"I lost it then. I got angry. Why can't you love me? Why can't you love me!? I kept yelling at them. I roughly grabbed their shoulders and yelled into their face. They begged me to stop. They said we should break up and go our separate ways now. That made me even more angry. What does that person have that I don't!? Why can't you love me!? I was crazy. For a moment I thought I'd never experience love like this again. They were my one and only. I couldn't let them get away. I kept being rough with them, not allowing them to leave me.

"I couldn't believe myself... my cruel actions... I hit them like they'd love me if I beat them into it. I wanted to keep them locked in my house and make them stay with me forever. But I was turning into a monster. Love doesn't come if you force it. It comes naturally. And they had already fallen out of love with me. Of course there was no way they could love me after this too. They escaped and called the police on me. I was in prison for a couple years. I took that time to really reflect on myself. I still regret my actions all these years later..."

Cade hunches over, trying to hold in a sob. It escapes him anyway. "I want to apologize... I want to apologize so bad... I want them to hurt me like I did to them so they can feel better... I'm so sorry I did that to them... I should die for what I've done... it was so inhumane... I'm an actual monster... if you're a vampire, then I'm something close to it... I'm a devil..." Cade sobs for a moment. I'm silent.

Cade sniffs and wipes his eyes. He lets out another sob but he tries to continue talking. "And that's why... that's why I'm doing what I'm doing now... I don't want anyone to hurt, but there's already so many people still hurting in this world... I feel like it's my fault in a way... poor children have been orphaned and live in poor conditions... I want them to grow up happy and cared for... I want them to experience love so they don't become like me... obsessed with love since I never experienced it until then..." Cade continues wiping the neverending tears and sniffs back his snot.

"I expose awful organizations because those usually treat humans like they aren't humans..." Cade continues. "Like how I didn't treat the one I loved like a human... I want to purge awful people who do that but I'm one of them... I considered offing myself so many times it's not even funny... And last but not least, I raise money for charity... so maybe people in abusive relationships can get help like the one I loved had needed... so maybe those in poor conditions can have a better chance at life... so maybe I can prevent good people dying in this world... so I can help those in need instead of hurting them..."

Cade is a pile on the floor, sobbing into the carpet. He looks pathetic. I can't look at him. I've done worse things than him but as soon as he did that one horrible thing, he immediately wanted to change. He's so much better than me. It's true what he did was awful. But he turned his life around and completely changed. It's sad he hasn't realized that he's become a good person. I know what he's done will always haunt him and the person who he did it to. But humans are remarkable. They can move on and grow from these experiences. They can grow into better people.

I've always been the almighty awful vampire... How can an immortal change? I'll get bored again and I'll want to kill again for some type of excitement. I can't improve myself and change like humans can. I really shouldn't be looking down on them so much. They can be amazing if they try. I mean they restrained me, the most powerful vampire that ever lived.

"Cade," I say.

Cade flinches. Then he lifts his head, his face a mess. I try to move closer to him, the best I can without hands to help. I lean down and lick his eye to wipe his salty tears. Cade widens his eyes and stares at me.

"A monster is a monster because it can't change how horrible it is. But you've changed yourself. You regret your actions and are trying to make up for them with good. You've become a good person with this," I tell him.

Cade only stares at me. Tears silently spill out of his eyes. I lean down to lick them up again. I really wish he'd stop crying now...

Cade takes in a shaky breath. "Silas... do you think you're a monster?"

I pause. "Huh?"

Cade finally wipes his runny nose with the back of his hand. He wipes his eyes with his other hand. "It's just... it kind of seemed like you were talking about yourself..."

I can't say anything. He saw right through me. Does he have the power to read expressions easily too?

"If you think you're a monster... you should reconsider." Cade stops crying and looks into my eyes. "You could have killed me. But you haven't yet. You could kill me right now. But you aren't. You could have killed that burglar. But you didn't. When I came home, you even looked at a loss for what to do. You weren't thinking about killing him at all. You aren't a horrible monster that only knows how to kill... so don't think you are, alright?"

I run his words through my head. His words are true... maybe I have changed, if only a little bit. It was because of Cade that I did. I would have stayed scared and bitter for all eternity if not for him. I almost want to laugh. I never expected to be in this type of situation. I never expected to be able to change.

"...alright," I say. "Only if you believe my words first. Then I'll believe yours."

Cade slowly smiles and furrows his brow. "Alright... from one monster to another, let's both accept that we've changed."

A small smile spreads on my face. "Very well."

"Huh? Huh?? A smile!!" Cade points at my mouth.

I immediately stop smiling.

"Wait! You smiled! I saw it! You can't deny it!! You actually smiled!!" Cade seems way too excited about this.

"Stop being annoying," I look away.

"Haha! But you smiled! Why don't you smile more?? It's cute!"

"Cute...!?" What in the world is this human saying!?

Cade laughs with a happy grin. I guess I'll let it go if he's that happy about it...

