After waving goodbye to Sara and Noah, Callie and I shuffled into the empty house, setting our bags on the ground.
"You know..." I started, struggling to stifle the smile threatening to spread onto my face. "He's really sweet on you."
Callie—who had been focussed on something on her phone as she mindlessly ambled further into the house—snapped her head up the instant the words left my mouth, turning to look at me. "What?" she asked, voice alarmed.
"Noah... Like, from someone who knows nothing... He seems like he might almost... like you."
But then that familiar scowl took hold of her face. "That's exactly it, Lexi. You don't know anything."
"Look, I'm new here and it's only been one day at school... But after the fight you and I had when we got here I'm just thinking that maybe... maybe a lot of this is all in your head."
"In my head?"
"That didn't come out right... All I know is, from what I saw, everyone was in awe to see you walking today when you first arrived, but you were too busy looking at the ground. And they all were giving you friendly smiles, but you hunched into yourself. And two boys had nothing but smiles for you today, so it seems to me that it's all in you—"
"You can't come back here and think you know everything. You left. You weren't here when I had to listen to everyone say I look ugly with only one leg. Or when the boys laughed at me and called me a pirate. Or when I confessed to Adam Turner in the 9th grade and he laughed at me and said 'do you think anyone would ever like a one-legged monster like you'."
A part of me was mad that she was coming at me like this, though the other part had Aunt Jojo's words lingering in my mind. Callie was right. I wasn't here when this all happened. If anyone had spoken to my sister like that in front of me, I would have punched them right in the face... even if I had been struggling to look at her at the time too. But the people she knew back then had changed from what I could see. No one cared about her disability anymore. The only obstacle left for her was in her head... but how do I make her see that when my words weren't working?
"Exactly. You know I'm right," she said when I didn't say anything. "So stop thinking you can comment on things you don't know. Because you don't know a damn thing, Lexi." With that, Callie began to storm away from me—as best as she could. But as she did, I noticed there was a limp to her step. One that wasn't there this morning.
She must have been hurting all day but was too scared of the stigma to say anything or take her leg off, I thought to myself. After her door slammed shut down the hallway—Callie making her final dramatic point that she was angry with me—I walked down to my room, falling onto my bed, and staring at the ceiling until mum came home.
Mum could tell something was off as she tried to grill us about our days when we had dinner that night. But we both only had one word responses for her. Eventually she sighed and gave up, stating that 'if we keep acting like this by the weekend, then we're going to have to have a family talk'. Though the threat didn't seem to phase Callie as she wheeled away from the table—her prosthetic certainly off for the evening—and dumped her plate in the sink. She thanked mum for dinner then mentioned something about homework before heading off to her room.
"Let me guess," mum said, turning to me. "You have homework too?"
I shook my head at her. "Though I do have to put my washing away. So I'm going to do that."
"And then?" she said, voice tainted with a little bit of sadness.
But I shot mum a smile before I said, "Maybe we could start a show together or something? We no longer have to do watch parties now that I'm here."
Mum grinned back all the way to her eyes before she nodded. "Sounds perfect, Lexi. I'd say we should try to convince your sister to join us but..." Mum glanced down the hallway towards Callie's room. "I think she just needs some time. I imagine all these changes are overwhelming for her."
Yes... everything is overwhelming for her. But let's not forget what I've been through... But as soon as the snarky thought entered my mind, I felt guilty. Because mum was never going to quite understand how I was coping with the loss.
As I put away the final clothing item in my cupboard, I pulled the mirrored door shut, liking the smile that was finally on my face. I was glad I was happier these days after months of pain and sorrow... even if I was hiding a part of myself and if Callie hated my guts most of the time. But this situation certainly wasn't worse than Melbourne. I lost two people when we learned of the cancer. And even though Mia and I had broken up six months ago, she was still one of the closest friends I had before our feelings for each other went and complicated everything.
But as I began to turn around to head back to the living room, I noticed something missing. Leaning closer to the mirror, I pulled my hair to the side, noticing my favourite earring was gone—one that Jess had given me for my birthday last year.
"No," I muttered. "No, no, no," I said again, turning around, frantically looking at my bedroom floor.
Please don't tell me I lost it at school. I can't have lost it. It's too important.
Falling to my knees, I crawled the entire surface of my floor, looking for the tiny golden moon. But nothing was there.
In my last desperation, I ducked down and glanced under my bed, hoping, praying, I had somehow kicked it under.
