the spot! There had to be a clean way to get rid of such a wandering plague once for all…
“You know, Fred, nowadays rumors spread wide in a matter of days” the blockhead elaborated. “And I had to find out on my own why one of my closest friends would ever dare to stab me on my back all of sudden.”
“Because you’re famous only due to being an addict, the idiot that elites adore” Vanessa and I replied at the same time.
That reaction of hers made me feel hopeful, it was that or she had read my mind again in order to repeat what I’d say next, thus earning my trust. What if she were a secret agent that’s got the mission of becoming my friend, my confident? With a shape like hers it wouldn’t take long to make it happen…
By the way, another female employee had been walking through the section over and over again every five minutes. She did a terrible job at sweeping the floor, I guarantee! How curious! There was no bodyguard tailgating Slime Face as it should be the case with any alleged star.
“Tell me something, Jake” I inquired of him “out of dumb luck did he make it here thanks to your despicable assistance? I’d say that’s how it took place.”
“So what? Unlike some bastard traitor sitting on a stool right now, I’m a reliable friend” the chaperon confessed as the culprit he actually is.
“I know that” I told him. “that scoundrel of Slime Face can be a true coward that instantly leaves you behind when you need him the most, he, he.”
Jake became furious after my statement and pretended to hit my face with his own fist, but Slime stopped him by simply waving his right hand. It appeared to be quite amazing how he’d keep that moron under control. Was he his actual pet monster? I gotta find out what’s their evil master plan before it’s too late for all of us.
When the stress level lowered a bit in the surrounding area I kept chewing my junk food. When I picked the napkin in order to clean my mouth and sip my soda, I noticed something curious on that partially rugged piece of paper. Then I unfolded it and there was a note written on it. It clearly said “Beware of the club.”
That wasn’t a good clue in my humble opinion, it never mentioned what club was that. How was I supposed to avoid a confrontation when I don’t even know who’s my actual enemy? I resorted to check out the tray and the only thing I’ve found was a brief reference to a place that seemed to be German. Well, it’d be Dutch as well, I dunno.
Wait a second… There also was an A character with a quite peculiar design printed at the lower right corner. What does it mean? Huh? That fast food restaurant is linked to aliens? No, that doesn’t make any sense. Oh no! I think I’ve remembered that already. It gotta belong to the masons! Now that I think about it, that symbol looked vaguely similar to their rule and compass! What a pity that I only recently found out how important that was…
“Did you find anything worth mentioning, homie?” Nessie queried.
“Pfft, no way!” I had to lie to my sweet friend. “I wish I ever did, it’d make this get a lot more interesting, don’t you think?”
“It’d depend on what you had found so far, like a rare dinosaur bone or an ancient artifact worth thousands of bucks” she wondered.
“That’d hardly happen in my humble opinion” I had to explain her. “I also think we’ve spent too much time eating here, probably we’d go to those chambers you mentioned some minutes ago.”
Usually I’d have refused to even consider it seriously, yet, the nefarious Slime Face’s presence made me change my mind in a short period of time. In the worst case scenario, he’d become just another game character, giving me the sole opportunity to beat him up without facing any real consequences. OK, I was already guessing at this point we were gonna submerge in some sort of virtual sea of role playing adventures, meaning we’d control some customizable 3D characters. In case they were in 2D, I’d not go any further.
“As a sincere token of my appreciation I’ll tell you that you’d never forget to pay a visit to the Tavistock Academy every so often” the shady Slime Face offered his advice.
“Oh really?” I reacted abruptly. “And why’s that, Slowpoke Faced Guy?”
“You always come up with weird nicknames out of your deep distrust, he, he!” the lame singer added. “That place is well known for its basic and intermediate tutorials so pretty much nobody skips them, they always return to learn more or improve their stats a little bit during their funny contests.”
I had to highlight it “Now you’re saying it’s a happy world where everybody hangs along peacefully, except for those contests, of course.”
“That piece of advice is golden, you’d be a real moron if you choose to ignore him” Jake the viper bit.
“Come on, Fred!” Nessie shouted out. “It’s about time you stand up and follow me to the El Derian Chambers, I doubt you’d find anything funnier than that in the whole store.
How difficult it is to think before we act! Under such peer pressure and my eternal will to stay away from that darn Slime Face, I’d not resist for any longer than five or ten minutes. I know very well now that my story’s saddening, but who cares! I was accompanied by a damn good princess, that’s something a male like me shouldn’t ever underestimate. It’d make no sense. Would you have taken another path instead?
“Fine, Vanessa!” I surrendered then. “We’ll do your bidding but just this time.”
“Oh please! There was no other option, pal!” she happily emphasized.
“The truth is I’d still repent for going there…” I claimed.
“Don’t be ridiculous!” she protested. “you’re no longer a kiddo that needs his mommy’s or granny’s approval or else he’d get grounded for the next three months.”
“Let’s stop arguing anymore!” I raised my voice to put an end to my own hesitation. “From now on we’re heading to the famous chambers and spent some good time there while exploring them.”
“Yay! That’s the spirit, Fred!” Vanessa complimented me then.
On our way to the next section, I watched a guy wearing a black shirt with an inverted red star on it. Nah, that couldn’t be something creepy, right? Somehow I think he was interested in purchasing some special goggles at a seemingly high price. I was wondering why just when a black cat crossed my path before vanishing. That didn’t make me feel any better indeed.
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