I follow Cade to the bathroom. He washes his face. When he's done, he stares at himself in the mirror.

"Oh man... my eyes are all puffy." Cade pokes his puffy eyes.

"You cried a lot," I commented.

"Yeah, thanks, I know..." Cade shows annoyance. "I need something cold to get the puffiness down."

Cade leaves the bathroom and goes to the kitchen. He opens the freezer. He grabs an ice cube and puts it to his eye. He sighs and sits in a chair. I join him. The ice cube melts and the water runs down his hand and face. It's like he's crying again.

"Silas..." Cade suddenly says. I stop focusing on the ice cube. "When you, uh... licked my tears... it was oddly seductive... are you coming onto me?" Cade glances at me.

I try to process his words. "What?" Is all I can say.

"You!! You licked my tears like some puppy trying to cheer me up!! Do you like me!?" Cade exclaims.

I pause. "...I don't know. Perhaps I don't hate you."

"That's not what I... whatever." Cade turns away, dropping the subject. I don't quite understand what he's getting at.

We sit in silence. Cade is a mess again with the melted ice cube. He curses to himself that that was a bad idea and cleans up the water. He gets a bottle from the fridge that's cold and puts it to his eyes. I remember something he said when he was telling me his story.

"...Cade. You said something like... you had never experienced love until your last relationship. What did you mean?" I ask.

Cade freezes. Then he slowly removes the bottle from his eyes. He stares at it in his hands.

"I guess... since I told you about part of my past... I should tell you everything else..." Cade says. He puts the bottle in the fridge then comes to sit down again. He rests his chin in his hand.

I wait patiently for him to tell me. I want to know everything. It's strange... since he just opened up and was at his worst in front of me... I want to know more and more about him. I want to learn more. I want to see more. Have I become messed up? Well, I was messed up before. This just seems different. This human has captivated my interest.

"To make a long story short," Cade starts, "I didn't have the best parents. They didn't really care about me. I never felt that they loved me. I wanted them to be like other kids' parents, but they half-assed whatever they did for me. They didn't even try to make an effort. I moved out as soon as I could. Now I don't know what they're doing, and they don't know what I'm doing. They probably don't care to find out. Can't say I do either."

"So when you finally got a taste of love, it made you crazy..." I say.

"Guess so..." Cade stares at the table. Then he stretches his arms in the air and leans back in his chair. "What about you? What were your parents like?"

My parents... it's been so long. With the amount of years I've lived and the amount of things I've experienced, the ones who gave birth to me are like a distant memory. I try to dig up that memory.

"I believe my parents were caring and raised me well..." I say. Cade watches me to listen. "But I can't remember much. All I remember is them being killed by humans and that was the end of that."

"Whoa, what?? There's gotta at least be more details about that! How'd that even happen??" Cade is startled.

"Humans figured out my parents were vampires, they set up a group to hunt them, they attacked my parents and they died. That was common in my day."

"What about you?? Did they not kill you because you were a child??"

"No, I killed them."

Cade takes a moment to process. "How old were you...? You killed the humans that killed your parents?"

"I believe I was 10... yes, I killed them. Otherwise they would have killed me like my parents. I didn't want that to happen."

"Why does it sound like you don't remember this traumatic event clearly... Saying "I believe"..."

"Because it was thousands of years ago."

"I can't wrap my head around that..." Cade looks unwell. "Wait... but you're the king of vampires, right? When did you figure that out? Could those humans not have been able to kill you anyway?"

"I figured out I was the king when I was stronger than every other vampire I made contact with. I also realized I didn't have the same weaknesses as lesser vampires. In fact, I don't seem to have a weakness at all. I didn't know that when I was 10. I just killed to survive at that time."

"You do have one weakness... you can't reattach limbs if they're cut off or you can't grow new limbs, right?"

I pause. "I shouldn't have told you that..."

"But how'd you even figure that out?? It had to be by experience. You look like you have all of your limbs." Cade eyes my body.

I sigh. "I lost a finger... but my hands are bound so you can't see it."

"Oh?? Which finger??" Cade is morbidly curious.

"My pinky finger. On my left hand."

"And how'd that happen...?"

"A close encounter with another vampire. Usually vampires don't wield knives... but this one was crazed..." It's an odd memory to think back on. Despite them cutting my finger off, I finished them off quickly and easily. I cut all of their fingers off for good measure, then ended them.

"Wow..." Cade seems in awe at my backstory.

I look out the window and it's dark outside. I wasn't aware of the time when Cade came to talk to me... but I feel like we've talked for a while. Now it's getting late.

"Did you have dinner?" I ask.

Cade checks his watch. "Oh. I guess it's about that time. Will you eat with me?"

"....if I have to."

"What does that mean?? Haha, come on!" Cade stands up. I like seeing his joy.

Cade starts dinner and I watch him make it. He seems more lively. We shared parts of our pasts with each other. I feel we've become closer. It's still a strange feeling. I'm not hating it though.