Then something shined right by my memory box.
Grinning, I reached under, fingers clasping the tiny metal object as I pulled it out to inspect.
"Thank heavens," I breathed. But rather than slipping it back in, I took my other earring out and popped them both into my bedside table for safe keeping.
Though as I sat on the floor, waiting for my accelerating heart to slow down as the relief eased through my body, my eyes kept flickering back to the memory box.
Slowly, I reached back over to under the bed, pulling the box out and glancing inside.
Find common ground, Jojo said... What do Callie and I possibly have in common these days? She likes science, I like art. She likes boys, I like girls. She barely tries with her appearance, while I love the expressionism of makeup and fashion. She reads books, I go for walks and play video games. We have nothing in...
But then my eyes flickered to the list poking out, zeroing in on the two names at the bottom.
Fraser Fowler... and Noah Hashimoto. Both we saw today... Fraser when he tried hitting on me in Film. Noah... when his eyes had turned into love hearts while looking at Callie.
I pulled the list from the box, scanning through the names again. My brows furrowed as I looked at them. I certainly recognised some of them today, but either a few had changed a lot with puberty or a few had left. Nonetheless, there were at least half of them still at school... that I knew of.
Callie refuses to see that Noah likes her... she thinks she's not good enough because one boy told her that when they were fourteen.
What if... what if I change that perspective?
What if I get the boys to look at her?
Show her that she could have anyone she wants?
A smirk took hold of my face. But before I could plan further, my door burst open. "Lexi, are you com—" mum stopped, eyes flickering from me, to the box, to the list in my hands. "What's that?" she asked, coming closer.
"Nothing," I quickly said.
"Tell me!" she said, sitting on the floor next to me. But I quickly buried the list deep in the box. "What are you hiding?" mum asked, eyes narrowing.
"Nothing," I repeated, feeling my heart hammer in my chest. Because, the reality was, if I somehow convinced Callie to complete the kiss list, mum would totally not approve. When she was our age, she had big plans of becoming a doctor, getting a good job, marrying well, and then settling down for kids. But then she went to one party and dad knocked her up. Unfortunately she lost that kid, but it only took a year until somehow she got pregnant again. After we were born, mum never quite found a way to finish her studies. So now she was just a receptionist at a doctor's office.
And while she's not against either of us having boyfriends (not that I would), she's very much an anti-party person. I learned that after telling her about the first one I went to, deciding to not share such information with her again. And she certainly wouldn't approve of us—or Callie—kissing a bunch of different boys whom she wasn't dating, because she'd just assume something else would come after that.
"Lex, you're worrying me now," mum then said as my eyes continued to stare widely at her and I could feel my palms sweating at the thought that she'd pull out the box and start searching.
So I shoved my hand back in the box and pulled out the first piece of paper I found. "I was just looking at this." I barely glanced at it as I handed it over to her, worrying that Callie and I had come up with some other stupid thing that she was never meant to see.
But as her excited eyes started to gloss over with confusion and the smile dropped from her face, she looked up at me and said, "Why are you looking at Callie's participation award for year four sports carnival?"
"Because... um... I think it's funny she didn't win anything even then."
Mum's eyes narrowed, but then she shook her head and tucked it back into the box. "You're a weird one, Lex. Ready to go watch something?"
"What are we watching?" I asked, getting to my feet and following her out.
"I figured we'd start that TV show adaptation of that book series your sister reads at least once a year... Magic Mutations?"
Laughing, I said, "Surely she wants to watch it too."
Mum shrugged. "Part of my plan. I figured that maybe once she hears the dialogue on screen she will join us."
In the end, we only got five minutes into the show. Callie's door burst open and the sounds of her foot thudding against the ground echoed through the house.
Pausing the show, we both turned in surprise as Callie jumped her way down the hall, hand bracing her body against the wall.
"What have I said about hopping on your good leg?" mum scolded, clambering to her feet and running to Callie's side to help her to the couch. "You have a perfectly good chair, crutches, and prosthetic. Don't put unnecessary strain on your other ankle."
"I already disinfected my leg and couldn't be bothered grabbing my chair or crutches," Callie complained, not even looking at either of us as mum helped her onto the couch. Her eyes were glued to the screen. "Start from the beginning. I've been dying to watch this."
Mum took the seat in between us, arm extending around both of our shoulders, then I hit play on the remote.
Comments (0)
See all